two years ago / summer
-"kashi, i know what i'm doing. just sit back and watch me win." ariana laughed at him, closing the car door. he walked away from her, leaning on his friend's car. accompanied by the people around him, a girl attached at its hip.
ariana gripped the car wheel with every inch of strength she had. it comforted her. the harder she gripped it, the more control she felt she had. ariana watched as the flag girl fixed her hair, the anticipation grew. she looked to the side, three more cars beside hers. eager to win, eager for the money.
ariana let her car purr watching the girl lift the flag, slamming her hand down as quick as possible. ariana slammed her foot of the gas, pressing her back to the seat. she took a look beside her, no car beside her. she was first.
that's everything ariana remembers. next thing she knew she was back in takashi's garage. damp gauze sitting on her forehead, tools on the glass table in front of her.
-"takashi? morimoto?" ariana called out, standing up. she regretted immediately, her vision almost turning fully black. she sat back down. both of the boys came out of the office, laughter erupting as soon as they saw her. she became self conscious.
-"i told you, you weren't ready. you lost control of the car." morimoto said handing her a glass of water and removing the gauze from her head. a deep; but small, cut near her hairline. she watched how takashi had a smug look on his. as if he was happy she got hurt. of course he wasn't. but life just keep proving that ariana should listen to takashi. he always seemed to me right.
-"spare me the 'i told you so' speech, please. i don't need more of a headache." ariana said drinking the water. takashi chuckle at her.
-"i told you." takashi said. she rolled her eyes at him. getting up from the couch. she grabbed his car keys from the table. turning his hand open and giving it to him. she grabbed the same hand dragging him towards the exit.
-"what are you doing?" takashi asked laughing.
-"you're taking me home. if i have to suffer i'd rather suffer in my bed." ariana said, opening the door to the passenger. leaning the seat all the way back, using her forearm to cover her eyes from the sunlight. takashi sighed before starting the car.
...
he seemed serious. that wasn't usual when it came to ariana. sure, he had his moments. but she couldn't possibly imagine what he wanted to talk about. ariana was filled with adrenaline, her heart skipped faster each time.
-"what's wrong, takashi?" ariana could feel han's presence behind her. he followed her every move. ariana swallowed the lump on her throat. she had a bad feeling.
-"it's about your mom." takashi said his eyes on the floor. ariana breath hitched. she wasted no time in asking. her mother was the only family she had left. it had been her and her mother against the world, for as long a she knew.
-"what's wrong with my mom?" ariana asked, desperate. she stepped closer to takashi, tears forming in her eyes.
-"she left." takashi said, putting a hand on her shoulders. ariana scoffed, pushing his hand away.
-"what do you mean she left takashi?" ariana asked stearnly, stepping closer.
-"my uncle will break your father out of prison in a few days. he plans to come back here, to tokyo. your mother left to south korea as soon as she heard the news. i'm sorry." takashi apologized as if it was his own fault. her mother wouldn't have left without saying anything. wouldn't have left without her. ariana took a moment without speaking, han's hand on her shoulder.
-"she wouldn't have left without me, without saying anything. that's not like her. what did you do?" ariana shove him back as hard as she could, tears making her vision blurry. she yelled at him.
-"i didn't do anything. it's not my fault you have a shitty mom." takashi said, fed up quickly. he looked back at han before getting into his car and leaving. ariana stood in her place, anger consuming her. moments of silence went by, han not sure what to say.
-"ariana." han called, slowly stepping towards her. turning her towards him. she had a confused look on her face, she tried to put the pieces of the puzzle together. ariana looked back at him, a tear rolling down her eye. she looked at the car beside her, taking the keys from han's pocket. she wiped the tears on her face.
-"what are you doing?" han followed her into the car, getting on the seat next to her.
-"i need to see for myself." ariana huffed, slamming the door shot.
...
she had to admit she wasn't surprised. she always felt like a burden to her mom. as if the only reason she stayed was because she was a child. her mother often couldn't deal with the pressure of having to take care of ariana. ariana grew up at an early age. learning to not only take care of herself, but of her mother. even before moving to tokyo, ariana became the adult. she'd pay the bills, cleaned up her mother's messes. she'd work her ass off handling cars just to be able to buy her mother's drugs. just to be able to go to school, just to ensure that she had a life for herself. a life she started making in tokyo.
still, she had hope for more. if it was for her mom, she would like to believe that she'd flee in a heartbeat. leave tokyo behind, leave her friends behind, leave han behind. she'd take care of her mother. they would start some place new; she'd be the new girl again. finding a job in a garage, settling down, and becoming a local.
this time was different. it wasn't just about being with her mother, it was about leaving everything ariana cared for. she couldn't do that. she wasn't a child anymore. she didn't plan to run away from her father anymore, she was tired of running. her mom knew ariana was good on her own. ariana could handle herself.
ariana's body froze as soon as she entered the living room/ the dark blue couch cushions were ripped open and left scattered all over the floor. han took a few steps ahead of her, hearing glass crunch under his shoe. he lifted a broken lamp off of the floor, placing it on top of the empty couch. ariana walked over to the kitchen. broken dishes all over the place.
-"ari." han called for her, standing next to the broken side table in the living room. ariana walked over to him, sighing at the sight of him. he held a small plastic bag with white powder in it. she knew she wouldn't have to explain what the substance was.
-"since when does your mom do drugs?" han asked. grabbing her hand, bringing her closer. ariana scoffed in response.
-"since forever." ariana ran her hands down her hair, pulling it away from her scalp. she looked around the room on last time.
-"she really did it this time. i never thought she would be able to leave without me." ariana said. it was a bittersweet feeling. she felt a sort of relief, she was finally able to settle down. she could stop worrying about running. she could just keep still, but it was her mom. the only family she had left. she felt tears threating to spill, she attempted to blink them away.
han snaked his arm around her back, pulling her close. he hugged her head close to his chest; she could hear his heartbeat.
-"what are you going to do?" han asked, ariana felt the vibration of his voice in her chest. he felt her tense.
-"continue my life? i don't know. i don't want anything to change. i've been running away for so long, i don't want to run anymore." ariana responded, looking up at him. han nodded at her, leaving her embrace. he brushed his hand against her cheek, wiping away stray ears on her face.
-"stay in the garage, you can have my room." han said, brushing the hair out of her face. she nodded in response. han led her towards the door, he stepped out first. she looked back before following his footsteps.
...
ariana knocked on han's door, pulling the backpack over her chest tighter. after a while she went back up. she packed enough so that she wouldn't need to go back, at least for a while. her backpack across her chest, a suitcase in one hand. she watched han open the door. he took the suitcase of her hands, rolling it towards the middle of the room. ariana placed the backpack in a corner of the room, putting her hair in a ponytail.
-"i bet you're tired. i'll sleep downstairs." han said, making his way towards the door. ariana tugged at his hand, holding him back.
-"are you sure? i can sleep downstairs. i don't want to make you leave your own room." ariana said.
-"it's okay, i'll be downstairs if you need anything." han said, placing his hand on the doorknob. looking back at her.
-"thank you, han." ariana said, han nodded at her before closing the door. ariana looked around the room, she was familiar with it. it wasn't her first time there. she sat down on the bed. not processing everything that happened just yet.