I've almost fallen off this rickety, old wooden step stool three times already, but when I cap the red expo marker and lean back to get a better look at the finished specials board that I just decorated, I know that it was worth it.
The huge whiteboard hanging on the wall behind the bar top at Over Easy is a new addition, but since our specials change every week with a new USW theme, decorating it has quickly become my favorite part of my job.
This week's theme is centered around the football team who are set to play their first game this Saturday. I wasn't scheduled to work tonight, but when Nancy, the diner's owner, texted me that Kelsey called out last minute and she was in dire need of another waitress for the closing shift, I couldn't say no. I would have come in to help anyway because I adore Nancy, but the fact that I need to start saving up for my plane ticket to see my parents this Christmas also helped convince me. I see them two or three times a year, usually for a few weeks at a time, but even though it's been almost four years since they made the move to Italy, I'm still getting used to them not being in Winter Hill for holidays.
I was supposed to move with them when my dad received his job offer. It wasn't even a question, especially since I was still a sophomore in high school. But after crying for three weeks straight before we were set to leave, Halle and I devised a plan for me to stay — for me to move in with her moms and finish up school here. I wasn't expecting my parents to agree. I was already planning on crying the entire plane ride there, and for however long my body would produce tears after that, but after my parents sat down with Halle's moms' for a few hours to work out the logistics, they reluctantly agreed to let me stay. I think it was partially because my dad didn't know how long-term his new art curator position would hold, and if they were going to end up moving back in a few months anyway, it might be better for me to stay. But those few months turned into years, and now, four years later, he's the senior museum curator of one of the largest art museums in southern Italy.
I spend all my summers with them unless they opt to come here instead like they did this year, and most holidays, if I can afford it. They offer to pay for my flight every time, but I can't help but feel guilty accepting that money because the ticket isn't cheap, and I know it's an expense they wouldn't have to worry about if I had just gone with them. Which is why I have to start saving now.
"That looks amazing, Jo." Lacie's voice pulls my attention away from the sign. She's grinning up at me as she finishes mopping the floors near the back tables. We're still two hours away from closing, but Thursday nights are notorious for being slow, so we usually cheat the system a little and start our closing tasks early.
"I could shade it properly to give it more dimension." I consider the board for a second before capping the marker and stepping down the stool. Nancy probably wouldn't appreciate me spending that much of my shift working on this display board. When I reach up to drop the marker in the basket under the board, I wince as a dull throb aches deep in my shoulder.
It's been almost a week since Aaron Penn shot me, but the bruise he left on my shoulder is still a dark collage of purples, blues, and blacks. I'm almost tempted to use the bag of frozen strawberries that we keep in the freezer for smoothies as an icepack, but I know I'd just end up snacking on them, so it would kind of defeat the purpose.
"Alright, I'm heading out," Lacie calls, stashing the mop back into the supply closet before ducking down and grabbing her purse from under the bar top. I glance back at the clock and frown when I realize it's already ten minutes past the end of her shift. The diner is a ghost town, so I know the next hour of my shift will probably be spent cleaning menus and rolling cutlery sets. When she catches my dramatic frown, she laughs, stopping at the diner door.
"You're working game day with me, right?"
I nod, smiling at the relief flooding her face. The football game this weekend is a home game, which means most of the student body will be getting drunk beyond belief at the tailgate. Those who weren't lucky enough to secure tickets before the game sold out will likely flood the diner to watch it on our five flat screens while they take advantage of the bottomless wings and fries special I just decorated the board to advertise.
Game days are undeniably torturous for us, but they're decidedly less miserable when we're working them together.
"I'll see you Saturday, then." She flashes a smile before walking out, keeping her head down as she runs through the drizzle of rain just starting to pour down from the black sky above.
I survey the empty diner, popping up on my tiptoes to peer over to the back tables and booths. The restaurant is completely empty, and thanks to Lacie, the back half has already been closed up, fully wiped down, and mopped.
Lugging the colossal stack of laminated menus up onto the bar top, I grab a few sanitizing wipes from the container and start wiping them down. I'm a quarter of the way through the stack when the bell above the door rings out as two people rush through, hurrying out of the rain now pelting down. I catch the white-blonde top knot first and smile when Halle looks from her rain-soaked tweed mini skirt to the raindrops sliding down her knee-high boots, horror-stricken. Her black turtle neck is clinging to her body as she trudges forward, dropping her phone and keys onto the bar top as she takes a seat with a defeated sigh.
"I forgot my umbrella."
