Avani and I arrived just as Kiel was about to leave his house. "Oh, hi! What are you two up to today?" he asked, pausing on the threshold.
"Well, for starters, I haven't yet finished that translation," I replied with a smile.
"Huh? But I thought you said you couldn't read any more?" he said, scratching his head and looking confused.
"That was then, this is now—and now I can read more of it."
"Umm... okay, I don't really understand what happened, but I'm guessing you had a hand in this?" he said, turning to Avani with a smile. She blushed and looked up at me.
"Yes, you might say that," I laughed. "Now, may I have that second page?"
"Oh, sure..." he scampered off to his desk and rummaged around for a moment. "Ahh, here it is!" He returned and handed me the page.
I scanned it, noting that on this page there was a triangle in the lower corner. I sat at his table and he handed me a pen and ink. I began to jot down my translation as I read it through, and I summarized it to Avani and Kiel as I wrote.
"As I suspected, it continues the tale from the previous page. It says here that the girl stopped crying after the promise was made, never so much as shedding a tear. But then after they grew up, the man went on a long, long journey to save the townsfolk from a crisis—so long that they both knew they would never see each other again. Then on the day he left, she went to see him off, still refusing to cry even though all around her were in tears. She struggled to keep her promise to him, believing that somehow, someday, he'd return to her."
I sat up and leaned back in the chair, rubbing my forehead. "That... that's all for this page. I'm certain that there's more to the story, though." I looked up at Kiel. "You say there were instructions to find the second page?"
"Yeah! Right on the back of the first. So if you turn this page over... see? That should lead you to the next page! It's like a treasure hunt!" Kiel said enthusiastically.
I flipped the page over. On the back, in a tidy hand, were the words:
From the palace, go southwest;
Go southeast from the fires.
The next item of your quest
In a square coppice retires.
"Palace? Does that mean the castle?" said Kiel, thinking hard.
"No, the castle's too new. I think that would refer to the old haunted mansion where Dolce was imprisoned in her Guardian form. Before my time, it had been a pleasure palace for royalty. Even in my youth, it was so old that it was abandoned and ruined. My friends and I loved to explore the grounds when we were children. I assume that it was torn down at some point while I was sealed in the tower and that manor house was built in its place. Probably not too long after I became a Guardian, because Dolce lived only a few centuries after me at most, and the mansion was already old and haunted by her time."
"So then somewhere along the Autumn Road?" Avani asked, looking up at me.
I nodded. "Yes, that seems likely. And in fact, I think I know the place now."
"Well, then, what are we waiting for? Let's get going!" Avani laughed, pulling me up.
"Sounds good! Thanks for your help, Kiel."
"Sure! Oh, and you can keep those pages—they're only copies anyway. I'll keep looking, too, and I'll let you know if I find anything! And let me know if you find anything, okay?"
"Okay, we'll do that. I promise." Then Avani headed for the door, pulling me along behind her.
We took the airship to the Autumn Road, and I led the way south. As I had thought, there was a clearing with four stumps, situated so as to form the corners of a square. We knelt down in the center of the square and began to dig.
Before long, Avani bumped something solid. Scraping the dirt away from around it, we discovered a small but solid chest, well sealed. I lifted it out and opened it, and inside was a yellowed page, similar to the other two. "Well. Let's see what this one says." Although I tried to keep my tone light and cheerful, I doubted that I fooled her anymore than I fooled myself—I was trembling with fear and anxiety as I held up the page for a closer look.
Again summarizing as I translated, I read the content of the page. "It says.... Even after the man left her, she still didn't cry. Even when her mother and father passed away, still she held back her tears. Whenever she was upset or hurt, instead of crying, she would go to the tower and look at their names carved there. No one else knew of her promise, so she was seen as a cold-hearted, mean-spirited woman, disliked by most. And in time, she was left all alone."
"All alone...." I repeated, feeling stricken. The only other mark on the page was a square in the corner, corresponding to the triangle on the previous page. I flipped it over. On the back was a note:
Southwest of the shrine you'll find a lake,
If the southern road you take.
And if you wish upon a star,
You'll find a page—go west, not far.
