I'm given a full night's rest and the first thing I'm given in the morning is a physical.
Once the doctor is finished with her notes, she leaves to file them. That's when I finally get a look at myself in the bathroom mirror.
Since Michael locked me in the basement, I had gradually been losing all the weight I had gained in the five years since I was first pregnant with Robin. My body in those years had filled out and I didn't look quite so itty-bitty.
Now I am back to looking the way I did when I was first abducted, only with lines on my face where there weren't lines before, and a few grey hairs that I immediately pluck out with my fingers. My face is really gaunt and lifeless, but steady meals and sunlight will fix that right up.
I look terrible. But, hey, I'm also alive. That's what matters. It's the only thing that matters.
I splash some water in my face and comb my dripping fingers through my hair. My face twitches as my fingers catch on several serious knots. That's when I hear the door to my room open.
"Hello? Miss Walker," a woman's voice calls. "Someone's here to see you."
My whole body perks up as I poke my head out of the bathroom.
"Mommy! Mommy!"
I don't even see Robin as he crashes into me and hugs me right around my hips. Tears fill my eyes as I lift my baby up into my arms. My throat is heavy and words fail me as I hold Robin close to my chest. He rests his head there, reminding me of all the times I held him like this when we were locked in the basement.
I don't even realize that I've walked over to the bed and plopped down to rock him like I always have. My breaths come out in gentle sobs as I hold my son even closer.
Not once did I think that Robin would find help. I just wanted him safe from Michael. It didn't matter what would happen to me; I didn't care. As long as my son got away.
Robin pulls away after what feels like forever and puts a tiny hand to my cheek. "Don't cry, Mommy. Don't cry. It's okay."
I can't help but laugh. "Baby, I'm fine. I'm not sad." My fingers hastily wipe my hot tears away as they slip out. "This-this is a happy cry- a-a more than happy cry." I hold my son's face between my hands and look over his face. "Robin, I'm so proud of you." My voice gets quieter with each word and breath, but in truth it takes everything I have not to let myself break down into a sobbing mess.
I've had no trouble hiding my real emotions before. I had to do it countless times with Michael.
Every time he laid a cold hand on me when I didn't want him to. Every time he kissed me. Every time he used his teeth. Every time he wanted to have sex.
It was almost a game. One he never even knew I was playing. It was the game that kept me alive long enough to be here. I played the part so well that I even started to believe my bullshit too. I actually thought I was happy.
The little moments were lovely. When we would cook something new together. When we would play a board game. When Robin would fall asleep between the two of us while we watched a movie. The human moments are the ones where I felt happy.
The human moments. But a lot of monsters wear a human mask. And it's enough to convince the wrong people.
I knew that. I always knew that.
What I don't know is if I would still be alive if Michael had known every thought that crossed my mind. Every time I thought about killing him and running away.
No. That is a lie. I do know. He would have killed me. Slowly. Oh so slowly...
My weeks of torture would've been so much worse. He would've used every trick he had up his sleeve. Pliers, knives, fire. Everything. And he would've made it last weeks. Night and day. It would not have taken long for me to beg for death.
He would have rolled out the blood red carpet just for me. And walk me across it himself. Step by step.
I was always his favorite victim.
I pull my son back to me and cradle him tightly against my chest. "You saved me, baby. You saved us. We're safe now. We're safe. We're safe."
These are the words I repeat. Over and over again. Because, for the first time in years... it's true.
The lady who brought him in clears her throat.
"Miss Walker. The two men who found him in the woods... If you're up for it, they would like to meet you. The detectives have already cleared them. If you want to meet with them, all you have to do is say so."
My breath catches in my throat as I shoot to my feet, Robin wrapping his arms around my neck to keep his balance steady.
"I... Of course. Yes. I would love to meet them."
The lady smiles. "Alright. They should be here in a few hours." She turns to leave. "Oh. One more thing. Another detective is coming. He's been working hard on your case for a really long time."
I nod before pressing a kiss to Robin's hair. "I'll be back later to check on you, Miss Walker." Then she leaves us alone.
Miss Walker... Walker. It's been so long since the last time I heard my last name. In fact, my own name feels like an old friend. One who I haven't seen in what feels like a lifetime. Forever, really.
Then I hear another name.
"September?"
I turn back to the door and my breath catches in my throat. "Mason," I breathe.