ᖴOᖇ TᕼE ᑭᗩST few weeks, I awakened each day only to remember that I was alone in the grand-sized bed made for two people. This morning, however, I feel the warmth of long arms wrapped around me under the covers. I hear the soft breath of sleep that belongs to someone other than myself, their chest rising and falling with mine. I smell the familiar scent of a winter forest and pine trees. When my lashes flitter open, shimmering quartz eyes stare back at me.
"Good morning, Aleksander," I sigh, nuzzling my face into his neck. I try to close my eyes and go back to sleep, but he makes a quick shift, rolling on top of me. His mouth peppers me with kisses in my most ticklish spots to ensure I stay awake. He kisses my cheeks, my forehead, my jaw, my neck, and back up until he reaches my ear, nibbling it playfully. A giddy laugh sounds from my throat.
"Okay, okay. I'm awake!" I giggle as he bites where the sensitive flesh of my neck meets my shoulder. "That better not leave a mark. I don't want to have to tell Amelia that I got bit by a vampire again."
The vibration of his warm chuckle sends a shiver down my back. He bites harder earning a gasp from me. "I want everyone to know that I am yours," he says.
"I think that's what the wedding rings are for." I hold up my ring that has a diamond in the center held in by a golden sun interlocked with a black steel moon.
He hums and plants a kiss on my neck to soothe the red imprint he left. It definitely left a mark. . .
"I suppose I should catch up on the work that I put aside before dust bunnies form on the papers piling up on my desk," I sigh.
"Or we can spend today together instead," Aleksander suggests.
I gape at him, silently wondering who this man is and where he put my husband. "You've never been one to put off work before," I say skeptically.
His fingers brush through my tangled mess of white hair for a minute before he says, "I've learned that some things are more important."
My lips curl up into a smile. "Like what?"
"Well yesterday, Amelia was quite excited about the Cold Moon festival. It sounded like something you would enjoy as well if you'd like to come."
"I think the Cold Moon festival came to Keramzin once or twice while I was at the orphanage. Mal and I snuck away to go."
Aleksander doesn't even flinch when I say Mal's name anymore. He has accepted that Mal was a significant part of my past and that he will always be my first love as Luda is to Aleksander.
"Is that a yes?" he smirks.
"Yes."
"Good," he grins.
"So," I bite my lip, hoping I am not pushing my luck by asking, "Does this mean you will let me leave the palace when I want to without having to tell you?"
A long breath of air leaves his lungs, thinking about how to answer. I prepare for him to form a negation, but then he takes me by surprise. "I would still like to know where you are going," he says, "but if you prefer not to tell me. . . I promise to respect it. And I will nonetheless request that you are regarding your safety when you leave, but yes, you can travel wherever your heart is content. Within reason."
I can't help the wide smile that is plastered to my face. I kiss him over and over again until we are both dizzy with delight. A weight has been lifted from my chest. For so long, I felt trapped within the walls of the Grand Palace, but now I have been given my freedom. No more shackles or locked bedroom doors.
"I'm glad to see you happy, my Alina," he says with a joyful tone, but through the tether, I sense a certain uneasiness.
"Don't worry," I whisper against his cheek before placing a tender kiss there. "I won't run off the second I get a chance."
Aleksander's muscles untense after I reassure him, but there is still something bothering him. "What's the matter?" I inquire.
I can see him struggling to explain his emotions with the raging war inside his enigmatic mind. Being with him for this long has helped me see through his calculated responses and protective barricade. Slowly but surely, his walls are coming down around me, but he still needs help sometimes with not crushing his emotions down into a dark place for no one to see.
"I want you to promise me something," he says at last. Aleksander remains on top of me, arms caging me in, looking down at me with those eyes that still make my heart skip a beat when they stray to me.
"Okay." My throat bobs up and down.
"Promise me that you will love me, even if I am not entitled to your love, no matter how many mistakes I make."
"I thought you didn't make mistakes," I smile, remembering our conversation when we first met.
He remembers it too and quotes himself. "I do. Just not often."
My smile falters and I feel a harsh wave of guilt crash down on me. I forgot that while we were quarreling, I told him that I did not love him. I do! I do love him. Aleksander may still struggle with his morality, and what he did to me was not okay, but while he was hurting, I pulled away from him. Neither of us were without fault. We both certainly have more learning to do, but that's alright. That is what relationships are.
"I'm sorry," I lament. A woeful tear trickles down my cheek. "I love you, Aleksander. I love you."
"I know," he coos softly. "I know."
"No," I say, shaking my head. "I don't think you know how much I love you. I promise to tell you every hour of every day if that's what it takes. I love you, Aleksander Morozova." His brows raise in surprise, and he finally understands how much I mean it when I say, "I love you."
"And I love you, Alina Morozova, for all of eternity."
"For all of eternity," I return. Aleksander buries his face in my neck as we hold each other in a tight embrace. I keep whispering "I love you," while it is muffled by his shoulder pressed against me. And I will continue to tell him for as long as he needs.
I love you.
***
Amelia is practically bouncing off of the carriage walls by the time we see the festival out the window. Her eyes widen to the size of dinner plates as she stays glued to the window. She is much like me in the respects of not being experienced in exploring the outside world. Hopefully that will all change now.