Liv grins, not seeming to mind the rain soaking her black baseball hat as she slides into the seat beside Halle, dropping her own phone and keys onto the bar top. Her black Nike jacket is zipped halfway, revealing the matching sports bra underneath as she tugs at the short hem of her spandex shorts, the flush of volleyball practice still coloring her tanned cheeks. Looking around the diner, her brows raise as she asks, "You're still open, right? We're not too late to order?"
I laugh, nodding as I slide a clean menu in front of both of them. "We're open for —" I glance over my shoulder at the clock. "An hour and forty-eight more minutes. Thursday nights are just dead for some reason."
I grab two glasses and start pouring Halle's drink. She's ordered the same drink every time we've gone out since we were twelve — an unsweetened iced tea with two lemon wedges. When I place it in front of her, she smiles up at me as she sticks her straw in and takes a long sip. Liv orders her usual Diet Coke, and by the time I place it in front of her, Halle slides her menu back toward me, ready to order.
"The club sandwich, please."
"No mayo, extra tomato," I finish for her, underlining no mayo on my order pad before glancing up to see her smile in confirmation.
"Grilled chicken with the steamed veggie medley, please." Liv decides with a resigned sigh. Her eyes are locked on the desserts page, longingly staring down the triple dipper as she slides her menu back to me.
Walking back to the kitchen, I hand off the order sheet to Mickey with a smile. He looks relieved to finally have an order. Looking around the kitchen, I have a feeling he's been spot cleaning for the past hour, bored out of his mind since he's the only cook scheduled tonight. Sometimes I'll come back here and hang out with him when we're dead. When we're really, really slow, he'll even make us some cajun seasoned fries to snack on while we inconspicuously watch TV shows on his phone. I don't even want to think about what Nancy would do if she knew we were two seasons deep into Hell's Kitchen.
When I walk back out, Halle's shaking her head. "Trust me, you wouldn't like any of them. All the guys in my pre-med program are arrogant assholes who try to mansplain things to me all day as if I'm not doing better than all of them in class. Like excuse me, Mitchell, but I'm not the one who failed the last test. I don't need you to improperly explain respiratory functions to me."
Halle's lips perk up when Liv raises her glass of Diet Coke in a silent toast to that, and then both of them grin at me when I pick up the sanitizing wipe and start cleaning the menus again.
"How's work been?" Halle asks, stealing one of my sanitizing wipes to wipe down the next menu in the stack.
"Pretty much exactly like this." I motion toward the empty diner. "It's been quiet all night, so I've been cleaning and decorating the specials board since I got here."
Liv leans over the counter, swiping the wet wipe container and a small stack of dirty menus. "Is that Oregon's mascot?" She grins, admiring my colorful illustration hanging under the Over Easy neon sign behind the bar top. It's casting a red glow on the whiteboard, coincidentally enhancing the comically morbid vibe of the drawing.
"Too much?" I ask, surveying the board with an amused smile. Our beloved USW Warrior mascot is standing proudly over the Oregon Duck, his foot resting triumphantly on the Duck's back while he cradles a football to his armor-plated chest. I added the Duck sipping on a milkshake from his spot on the ground to lighten the mood while also advertising the milkshake special for game days, but now it just kind of looks like he's enjoying being stepped on.
"No, it's perfect." Liv's laugh echoes softly through the diner but is cut off quickly with a wince.
Halle and I both turn to look at her, but she just leans over, laying her head down on the bar top with a strained moan. "I'm so sore. We didn't even touch a ball today. It was straight conditioning. I don't know what hurts more — my legs or my abs."
"Must be nice to have abs. What's that like?" Halle asks, meeting my amused gaze.
"I wouldn't know," Liv mutters back, her cheek still pressed against the counter. "I can never seem to build them. I've been trying for three months."
"I don't even want abs. I just want some boobs," I grumble, pulling a new wipe from the container and scrubbing a menu with pancake syrup smeared across the back.
"No, you don't. They're overrated," Halle counters.
Liv nods in agreement. "All they do is make running harder."
"I'd take that over looking like a preteen for the rest of my life." I groan.
"You could always get on birth control," Halle suggests. "There's a good chance you'll go up a cup size, maybe even two."
My hand freezes mid-swipe on the menu. I haven't thought about it until now, but now that Micah and I are officially friends with benefits, is birth control something I should be looking into? I mean, I'm not planning on having sex any time soon, but if there's even a small chance that it might happen, I should probably make an appointment.
