Chapter 1: setting it up
"Sure, I'll be in. Sounds like a great joke. Should be lots of fun."
That was what I'd said when Zola had asked me to take part in a skit she wanted to put on at her sister's eighteenth birthday party.
Zola was sixteen, a couple of months younger than me, and she had a large extended family who liked to enjoy themselves whenever they got an excuse. She wanted to entertain them with an act that supposably involved five girls doing a chorus line dance, but one of the 'girls' wouldn't be a girl, 'she' would be a boy. Then Zola was going to ask the guests to pick the one who wasn't actually a girl. Naturally, I assumed that the non-girl would be pretty obvious, so I was going to be that non-girl.
Zola's idea was much more elaborate than I'd anticipated. We were all going to wear identical outfits, shoes and so on.
We had six weeks to get the act ready: practice three times a week - with a dance instructor, would you believe! - and dress fittings . . . hey, hang on!
"Oh, Kyle, don't let me down, please. You'll be terrific."
"Er, okay . . . okay."
Then during the last two weeks, dress rehearsals with dresses, shoes, make-up, hairdo's (a wig for me) the whole shebang - including shaved legs - shit!
Bloody hell, I was having serious doubts. I really didn't want to do this anymore, but I was trapped. I would feel a total prick to pull out at this late stage and blow the whole thing.
Some of the other girls were having doubts as well.
"Zola, Kylie looks too good. Nobody's going to be able to tell." - Yeah, that's right, 'Kylie'. They had all started calling me that. Pretty obvious, I guess.
Zola laughed, "If they can't tell, too bad. It will be an even bigger joke."
Chapter 2: the party
The party was held out the back of Zola's parent's grand house in this large entertainment area. Zola's parents were very well off, as were most of her extended family.
There must have been over a hundred people there, all sorts of ages and shapes and sizes.
Lashings of food, plenty of booze, a string quartet - they knew how to enjoy themselves, this lot.
We 'skit girls' watched proceedings from an upstairs window waiting for the call.
It came.
We performed on a temporary stage and we were good. I'm not bragging when I say that there wasn't a misstep; we wowed them.
When we finished, Zola leapt up onto the stage to share the applause; she introduced each of us by name (me as Kylie) and then announced that one of us was actually a boy dressed up and made to look like a girl: "Can you tell which one?"
The crowd didn't have a hope, they were certain that we were all girls (oh, come on, you can't be serious!). Zola was having great fun taunting and teasing them while we 'girls' stood there with silly grins on our faces.
Eventually, Zola declared, "I suppose that I will just have to tell you then, won't I?"
But a man came forward and spoke to the crowd, "We all enjoyed that, didn't we?"
There were "Yea's" and more applause.
"Why don't we ask them to perform for us again at Louise's eighteenth birthday party next month? We can keep the secret until then and have another go at guessing."
"Great idea."
"Sounds terrific."
The man motioned for Zola to lean down and speak with him. "Don't you dare, Zola," was my immediate thought.
Whisperings, grins, head nods, then Zola straightened up with, "Okay, Uncle Horace, I'll put it to them."
Chapter 3: trapped
Back up in our 'dressing room' - a large upstairs bedroom - and Zola explained, "Louise is Uncle Horace's daughter. He is the richest one in the family so you can be sure that the party will be an even more elaborate affair."
"Zola, we're finished, it's over," I declared a little too loudly.
"Calm down, Kylie. Don't get you're knickers in a twist. I've not made any commitments, but it's only fair that I put his proposal to all of you."
I sighed.
"For you guys to do the same act at Louise's party, Uncle will pay each of you two thousand dollars."
"What!!!!"
Then, "Come on, let's do it"
"You bet."
"Two thousand bucks!"
Now, myself and one of the other girls, Styne, were in comfortable circumstances, so the money was nice, but not too big a deal. However, for the other three, it was.
"You can get someone else to take my place," I stated flatly.
"Oh, Kylie, no."
"Please."
Styne was a sensible girl. She looked at me with a small smile, "Kylie, you're the star, the centrepiece. We can't replace you."
