October. A month I had been dreading since I talked to Foyet several months back. Every day I woke up fearing for Jack, fearing for our relationship.
Today was the official day. October 7th, Jack's 18th birthday. The day Foyet said would destroy Jack.
I woke up to the sound of knocking at the door. I was staying at the Hotchner home for his birthday party later that day. I heard Jack open the door and I jumped up. I just had this gut feeling telling me it was the letter.
I quickly walked down the stairs and saw Jack looking through the mail. He then got a package. It had Jack's name boldly written on it. He was just about to open it when he noticed me at the railing.
"Morning Mads." He smiled.
"Happy Birthday, love!" I walked down the stairs and took the package from his hand. I could feel the disc in the package and the fear grew in me.
"What are you doing?" He asked.
"You can't open this." I sternly spoke.
"Why? it's addressed to me." Jack muttered.
"Y-You just shouldn't open it." I stuttered, shaking my head.
"Madeline, what are you not telling me? Give me the package." He reached for it and I moved it out of reach.
"Jack, I'm sorry but you can't open this."
"Ok, what is going on with you?"
"Nothing."
"Are you cheating on me? Is this evidence to prove it."
"What? No, where did you get that conclusion from?"
"You have been sneaking around. Acting very off."
"I have not!" Shock and pain rose to my chest. Tears wanted to flow but I wouldn't let them.
"Yes, you have been. So who is the guy? Is he better than me?" Jack shouted.
"I have never cheated on you. I love you!" I yelled.
"Whatever. Have fun finding a ride to work." He shouted, running up the stairs to his room.
He walked back out and threw my clothes I was planning on wearing down the stairs. I quickly changed and got in my car Jack forgot I owned. I got my case files situated in my bag and left. I saw Jack pull out just a few seconds after me and somehow we still arrived at the BAU at the same time.
We stood in the elevator in silence. Once we got out we walked into the BAU. The team instantly stared at us. Noticing Jack didn't open the door for me and we didn't hold hands on the way in. I threw most of my stuff on my desk and so did Jack. I heard the team whispering about us but I ignored them.
Jack and I walked up the stairs and once at the top we went our separate ways. Jack went to his dad's office and I went to Rossi's. I slammed his door shut and just slid down the door. I broke down.
"Madeline, what's wrong?" Rossi asked.
"I'll tell you later." I said, running into Rossi's arms crying.
I calmed down and I still hadn't told him what happened. I was reading a book for one of my college classes and Rossi was working on a case file when Hotch walked in.
"We got a case." I nodded and got up. Hotch stayed behind and talked with Rossi.
Jack was the first person in the room. He was sitting in Prentiss' typical seat beside Hotch. I decided to steal Morgan's seat beside Rossi and my dad. When the team walked in they were shocked seeing me and Jack not sitting beside each other. Prentiss took Jack's old seat that was still beside Hotch and Morgan took my old seat beside Reid. Rossi was sitting across from Jack.
Garcia talked about the case and kept glancing between Jack and I. The team had obviously sensed the tension in the room.
Once we got on the plane and arrived in Nashville we got to work. I stayed with my dad and worked with him. We did geographical analysis along with reading over some things that belonged to the victims.
The team decided to go out for dinner, I wanted to stay back and 'work'. I got out my laptop and opened the package. I slid the disc into the computer and clicked play.
I watched Jack say goodbye to his mother and went into hiding. I listened to Hotch and Haleys last conversation. Then watched Haley get murdered right in front of my eyes. I tried to comprehend what Jack would feel If I would have let him watch this.
"Where did you get that?" Hotch asked. Scaring me since I didn't know anyone was there.
"It was a gift for Jack from Foyet. Foyet told me he was gonna send this to him for his 18th birthday. That's why I have been acting weird lately. That's why Jack thought I was cheating." I looked down, breaking eye contact.
"You were protecting him. You did nothing wrong, Madeline." Hotch stated, sitting beside me.
"It feels so wrong to lie to him. He saved me, Hotch. He is the reason I'm alive and without him I don't know what to do." I stated.
"Fight. You have been doing that since the day you were born." He put his hand on mine.
"You can only fight for so long, Hotch. You know that." I glanced from our hands to the screen.