Just to be safe, right?
When I look back up, both of them are smiling at me.
"What?" I ask, looking between them.
"Speaking of birth control...spill it, Josie Cat. I want all the salacious details. Starting with the borderline pornographic photo booth pictures and ending with the bear." Halle's smirk deepens as she crosses her right leg over her right and takes a sip of her tea.
"I don't know what you're talking about," I say as innocently as I can, but I can't hold back my incriminating smile, so I collect the stacks of clean menus in my arms and turn around, placing them in their designated spot beside the much smaller pile of kids menus.
I knew this was coming. Halle texted me earlier asking to borrow my phone charger, which would have been fine, except I didn't think about the fact that my sketchbook was on my nightstand with the very incriminating photo booth pictures peeking out of it. The first photoset was innocent enough, just a few funny poses and a simple kiss, but the second photoset was something else entirely. Something that made me wish we would have spent a little more time in there tucked away alone in the middle of that busy fairground.
The first picture was of him smirking up at me as I smiled down at him, which was probably the exact moment that we both agreed to be friends with benefits. The four subsequent pictures showed the progression of our heated make out, starting with his hands clutching my thighs and ending with those hands traveling up until they were grabbing my butt while my fingers knotted in his soft hair.
I'm honestly shocked Halle contained herself as much as she did after finding them. I was cleaning my paintbrushes in the campus art studio when her texts vibrated in the front pocket of my paint-stained apron. I had to wash my hands three times to get most of the paint off, and when I finally pulled my phone out, three texts were waiting for me. They were short, simple, and enough for me to know that she had found the pictures.
Halle: Oh, my fucking God.
Halle: Josephine Julieta Guerrero.
Halle: I am so proud of you. He's so hot. I need all the details.
And then a few minutes later — a picture of Winnie sitting on my bed.
Halle: Who's the new roomie?
I didn't have time to explain. The studio has been in mass chaos since we're knee-deep in projects and portfolio work, so instead of calling her like I usually would have, I sent back a quick I promise I'll explain everything after I get off of work later text, and then went back to smoothing the first coat of bright yellow paint onto my canvas.
But I guess now is later, so when I turn back to them, I shrug as nonchalantly as I can as I reach up and tighten the ribbon holding my hair up.
"We went to the fair," I say, trying to figure out where to even begin. "We rode some rides, played a ton of fair games, ate cotton candy and ice cream, and —" I hesitate, unsure of exactly how much I want to reveal.
I already know that Halle would have an actual heart attack if I told her about the psychic reading. And she'd come back to life just to die a second time if I told her about the twin flames revelation. I genuinely do believe psychics exist, but I also believe there are a lot of fakes out there pretending to be psychic just to scam people — like the lady I went to on my eighteenth birthday. And as fun as it would be to believe that Micah Costa and I are somehow cosmically tied together, I highly doubt the lady giving away free readings at a traveling fair is the real deal.
But I don't know if Halle Anderson — the astrology queen herself — would be so quick to see the reality of that. She tends to be a bit too trusting of people, too willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, and it's gotten her hurt more times than not. When she looks up at me, I know it's best to avoid the psychic conversation altogether.
"Then we went into the photo booth and took some pictures, and it kind of turned into a little make out session."
I can tell by the smirk on Olivia's face that Halle has already shown her the pictures, but when her brow perks up, I know that she caught that little lie.
It definitely wasn't a little make out session.
It was the kind of make out session that kept me up that entire night, just to replay it over and over and over again in my head. Just to fantasize about how good his calloused fingers felt slowly brushing up the side of my thighs. About how my stomach tightened into an excited knot when he grabbed my butt and lifted me to reposition my legs, so I was straddling his lap while his other hand cupped my neck, brushing his thumb across the soft line of my jaw. My entire body heats at the memory of how sweet his cookie dough tongue tasted as he explored my mouth, and the rush of warmth that pools between my thighs at the thought of him pulling my bottom lip between his teeth spikes my heart rate.
Micah wasn't my first kiss, but looking back now, none of them even compare because no one has ever come close to kissing me the way Micah Costa does.
It's not just a kiss with him; it's so much more than that. My entire body floods with adrenaline every time his hand cups my neck, tilting my head back to bring my lips closer to his. And even with my heart racing in my chest, all I can ever focus on is how his eyes always darken, just a little, as they dip down to watch my lips part slightly. My entire body flames and the flood of tingles that rush down my arms, chest, legs, and spine are a reminder that somehow, Micah Costa sends every nerve in my body into high alert. Like each one is eagerly waiting for his hands to brush up my thighs, or his fingers to tighten on my waist, or most of all, for his lips to finally part my own so his tongue can explore my mouth.
