Jack, Milton, Eddie, Kim, and I were stretching when Jerry bursts in.
"Guys, huge problem- Kelsey Vargas, the coolest girl in school, is on her way here." He runs over to us.
"For your sake, I hope you meant coolest girl that is not in this dojo right now." I glare at him, popping my knuckles. He nods fast, scared. "Good." I go back to stretching.
"Don't panic. We've trained for this. Guys, bust out the emergency deodorant." Jack runs to his locker.
Jerry scoffs,"I don't need deodorant."
"Yes, yes you do." I pat his shoulder. I walk up to Jack and lean on the locker next to his, my locker. "I don't take any chances. I'm wearing a necklace of air fresheners right now." Eddie pulls out the necklace that has 5 or 6 car air fresheners on a chain,"This week I'm Alpine Meadow." He sniffs them.
"I told Kelsey I was a martial arts expert and the youngest sensei in history." Jerry panics. "Welp, you straight up lied." I smile and Jack elbows me in the gut. I put my hands up like I'm going to fight him and he cowards, tripping over his bag. I hold out my hand and help him up while I laugh and he glares.
Just then, our sensei walks in. "Oh, Rudy, Kelsey's on her way. Dude, please hook me up with that black belt." Jerry pleads. Rudy scoffs,"You can't have this black belt. It's a symbol of hard work, honor, and respect."
"Then why do you use it to walk your dog?" I jump on Jack's back and he carries me over to Rudy, not setting me down even when we reach the sensei. Rudy turns and points at me,"That was one time and it was an emergency. I had a pug with the squirts and new white carpet." Jack and I grimace at his statement.
"Look, can we stop talking and get back to sparring, please?" Rudy sounds ticked off. "Jerry, you're up against Naomi. Milton, you're with Kim. Jack, you're with Eddie." Rudy walks to the side of the mat. "Jack?!" Eddie questions. Jack shows off his moves and Eddie looks terrified. "Hold on, my phone's vibrating." Eddie pulls out his wallet and pretends it's a phone.
"I hate to be that guy, but- Hello." Eddie puts the wallet up to his ear. "You mean the guy that pretends his wallet is a phone?" Jack scoffs. "Please, shhhh!" Eddie shushed Jack. "Can you hear me now?" Eddie walks out, leaving Jack partner less. Rudy tells us to hurry up when Kelsey walks in.
Jerry and I step up and get in a fight position. "Hi, Jerry." Kelsey looks at the boy while he spins around. He gasps,"Kelsey, what a surprise." Kelsey crosses her arms,"So these are your students that fear and respect you?" I fake smile,"Yes we are." I drop the smile,"And I'm about to fear and respect the living grits out if him right now."
"Oh, no, not my grits. I'm gonna need my grits." Jerry cowards. I fake smile again, grabbing Jerry's arm and flipping him. He stands up looking around, dizzy,"Yeah, I'd say you've got that move down pretty well. Oh, you guys take a five. Kelsey and I are gonna get a froyo. Oh, come on Kelsey." Jerry walks over to her but puts his arm over Rudy's shoulders, leaving Kelsey behind.
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Jack and I were in the hall, along with Eddie and Kim, studying for a test we have in English today when Jerry walks down the stairs,"Hey, thanks a lot, Naomi. You cost me a date with the coolest girl in school." I scoff,"What are you gonna do, Sensei Martinez? Throw me out of the dojo?" Eddie laughs and Jack holds in a laugh. "Naomi, in the future, let's respect Jerry enough not to embarrass him in front of girls he's lying to." Jack says, out of sympathy.
"Jack, Jack, Jack, you gotta be kidding me. He already does that himself." I shrug as Eddie and Kim burst out laughing. Even Jack let's out a small chuckle. "That's it." Jerry tries to lunge at me. I hold out my fist and leave it there as Jerry's face rams into it. He rubs his cheek,"Owweeeeee."
He crosses his arm as a kazoo plays. Everyone laughs as Milton comes through the hall wearing a ridiculous king outfit and holds a scepter. "All hail Miltonius, the newly-crowned king of Narnia!" He looks at us and smiles. Jack sets down his textbook and gets up,"See, Milton, this is the reason you had to go to spring formal with the bio lab skeleton."