"Please, Kylie," the other three girls were pleading.
Trapped again. Zola was just grinning at me. If I ever survived this nightmare, I was going to strangle that girl.
Chapter 4: Uncle Horace, aka bastard!
We had to keep practising to ensure that we didn't lose our form. I accepted my fate and tried to relax. I suppose it was sorta fun. The girls were . . . well, great really, and that helped a lot.
As predicted by Zola, Louise's party was a very fancy affair; held in the grounds of this bloody great mansion. We all got dressed at Zola's house and then went to the party in this luxurious stretched limo (hired by Uncle Horace).
Again we impressed the partygoers, and again they couldn't pick the non-girl. This was getting ridiculous.
This time Uncle Horace got us to circulate among the guests. Thank God Styne stayed with me and helped me survive.
Yep, I survived. Still no one picked me out. There were lots of wild guesses of course, but the only consensus was that we were all girls. Zola was having to defend her veracity.
"I swear to you that one of them is a boy," she was yelling.
Then Uncle Horace had a new idea. "I heard a lot of you saying that if Aunt Wesley was here, she would know immediately. Now unfortunately, Aunt couldn't come because of the state of her health, but what about I send the girls to visit her."
"Yeah, she'll be able to tell."
"Go for it."
No bloody way. I was now including this Uncle Horace in my murder plot.
Zola was grinning at me again, "I have to tell them, Kylie."
We were back at her place and I was glowering at her.
"Aunt Wesley lives out of town in a delightful old house with beautiful gardens. She has people to look after her and Uncle Horace is going to organise for us to go there for lunch. It's a two hour drive, but quite pleasant. Of course, we will go in the limo. Girls, it really would be a lovely outing."
"No, no, no," was resounding in my head.
"Uncle Horace is becoming quite caught up in this whole thing. He's offering a further two thousand dollars to each of you for doing the visit."
The other girls were around me in an instant.
"Oh, Kylie, please say yes."
"You're one of us."
"We love you."
Fuck, fuck, fuck. I wondered how many years I would get for a double murder.
Chapter 5: Aunt Wesley
We weren't going to wear our dance dresses for the visit. Zola got the dressmaker around again and suddenly we had all these casual clothes suitable for teenage girls - three different outfits for each of us!
"Girls, take them home and pick the one you want for our visit tomorrow" Zola declared smiling.
Styne stuck by me again.
"Kylie, I think you should wear this one. Bring it around to my place in the morning and I'll get you set up properly."
Okay, Zola was right again. It was a pleasant drive (the six of us in the stretched limo) and the house and grounds were an absolute delight.
Aunt Wesley was a stern-faced old woman confined to a wheelchair, but there was nothing wrong with her wits. She invited us to explore the gardens and the house.
It was fun.
We had lunch on the terrace, a lovely spread. I couldn't help it, I was enjoying myself as we all were. Then Aunt Wesley spoke in her firm voice.
"Girls, Zola assures me that one of you is actually a boy dressed up. If I wasn't certain that my grand niece would not dare lie to me, I would not believe it. Thus, I am forced to make a decision. Kylie, I'm not sure why, but you are my choice."
"Oh, thank God, at last," I beamed, "You are right. I will show you."
I leapt up and ran around to stand in front of her. My first thought was to expose my flat chest to her, but impulsively I lifted up my mini-skirt and pulled my panties down to expose my 'manhood' to her.
The stern old face twitched into a smile, "Thank you, Kylie, you have reassured me."
We were fooling around and being silly in the limo on the way home. I was feeling a great sense of relief, but also something else. I mean, it had been fun. In fact, a real lot of fun. Maybe I was going to miss it, miss the girls, the camaraderie. But it was over, finished.
"I presume, Zola, that your Aunt will tell Uncle Horace who will let the rest of the family know."
Zola pulled a face, "I'm not so sure actually."
What??????