It's all-encompassing, it's intoxicating, and suddenly, all I can think about is tasting him again.
"Jo?"
I look up from the bar top to see them staring at me expectantly.
"Sorry, what?" I clear my throat, trying to ignore the burning in my cheeks.
Olivia's lips quirk as she asks, "Then what happened? After the kiss?"
"Oh, um." I shrug as I look between her and Halle. I know they won't judge me for the friends with benefits thing. I mean, Olivia is the most sex-positive person I've ever met in my life. I'm almost a little worried she's going to throw me a Josie is finally — maybe — going to have sex with Micah Costa party after hearing this. But somehow, it still feels weird to say it out loud.
"Well, we kind of agreed to be...friends with benefits."
They're both silent as their jaws drop open, and then, as expected — the explosion.
"Friends with benefits?"
"With Micah Costa?"
"Oh, my God, Jo."
"Did he ask you, or did you ask him?"
"Oh, my God, Jo."
"Oh, my God, Jo."
"Wait." Olivia's eyes widen, and she sits up on her stool. "Have you already slept with him?"
I look at Halle as my cheeks burn a little brighter because I guess now is as good a time as any to tell Olivia that I'm still a virgin.
"No." I shake my head. "I'm still...I've never..."
Olivia's eyes widen a little, and then she blinks a few times as she looks between Halle and me, as if trying to figure out if I'm joking. When she realizes I'm not, she nods.
"Oh, okay. Cool." She smiles and takes a small sip of her Diet Coke, which is honestly one of the calmest reactions I've gotten after sharing that information. Most of the time, it's a little more dramatic, like when I drank for the first time last year and accidentally spilled that information to Lacie and Abby.
I could tell Abby was surprised, but she covered it up pretty well. Lacie, on the other hand, asked a million questions, the most frequent — but why? I know she meant well, but it was still uncomfortable. Thankfully, Abby cut her off pretty quickly and changed the subject before I had to answer anything.
"So is that why you're friends with benefits with Micah then? To have sex?" Olivia asks curiously. There's no judgment in her voice, just curiosity.
The ding of the kitchen bell echoes, signaling that their orders are ready, and as I turn and walk into the back, I consider her question.
Is that why I'm doing this? Do I want to have sex with Micah?
Placing their plates in front of them, I lean my arms against the counter and take a deep breath.
"I don't know," I finally admit. "I always imagined my first time would be with someone that I was with for a long time. Like a boyfriend or fiancé, you know? But lately, I just — I don't think I want to wait for something like that anymore. It just feels like I'm putting off living my life to follow these unspoken rules that I've laid out for myself."
Liv nods as she unwraps the cutlery from her napkin set. "I felt like that, too. My first time was with my high school boyfriend. I was nervous and kind of scared, and to be completely honest, I was only doing it because I felt like it was the next step, you know?" She shrugs and cuts into her grilled chicken. "And when I think back to my time with —" She cuts herself off, her shoulders tightening a little. "To my other experiences — when it wasn't planned or even expected, when it was just the two of us in the moment, just letting things happen naturally...it just felt right."
Looking up, she smiles softly as she says, "If I could go back in time and make that night my first time, I would. It would have been so much better to let myself get lost in a perfect moment with someone I felt that kind of intense connection to, even though we weren't together, rather than a moment that felt so manufactured and stale with someone I had been with for a while."
I want that. The all-consuming, lost in the moment, drunk on each other while the rest of the world slips away kind of sex. Even if it doesn't mean anything. Even if it's just sex. Even if it's just that one time. Even if that's all I'd ever be able to have with Micah.
That's why I'm doing this, right?
To leave behind the what-ifs and how-longs.
To not let the fear of being burned stop me from living.
f there's one thing I can't deny, it's that I've felt more alive with Micah in the past month that I've known him than I have in years. And if I'm being really honest, I don't think I could give that up, even if I wanted to.
"I agree with Liv," Halle says, picking up a fry from her plate. "Micah Costa is guaranteed good sex. Which is great, especially for your first. At least then you wouldn't have a traumatizing mishap like my first time."
I bite down on my lip to keep from laughing, but it doesn't work because Halle's entire face scrunches up at the memory. I will never forget Halle walking into my room in the middle of the night after she got home.