Milton's smile falls,"I'll have you know that Bonita is an excellent dancer." "Hey, I know what's going on. It's that time of the year when all the dorks come out to play swords and magic in the park." Eddie tells us. We all nod. "Or if it rains, we use the bingo hall at the senior center." Milton shrugs,"We tear it up."
Kelsey walks by,"Hi, Jerry." "Hey, Kelsey." Jerry moves Milton back and steps up to where Kelsey was but she kept walking so he yelled to her,"I was just talking to this kid I've never seen before. I don't even know his name. Right, Milton? Really, Jerry?" He walks to where Jack was sitting earlier and sits down, moving Jack's book in the process.
"Guys, big news, this year you all are going to participate in the battle with me." Milton smiles while Jack sits between me and Kim. I bring my legs over Jack's lap and lean against Eddie's legs,"What happened to all of your other 'friends?'" I put 'friends' in air quotes.
Kim nods,"Yeah, you know, the ones that throw up when Naomi and I try to talk to 'em?" Milton shrugs,"Well, this year thing are a little complicated. Francis has a bassoon recital, Jeffrey is a finalist in the Mathlympics, and Louis got grounded for teaching his cockatiel bad words."
"Dude, we're not gonna be part of your nerdfest." Jerry scrunches his face. Milton snickers,"Very funny, Jerry. NerdFest is in Minneapolis in October."
Jack puts his hand on top of mine, which was on my thigh, and starts playing with my rings,"See, Milton, a bunch of dudes in tights, running around the woods beating each other senseless with foam swords- it's just not our thing." Milton frowns,"Well, it's my thing and I wanna share this moment with my best friends. That's you guys."
Eddie gets up, making my back fall to the carpeted steps we are sitting on. "Ow!" I exclaim but Eddie ignores me,"I don't know. I just quit the cello and threw out my panda bear backpack. I'm just starting to get cool." "Come on, just give it a chance. Soon you'll know the exhilaration of bounding down a hill, cape aflutter," Milton starts but Jack, Eddie, Kim, Jerry, and I picked up our stuff and ran to class before we could hear anymore about his nerd palooza.
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Jack, Eddie, Kim, and I walk out of the dojo to see Jerry approaching doing some type of dance move or something. "Oh, guys, check it out. I smoothed everything out with Kelsey. I promised I would never lie to her again, and I got a date with her this afternoon." Jerry said, clearly excited.
Jack and Eddie applaud the boy while Kim and I just stare, blankly. "The kid is back in the game. Whoo!" Jerry victoried. "When was the kid ever in the game?" I ask Jerry as Jack elbows me in the ribs. "Elbow me one more time and I swear I will-" "Nerd alert." Eddie cut me off when three kids who were dressed in ridiculous costumes walked over to us.
The kid in the middle, Sidney, spoke up,"Greetings. We are the Dark Knights. Warriors known for being brave and ferocious and-" "Ferocious? Sidney, you cried in science when your fruit fly died." I cut him off. "That fruit fly left behind 3,000 babies." Sidney tried to defend himself.
"Milton said he put together a band of loyal warriors that will finally capture our grail and defeat us." Sidney scoffs,"Like that's gonna happen. Ha-ha-ha-haa. Haa-haa." Sidney starts mocking an evil laugh that sounded terrible. "Dude, dude, dude." Jack stops Sidney and his awful laugh.
"That evil laugh is so not working." Jack points out. Sidney turns to look at the kid on his left,"Thanks, Benny. You told me it was intimidating." The kid, Benny, shrugged right before Sidney lead the two boys away from the mall and us.
We all go to sit down, until Jack realizes something,"Whoa. Guys, Milton called us his loyal warriors. Now he's going to be out there, all alone, against a flock of dweebs hopped up on Honey Buns." Kim's eyes widen,"Uh, Jack, are you saying we should go to the park and help him?" Jack nods.