I looked over at Avani, who was lost in thought. "Hey. Did I mention that I used to drag Maria all over the place?" She looked at me and nodded. "Well, so far these pages have been buried in spots that she and I used to visit—old haunts, where we'd spend hours at a time playing. And it's been bothering me... why she picked these places, I mean. What was the point? But I think I'm beginning to understand. Kiel said it was like a treasure hunt... but instead it reminds me of our childhood, when I'd wander all over the countryside with her in tow. I wonder... what was she thinking, what did she feel when she buried these pages? Was she thinking of me? Or...."
I stood up and looked towards the east. "Well, let's see what the next note brings, shall we? I believe I know just where to look for it." I helped her up and we returned to the waiting airship.
I set a course for Sercerezo Lake, explaining that it had to be the lake found by taking the southern road from the shrine—the ruins of the old water shrine—and looking to the southwest of the shrine. The only other lake in the area was Keeno lake, which couldn't be reached by the road south. Once at the lake, I remembered that there had once been a little grove a little ways west. The grove was surely long gone, but there might be some traces remaining.
We followed the path west, and there I saw that where the grove had once stood, there were now only five massive, ancient stumps remaining. Avani darted to the center of the cluster, and began to dig. A moment later, she sprang up, holding something out for me to see. "Look, Leo! A coin—a really old one, too—I've never seen one like it. Or not that I remember, anyway."
I took the coin from her. "Yes, this was one of the coins used in my time, minted shortly before my imprisonment, I'd guess—they'd changed the designs only a couple of years before, when the new king was crowned."
"Then this must be the place!" she cried, excitedly, kneeling down and starting to dig again.
I knelt down and joined her. After a while, we again struck something solid, and soon we were lifting out another small chest. My heart raced as I opened the box and beheld yet another page of ancient text within. I tried to lift it out, but my hands shook so that I couldn't grasp it. "My Lady... will you pick it up for me? My hands are shaking."
She took the chest from me and carefully lifted the page out, placing it into my trembling hands. I took a deep breath—I was eager and terrified, anxious and conscience-stricken all at once. I cleared my throat and began to interpret the writing.
"It says that one day a man began to talk with her, and over time they became good friends. One day he asked her, 'What would it take for you to be happy?'. She replied, 'For him to return.' 'That's it? Just having him return to you would make you happy?' 'Yes,' she said, 'he should marry me as he promised he would do.' 'And why would that make you happy?' the man asked her. 'Because then we would travel the same road through life, growing old side by side.' When the man heard her answer, he pulled out a small mirror and raised it to the level of her eyes. Reflected therein, she saw not a lovely young face, but an old woman, staring back at her with a scowl. She realized then that decades had passed since he had left her. Never would they walk down the same road, for life had led them too far apart. Several days later, she returned to the tower one last time. Their names were still there, but nothing else remained. Her family and friends were all gone now. Even he was gone—nothing more than a name carved into stone. She had lost all that she'd had, even him—for she knew he'd never return. Really, she'd known it in her heart of hearts all along. She'd even known that, to him, she was nothing but a little sister. But she hadn't been able to give up on her wish. For the first time in decades, the tears flowed down her cheeks. She couldn't have stopped them even if she had tried. 'In the end, I couldn't keep my promise after all,' she muttered. And then... she disappeared. Her final wish was that 'he' would one day disappear, too."
There was nothing else on the page but a star in the lower corner. I turned the page over, but the back side was blank. I sank to the ground. "And so the story ends." Avani looked at me, her eyes full of tears. I looked away, unable to bear any more suffering.
"What a miserable ending, after all.... So, she wants me to disappear. Well, I can't blame her. I made a promise that I couldn't keep, yet she waited for me all the same. And this... is the result." I looked back up at her, then jumped up, suddenly filled with impotent rage. "Damn it! Don't look at me like that! You think she was cold-hearted, don't you? You blame her for feeling that way? Don't make me laugh! You don't know anything about her!"
She looked at me, aghast as I railed at her. "Leo...?" she whispered, slowly shaking her head as the tears began to fall.