It was the middle of summer right before senior year, and as romantic as losing your virginity surrounded by candles and rose petals, when the guy you're losing it to has no clue what he's doing, it kind of ruins the moment.
"What happened?" Olivia laughs, looking between us.
I try not to laugh, but I can't hold it in when Halle's entire face turns bright pink.
"I'm sworn to secrecy." I shake my head quickly.
I pinky promised Halle I'd never tell anyone, and I intend to keep that promise.
"Halle." Olivia turns toward her with wide eyes. "What the hell happened?"
"I'm trying to block it from my memory." She shakes her head quickly, shoving the fry into her mouth.
"Was he your only one?" Liv asks instead.
Halle's cheeks slowly drain of the bright pink hue as she shakes her head. "No, there was this other guy senior year of high school, a frat boy freshman year of college, and then Bradley."
Halle sounds annoyed when she lists off the last boy on her list. Oh, Bradley.
I try not to laugh again as Liv perks up at that.
"Who's Bradley?"
Halle glances over at me, trying to decide if she wants to talk about it. I shrug and nod encouragingly, mostly because I feel bad that Olivia feels so felt out, especially after she just shared so much with us.
"Bradley Graham..." Halle scrunches her nose again, shaking her head as she tries to explain her relationship with Bradley. "Was a waste of three months of my life last year."
Olivia's lips perk as she looks at me, already sensing the drama that Halle's about to deep dive into. It was dramatic. And honestly, I'm glad Halle is over him because I don't think I could make awkward small talk with that jerk ever again.
"Go on." Olivia grins, taking a sip of her Diet Coke.
"He's just the most arrogant, selfish, conceited..." Halle trails off, trying desperately to think of more adjectives to describe him. "Just absolute fucking douchebag that I've ever met."
Bingo.
"Why did you sleep with him?" Olivia looks confused as she looks between us, but I just roll my eyes and try not to laugh as I listen to how Halle's going to try to explain to Olivia that she's only attracted to assholes without actually saying that.
"I just — he was — we're in the same pre-med classes, and we spent a lot of time paired up last year, and it just kind of happened. We had sex a few times, and then it just kind of kept happening until it became our routine. He'd go to his frat's parties and then come over completely drunk a few times a week."
"For months," I add with a grimace, thinking back to the countless times that I ran into him while he was drunkenly sneaking into our apartment. He knocked over a glass of water on the coffee table during one of his drunken escapades, ruining an entire sketchbook that had the first three pieces for my final project in it.
"Why keep going back to him, though?" Liv's brows knot.
Halle's eyes flick between us, and her lips pull up into a shameless smile. "He had a big dick."
I look over to Liv, and when our eyes meet, we both lose it. That explains a lot, actually.
Halle grins as she brings her sandwich up to her lips. "Not that he knew how to use it."
"Hey, that's better than my ex-boyfriend. I didn't even realize how small Tucker was until I slept with Luke. That was a big difference. And unlike Tucker, he knew exactly what he was doing with it." Liv grins, and I can tell by the way her cheeks warm that she's thinking back to that night in the hotel room.
Halle sighs dramatically. "Well, at least Bradley was good with his hands, so it wasn't a total waste of time."
Liv lifts her drink in a toast to that, and then her gaze flicks over to me.
"How far have you gone, Jo?"
"I had a boyfriend junior year of high school," I say noncommittally, thinking back to the two months that I was with David. We met through a few mutual friends in my AP art class, and while he was sweet, there really wasn't a spark. Although, neither of us paid attention to that when we were kissing in the back seat of his car after school most days.
"We did some stuff," I say awkwardly, glancing between them as I try to figure out how to say it without actually having to say it.
"Hmm," Liv hums as she narrows her eyes at me playfully. "Like this kind of stuff?" She holds her hand up and wiggles her fingers.
Hand stuff, yeah.
"Mhm." I nod, thinking back to the days he would take us back to his house after school while his parents were still at work. I don't think he knew what he was doing because his fingers felt kind of awkward and uncomfortable most of the time, but knowing that his parents could come home from work at any minute was enough of a thrill to spike my adrenaline, and that feeling alone was enough to keep me coming back.
"And what about..." She presses her tongue against the inside of her cheek with a perked brow.
I shake my head. "It never got that far."
"Well, I'm sure Micah's about to change that." She smirks.
I swallow hard at the thought of Micah looking up from between my thighs, but I try to shake the image as my entire face flushes. That familiar knot tightens in my stomach when I think about his tongue slowly sliding across his bottom lip before he dips his head down and uses that expert tongue in ways that I've never experienced before.