"Yep, I gave up once. I was 15. I was getting beating after beating like you. My father was an alcoholic as you already know. I was about to take a bottle of pills because I was tired of life when I saw my brother in my shoes. I couldn't protect him any longer. So I kept fighting. You have to find something to push you forward, to have stamina during this run of life. Next thing I know I met Haley." Hotch looked down, then looked up at me.
"Your stamina also ended up cheating, leaving, and dying on you. What stops Jack from doing that to me?" I asked.
"He will do everything in his power to keep you two together. He already felt guilty for accusing you. He admitted it at dinner." Hotch stared at me with his stern face.
"So, who sent you here after realizing I wasn't at the hotel?" I asked.
"Reid and Jack both pleaded to be the ones to come get you but Rossi and I decided to." Hotch stated.
"Where is Rossi?" I asked.
"On the phone with Joy." I nodded my head at Hotch's response.
By the time Rossi and Hotch convinced me to go to the hotel to sleep It was time for the team to arrive. So instead I went to the couch. As soon as my head hit the pillow I was out.
Several hours later. I woke up to the sound of Jack talking to his mother. Hearing this caused me to jump and run into the room.
When I got there I saw Jack sitting at my computer content.
"Jack, turn it off." I yelled.
Before he could even react to my voice a gunshot rang from the computer. He jumped and intently stared at the computer. Tears were rolling down his face. I walked over to him and closed the computer. I wrapped my arms around him as he sobbed into my shoulder. My heart ached for him.
The team ran into the room. Hotch made eye contact with me and he knew. Jack had watched the video of his mother getting killed. I unwrapped myself from Jack's grasp and allowed Hotch to hug him. I heard Hotch telling him about the package he got yesterday, I knew it was from Foyet.
I couldn't listen any longer. I walked out of the room and basically turned my emotions off. I did it so much in my childhood to stop myself from feeling the pain and negativity of the world. I sat down in the lounge and stared at the tv. Knowing my life was gonna be so different now.
I went to the bathroom and did what I used to do to let my emotions out. Cut. I took the blade from my knife and slowly sliced at my wrists. Wincing at every slash I made. It was better this way.
Hotch then walked in. He probably knew what I was doing.
"Madeline dont!" Hotch sternly but softly spoke. I broke down then and there.
"Hotch, I tried to protect him and I failed. I failed as a Girlfriend. If I fail as a girlfriend that means I will fail as a wife and mother. Plus I already failed as a daughter." I broke. Once your other half breaks, you break as well.
"Shh, You are an excellent daughter. Amazing Girlfriend. You will be a wonderful wife and mother." I nodded. Not fully listening. Hotch helped clean my arms up and wrapped them.
"Jack was cutting earlier as well. I Feel like you deserve to know." I looked up, and nodded.
A scream interrupted our conversation. A scream I recognized as Emily's. Hotch and I looked at each other and everything after that moment felt like it was in slow motion.
I ran into the room and saw Jack with a knife through his abdomen. I quickly ran to him and held my hand around his wound. My father was calling the ambulance, Emily and Hotch were kneeling beside Jack, Morgan was holding JJ while on the phone breaking the news to Garcia, Rossi was outside waiting for the bus to arrive.
Once the ambulance arrived they told us only 2 people were allowed to ride with him. Those 2 people were me and Hotch. We quickly got in the ambulance and headed to the hospital. The team told us they would meet us there.
Right before we made it to the hospital Jack flatlined. The EMT is constantly doing CPR. Once there the team was right there behind us. We followed Jack until doctors stopped us. The whole time they were giving him compressions.
We waited in the waiting room for hours. Garcia had flown in and she was sitting beside Morgan and JJ. JJ was sitting beside Reid. I was sitting beside my dad and Hotch. Rossi was sitting beside Hotch.
After 8 hours Jack's doctor had walked out. The look on his face showed not so good news.
"I'm sorry, we don't expect him to make it." The doctor said.
A sob escaped my lips as my knees collided with the ground. For the first time in years I prayed. I prayed to Jesus for help, forgiveness. I prayed for Jack's life. I prayed for his survival. I prayed for hope.