It makes me smile to see the exuberance on Amelia's face. Her breath spreads across the cold glass, making it fogged up with every exhale. Aleksander shares my joy as he, too, watches Amelia from the other seat. I would be lying if I said I wasn't quite excited myself. I watch the lines of stalls, extending three street blocks in length, get closer and closer. They seem to have every baked good and fresh product imaginable. The Cold Moon festival stopped a few years ago because of the war and blockades that hindered imports and exports, but now that we share resources with the Shu, we can get fresh exotic fruit and more sugar for our tea than before.
I hear the galloping hooves of the horses slow to a leisurely trot, indicating our arrival. Mere seconds after the carriage comes to a stop, the door bursts open and an eager eight-year-old comes tumbling out, her curls bouncing in a mess of tangles because she refuses to let us brush her hair. Aleksander beckons her, urging her to stay close. Amelia turns on her heels and races back to hold my hand because she has learned what happens when she tests her father's patience.
The three of us walk hand in hand, our cloaks dragging behind us in a pool of luxurious black fabric. So much for discreetness, I think to myself. I used to hate wearing the Darkling's color. It made me feel like he owned me as if he was a slaver and I his deliberate servant, but now the color makes me feel whole. It represents the unity of us and our little family. I'm not sure that is how others perceive it, however. To them, it might look like a bright-colored lure in the water, something to attack and swallow whole.
"Shouldn't we be wearing something a bit more... inconspicuous for walking in public with hundreds of other people?" I ask. "What happened to being safe out in the open?"
Amelia bounces up and down in a skipping rhythm as I hold her hand, completely ignoring our conversation.
"It would be fatuous to disguise ourselves in different clothes. The people who are a threat to us already know what we look like, so we will be better off showing that we are not hiding away in fear."
I grumble quietly, but I know Aleksander is right. Showing fear is what gives an enemy motivation. If he knows how to do anything perfectly, it's being able to predict an opponent's next move like a game of chess that he always seems to win.
The first fete stall at the festival is stocked full of all kinds of bread, one that happens to be garlic butter rolls. I look down to find Amelia practically vibrating with excitement. I hand her a few coins and she shoots forward like a pinball machine. I giggle at her and then take Aleksander's hand in my own, lacing our fingers together. His guard is up since we are in public, but I see a ghost of a smile curl his lips.
We walk over to the bread stand to take the bag of bread away from Amelia before she eats it all in one sitting, though she has already stuffed one in her mouth by the time we get there.
She laughs with her mouth crammed full of bread. Amelia's cheeks are as protruded as a chipmunk, especially when she smiles. She spots something shiny and runs off to the next fete stall. After I advise at her to stay close, I look back at Aleksander who is gazing right at me with glimmering grey eyes.
"What?" I ask with a bashful laugh.
He smirks and pulls me closer by wrapping his arm around my waist snugly. Aleksander says, "Nothing. I'm just glad to see you by my side with that beautiful smile of yours."
I blush at his compliment and look to the side. When I do, I feel an intense gaze aimed at me and immediately spot a pair of icy light blue eyes starting at me through the crowd. Morozova.
A familiar smile forms on his lips as he looks back at me through the crowd. I've seen that smile on Aleksander. On Baghra. A smile that shows ancient fatigue and corrosion of their mortal selves that died eons ago. Luckily, I've been able to salvage Aleksander's true smile and that human part of him, but Baghra is far too stubborn to let me into her cold heart.
"What is it?" Aleksander asks, trying to follow my diverted attention.
When my eyes dart from Aleksander back to where I was looking before, no ice-colored eyes or weary smile present themselves as if he was never there at all.
"N–Nothing," I stumble over my words. "I thought I saw something. . ."
He looks at me with suspicion, but chooses not to press on. I take his hand and guide him over to the current stall Amelia is infatuated with in an attempt to distract him. It works for the most part. The stall has hand-stitched stuffed animals. The elderly woman running the stand holds out her calloused hand for money. I am confused at first until I round the stand to find Amelia clinging to a large blue stuffed elephant with a death grip. I have the premonition that she will not let go of this toy until we pry it from her fingers.
I sigh and look over to Aleksander who is already dropping coins into the old woman's palm.
"When did you get to be such an expensive child," Aleksander asks.
She ignores his question and jumps with joy. The stuffed elephant's head and trunk flop up and down in her arms as she hops around.
"Thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!" Amelia yells with excitement.
Aleksander chuckles and says, "You're welcome, Little One."
She runs back to us, toy in hand, and holds his hand while he holds me on the other side of him. Together, we walk down the cobblestone path of the festival and I feel whole again. When I fight with Aleksander, I feel like my heart is ripped to pieces and in the future we will still argue I'm sure, but I have a sneaking suspicion that this was the worst of the storm.
I look up at the unusually clear blue winter sky with an alleviating sigh. The chilled air gently brushes across my face.
We walk hand in hand as a family, as one. Amelia and Aleksander—they are my universe. Through all of our moments together, good and bad, they will always be my whole world, the ones I will fight for until my heart gives out, until I have no more breaths to breathe.
My family, my universe, my love. For all eternity.
__________
I thought it was past due for a solely happy, romantic chapter. Nothing bad happening to our favorite couple this time. No cliffhanger. Just love. 💕