My entire body jolts when my phone vibrates in the apron I have tied around my waist. Reading the notification, my face burns even brighter when I realize who the text is from. I slide it open quickly, trying to act as casual as possible so nosy and nosier won't pounce.
Micah: Hey, Melons. I don't know how this whole shared custody thing is supposed to work, but I'm thinking it's my turn to see the bear. Maybe you could drop him off tomorrow at eleven? And then, since you'll already be here, you might as well just stay for the party we're throwing. And if you wanted to stay over after too, I'd be okay with that. You know, since it's my first night with Winnie and everything, might need some help.
I bite down on my lip to keep from smiling like an idiot as I type back my response.
Me: Are you seriously using Winnie just to get me to come over?
I send it and look back up to see Liv and Halle focused on their plates. When my phone vibrates again, I look down to read his new message.
Micah: Maybe. Why? Is it working?
I try to hold back my smile as I type out my response.
Me: Maybe.
Micah: You can bring whoever you want. Just make sure to bring the bear. I'm serious about my custody rights.
I glance up and clear my throat, pulling both girls' attention.
"So...Micah just invited us to a party tomorrow."
As expected, my roommates react in two very different ways. Liv's eyes brighten, and Halle's shoulders slump with a, please don't make me go expression.
"We have to go," Liv argues, staring at Halle like she's crazy for not wanting to come. "We've been in school for almost a month and we haven't gone to a single party together. Come on, Hal, you're never going to find a boyfriend sitting in your room watching Harry Potter every night."
Halle's jaw drops as she feigns offense, but she knows it's true.
"Just think of all of the hot guys that'll be there. Think of all his teammates that will be there."
Halle doesn't look impressed as she stares at Olivia, but when she glances at me, I nod encouragingly, mostly because I really don't want to go to this without her. She looks like she wants to melt and dissolve right into the floor just to get out of this, but when she meets my gaze, and I pout a little, she sighs deeply.
"Fine. But I call dibs on that West guy."
"Deal. I'll text Gracie and see if she wants to go too." Liv beams as she picks up her phone.
I'm about to text back a joke about child support, but Olivia's loud gasp startles me, and I almost drop my phone. When I look up, she's staring wide-eyed at her phone screen.
"What? What's wrong?" I ask, watching her face drain of color.
"I — did he tell you?" She looks up at me, and my chest tightens at the desperate searching look in her glassy eyes.
"Who? Tell me what?"
She hands me her phone, and I stare, unblinking, at Luke's latest Instagram post. It's a picture of him and the girl he was walking out with the other day. The girl that he didn't even look like he liked. He has his arm around her as he smiles for the camera, but his smile looks off, like he's annoyed. Her smile is bright enough for the both of them, though, and she has her hand resting low on his stomach as she leans into him. There's no caption, but he did tag her, so I click on her profile.
My heart sinks into my stomach when I click on her most recent post. It's the same picture Luke just posted, only her caption is a lot more descriptive — @lukemcconnell how does it feel to be locked down, baby? #boyfriend #basketballgirlfriends #WAGS #USW
"What? What's going on?" Halle asks, leaning forward on the bar top as she looks between us with knotted brows.
I look back to Olivia and watch her glossy eyes search mine.
"I didn't know, Liv. I swear."
"Know what? Guys?" Halle presses, even more confused.
"It's Luke. He has a girlfriend now," I say softly as I hand Olivia her phone back.
I can already see her eyes welling, but she swallows hard and blinks a few times, keeping her eyes trained on her hands as she tries to pull herself together.
"It's fine." She shakes her head slowly, but her voice comes out in a hoarse croak. "I mean, we were never together. I can't be upset."
Halle's face falls as she watches Olivia, and when her eyes meet mine, they widen a little in a what do we do way. I bite down on my lip and shrug because I have no idea.
"I'm so sorry, Liv," I say softly.
"No, really, it's fine." She looks up at me and wipes away the trail of tears that escaped, chasing them down her cheeks with the sleeve of her jacket. She smiles weakly as if I'm the one in need of comfort right now.
"We don't have to go tomorrow. I'll tell Micah we can't make it." I shake my head quickly, already trying to think of what we could possibly do tomorrow night instead to make her feel better. "We can stay in watch movies and—"
"No, really, it's okay." She shakes her head and looks back down at the picture on the screen, and when she finally looks back up, her emerald eyes are darker than before, more severe as she says, "I want to go."