"She wasn't cold—it wasn't that she didn't want to cry, that she didn't feel anything. She just couldn't! I stole her tears and bound her heart with a promise I never realized she took seriously until it was too late! She didn't break that promise—it was me, I was the one that broke it when I left her behind!"
"Leo...."
"Damn it, Avani! Don't you get it? You—you've had it so easy compared to her! Everyone adores you, don't they? Everyone protects you and looks out for the beloved princess. But why... why didn't anyone protect her? Why did they just leave her all alone? Why didn't they see... see what I saw in her?" I fell to my knees, tears sliding down my cheeks. "Why... didn't I just stay with her? I just... I just wanted her to smile... always to smile. I couldn't bear to see her cry. That was all I wanted." I buried my face in my hands, groaning. "What else could I have done? And now... what do I do now?"
I knelt there, fighting to get myself under control. Avani knelt close by, waiting in silence for me. After a time, I stood, and looked down at her. "I apologize, My Lady. I... I lost control. Let's go. I need to get these papers to Kiel."
She placed a hand lightly on my arm. "It doesn't have to be right now...."
"Yes, it does!" I snapped. She recoiled slightly, and I sighed. "Sorry.... I promised him I'd let him know as soon as we found anything. And I never want to break another promise again. Never!" And I turned and left, with her trailing along behind me.
Back in town, I said, "I'm going to take these papers to Kiel now." I gave her a half smile and flipped a strand of hair out of her eyes. "Don't worry about me. I'm... fine." Then I walked away, leaving her standing at the gates.
I gave the papers to Kiel, leaving him to pore over them enthusiastically. Then I returned to my room to sit and think. A while later, I heard footsteps creeping softly up the stairs, and soon Avani was stepping cautiously into my room. "Leo?"
I turned and looked up at her. "Ah, it's you. I... gave those papers to Kiel. Just like I promised." She looked so concerned, but there wasn't anything I could do about it right then. I stood and walked over to her. "I told you, don't worry about me. The battle is over." Then I gently turned her away, closing the door behind her. After several minutes, I heard her footsteps going slowly down the stairs.
When I felt sure she was gone, I left my room. I didn't feel like being around others right then, so I headed to Dragon Lake outside of town. But it just wasn't my day for solitude, it seemed, because soon afterwards, who should come along down the steps but Avani. I sighed to myself as she approached. "Yes, My Lady? Is something wrong?" She looked at me as if she wanted to say something, but wasn't sure how to say it. "Did we have plans? Did I... promise something?"
She shook her head. "No... it's not that. It's... it's about Maria's story."
I stiffened. "Let's not talk about her anymore."
"But...."
"Just forget it!" I shouted. Her eyes opened wide, startled by my ferocity. "Look... I'm sorry for shouting. But just forget all about it, okay? I'll... just live with the burden. That's all I can do to try to make amends." Then, unexpectedly, Avani put her arms around me and held me tightly, leaning her cheek against my chest. "Wha...?" I exclaimed in surprise.
Still embracing me, she looked up. "I don't know what you should do, or what I can do to help you. All I can do is follow what my heart tells me to do. And what my heart is telling me to do is to hold you close and look into your eyes. Xiao had some very good advice for me earlier. To summarize, she said that the world is too big a place for any one person to take on everything all alone—even you. So that started me thinking... what can I do? How can I help you get through this?"
"And... this was your answer?" I asked her incredulously.
"Yes. And I think it's the right answer, too—it's something that only I can do for you. Love and passion—those are joys reserved for the living. And I do love you, Leo. I'm sure Maria felt the same way. And if I'm right... well, I'm sure, too, that she'd want you to be happy, because who doesn't want their beloved to be happy? She might have felt resentful—resentful that you could be happy without her. But all the same, she'd still want you to be happy. I know... it's kind of a paradox. But that's love for you. When you love someone, you just want their happiness, even if it hurts you. It's a bittersweet mixture of pleasure and pain.