"It's not obvious, but Aunt Wesley can be a bit of a scamp. She quite enjoys a joke. I wouldn't put it past her to tell Uncle Horace that she had managed to pick the right one and had seen the evidence confirming that one of you is a boy, but then tell him that he would have to work out for himself."
I didn't know whether to laugh or cry.
Chapter 6: it went on
The next do (I was pressured into it again) was six weeks later, back at Uncle Horace's - a pool party with a mere sixty or so people there. But we wouldn't have to dance this time; instead we were to be hostesses, serving out the food and drink and generally looking after the needs of the guests. Of course, we would get another two grand each.
"Bring your swimmers, I want you all to get into the pool later on," Uncle Horace had said.
"Zola, I can't cope with this."
"You'll be right, Kylie. I've found a special shop we can go to that will fix you up. We'll go straight from school tomorrow. Styne's going to drive us."
Styne, who was four months older than me, had just turned seventeen and got her drivers licence.
The 'special shop' catered for crossdressers and transgenders. I didn't want to go in, but they dragged me in. What could I do? Oh, lord, just accept your fate, Kylie.
The woman - I think she was a woman - who assisted us was terrific. She fitted me with stick-on fake boobs, using waterproof make-up to cover over the seams. Shit, they looked so real.
A special TG one-piece swimsuit that held my penis and balls back out of the way. Again, the result was quite remarkable - you just couldn't tell - my front now looked like a girl's.
A couple of pairs of TG panties as well that worked the same way.
The woman was giving me tips and advice, "Come back anytime, love. I'll be happy to help you all I can."
"Thank you," Styne responded, far too willingly to my mind, "We'll bring her back next week."
"Zola, this stuff is pretty expensive," I protested.
"Don't worry, I've got carte blanche. My father's in on the joke. Uncle Horace is his elder brother and he's delighted to have one over him for a change."
Oh, my sainted aunt, when was this ever going to end?
The whole lot of us went off to the dressmakers (yeah, me dressed as Kylie) to select and get fitted with our hostess outfits.
"Kylie, we'd better get your ears pierced. You can just let the holes close up later if you want to."
"Your hair's long enough now, that's good," (the girls had insisted I let it grow).
"We can't risk your wig when you're in the pool, so on the morning of the party we'll get your hair coloured and styled to look the same as your wig did. You can just let it go back afterwards."
I think the fight had gone out of me.
Chapter 7: the pool party
I have to admit it, the party was great fun. The joke seemed to have taken on the status of legend; I think most people no longer wanted the secret revealed.
As we moved around among the guests doing our hostess duties, we 'girls' were playing it up: pretending to give hints, leading people on. But as before, nobody had a clue.
Then Uncle Horace announced that the girls would be getting in the pool. He clearly saw this as the acid test - the 'girl boy' would not be able to maintain his disguise in the water.
Little did he know that I'd already had a practice run in Zola's pool, and had come through 'unscathed'.
We had a ball in the pool. Playing, laughing, grabbing each other, being stupid.
Uncle Horace threw up his hands, "I give up, I surrender. Tell me please, tell me."
You could say that he fell foul of his own machinations, for the rest of the family started calling out. "No, keep the secret."
"We have to try and work it out for ourselves."
'Leave it as it is."
Poor Uncle Horace (but serves the bugger right) it was to be more than five years before he was finally told.
Chapter 8: eventually . . .
Over the intervening years, we 'girls' gave further performances on a number of occasions for the family. The result was always the same, they couldn't work it out and the legend rolled on.
I no longer made any protest. Frankly, I enjoyed it enormously when we all got together. It was a great joke and we always had heaps of fun.
Yet, there was another development, that to me was far more important: I was falling in love, and wonderfully, so was she.
Styne and I went to visit Uncle Horace shortly after we'd got back from our honeymoon. I went as Kylie. I still had to show him the 'physical evidence' before he would believe it.
Styne is married to Kyle, her very definitely male husband, but Kylie still continues to appear quite often. Sometimes just at home for a bit of fun (okay, and for kinky sex). And occasionally Styne and Kylie will go out together, or on a short holiday.
We both enjoy it.