"I know I'm not perfect. Even though I try not to be jealous... sometimes I am anyway. And I know I'm not much of a homebody, so sometimes I might not be there for you when you need me. And I do have a bit of a temper.... But I love you, Leo, and I want you to have eyes only for me. I don't want to share you, and I don't want to give you up. But... more than anything in all the world—I just want you to be happy. With me, or—if necessary—without me. That's my true heart's wish.
"I know... I'm rambling on and not making much sense. This is all so confusing for me, too. But these are my honest, real feelings, laid bare for you. Nothing hidden—not anymore."
"Avani...."
"So... so don't forget about Maria. Keep her memory green in your heart. She, too, loved you with all her heart. I could never ask you to forget her—it wouldn't be fair to either of you. Just like I could never forget Sundara—and I know you'd never ask it of me, because he and I were once in love, too. He was and is important to me, just as Maria was and is important to you."
I looked down into her sea green eyes. "And... are you really okay with that?"
She blushed and looked down, tightening her hold on me. "I... I don't know, honestly. But there's nothing I can do about it. All I can do is to keep on loving you... so that's exactly what I'm going to do."
I sighed. "But...."
Just then, Kiel came tearing down the steps, full steam ahead. "Hey, you guys! You'll never guess what!" He ran up to us, then paused to catch his breath as we moved apart and waited for him to continue. "I did it! I solved the mystery of those pages!" he exclaimed, joyfully triumphant.
"Mystery?" I asked, bewildered.
"Here, you see these symbols on the bottom corners of the pages? The first page had a line, the second a triangle, the third a square, and the fourth a star. Well, I kept puzzling it over—there just had to be a reason for those symbols. Otherwise, why put them there? It's not like they're terribly decorative or anything. And I just now figured it out!"
"Yes? Go on, what's the reason?" I asked, intrigued.
"Each symbol has an ascending number of points: two, three, four, and five. And likewise, each page was found in the midst of a corresponding number of stumps."
"Yes, that's true...." Avani said, looking puzzled.
"But of what possible significance is that?" I asked.
"Well...." Kiel paused, grinning and giggling.
"Come on, out with it!" I exclaimed.
"First, I have a question for Avani: What is written on the pages of a book besides the text itself?"
She thought for a moment. "You mean those symbols are page numbers?"
"Yep! You got it! The number of points on each symbol represents not only the number of stumps where it was found, but also what page number it was in the sequence!"
"But then that means...." she hesitated.
"Then that means that the first page...." I added.
"That first page isn't page one—it's really page two!" Kiel finished with a huge grin. "So that story hasn't really ended yet—or rather, it hasn't begun!"
Avani gasped and looked up at me. "Leo!"
"The story... the story isn't over?" I said in disbelief.
"That's right! I need to go tell Arthur about this—won't he be excited!" And he ran back up the steps to the street.
I turned and stared into the waters of the lake. "So her story isn't finished.... But it's only the beginning that we're missing. The ending won't change." I pondered for a few minutes, torn about what to do.
After a short while, I turned to her. "My Lady, suppose we do find that first page.... Do you... do you think that somehow she'll be saved after all?"
"I don't know—because I'm not her. But," she continued, putting her finger on my lips to silence me, "I would want to be remembered, of that I'm certain. To be remembered by the ones I loved—to never be forgotten. That, in itself, would make me happy."
"To never be forgotten.... I see." I smiled down at her. "Well, then, My Lady, let's go. I have an idea where to find that first page. If we go by the other pages, the first page should be near a single marker."
"But... there are so many places with just one stump! How will we...."
"It needn't be a stump. You see, I've been racking my brain, trying to figure out why she scattered the pages all over creation—if it was to think of me as she did it, or remind me of her as I found them, or some other reason. And I think it was to remind me of our time together. Nothing else really makes sense. So the first page should be somewhere obvious... somewhere I'd go on my own, without a need for directions."
I turned and looked to the far west. "And my guess is that place would be a single, tall tower, rising up to the heavens."
"A tower..." she whispered, looking also towards the western sky.
"Yes. Let's go there, back to the beginning—to seek the remnants of a vow I can never fulfill... and to keep my promise to you, to share my true feelings with you, when this was all over with." I clasped her hand in mine and smiled at her. "Let's go to Leon Karnak."