"Because, uh, I-I can't. My, uh, aunt Charlotte- yeah, she's coming in from, uh, Charlotte and we're gonna go watch 'Charlotte's Web?'" Kim's voice gets higher with every word and her statement sounds more like a question. Everyone is silent for a second. "You suck at lying." I nod, finally saying something.
Kim gives a sarcastic smile and sits down next to me. Jack still stands,"Look, Milton's always been there for us." Jack walks over to Jerry and points at him,"Jerry, what about the time where you tried to get Kelsey jealous by making her think you were dating a cheerleader? Who helped you out?"
We all think of the time when Milton dressed up like a cheerleader. "Wow, you're right. He was there for me." Jerry takes a short pause,"Did you know that Brian Donnelly actually asked him out." Kim gasps, since she has had a crush on Brian for like 2 years now. I laugh and whisper to her,"You wish that was you, huh?"
She elbowed me and I laughed again. Jack looks at me with a 'Can I continue' look. "Proceed." I nodded once. Then Jack jesters to Eddie and walks up to him,"Eddie, what about you? You hate going to visit your nana."
"That's because she always wants to do thinks to my hair." Eddie rubs his bald head. "But who always goes with you?" Jack asks, as we all remember when Eddie's nana braided Milton's hair and added beads to it.
Eddie shakes his head, slowly,"Sometimes I think Nana loves him more than me." He then looks up at Jack and smiles,"And I'm ok with that." Jack continues,"Kim, what about the time at the St. Patrick's Day Concert when you lost your voice? Who got you through that?"
We then remember the time when Milton hid off stage and sang while Kim lip synced. "Guys, I think you know what we have to do." Jack states. I scoff,"Ok, hold up, hold the phone. I don't remember one time Milton has ever been there for for me. Do you?"
Jack finally sits down right across from me,"That's were you are wrong, Naomi." He points at me. "Get your dirty finger out of my face before I rip it off." I look in dead in the eyes as he takes his finger away, slowly.
"My point is, he has been there for you." Jack says.
"Really? When?" I ask.
"Remember the time that you ran out of metal for your rings, and you were broke, so you couldn't buy anymore?"
I nod slowly.
"Who bought you 10 pounds of metal, just so you you would be happy?" Jack asked and after I didn't reply he asks,"Hm?"
I think of when I was sad about not being able to make more rings, but Milton walked through the door with piles of metal, that he could barely carry,"Milton Krumpnick."
"So? Now you guys know what we have to do, right?" Jack questions.
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Everyone walks out, but I stay inside. Kim is wearing a princess costume, Eddie is a weird elf, Jack is a knight, and Jerry...I have no clue what he is. Before I walk out I hear Kim say,"I don't get it. Why do I have to be the princess?" I walk out,"'Cause I am not wearing a pink in purple dress when I could be a badass archer."
My costume

Kim glares at me. I look over at Jack and his eyes are wide as he looks at me. "What? Do I got a bug on my face or something?" I feel around my face as Jack speaks,"N-no. You just, uh, look c-cool." He gulps. "Ok? Thank you, I guess." I question as we start walking to the park.
I can hear Jerry speak to a woman at the food court,"Hey, lady, eyes up here, ok? Oh, these sexy legs are a curse."
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We have been walking for ages through woods. "I can't take this anymore. It's hot, my feet are killing me, and these elf ears are starting to get sweaty!" Eddie complains as he rings his ear out. I glare at him,"You don't get to complain, buddy boy! We could have stayed on the path to the battlefield, but no, you knew a shortcut through the woods!"
I grab the game elf ear and yell into it,"THIS IS NOT A FREAKING SHORTCUT, EDDIE!!!" I slap Eddie's fake ear into his hand. "Relax. I'm an Explorer Scout. I was trained to navigate by the stars." Eddie states. I grab one of my fake plastic knives that is on my thigh and hit it in my hand,"Oh, I can help you see the stars!"
I start to walk close to Eddie before I feel two hands on my waist, pulling me back. "Whoa, hey, hey, hey, calm down." It was Jack. He grabs the knife from my hand and slides it back into the holster on my thigh.
"Are you calm?" He asks. "If wanting to smack the living daylights out of Eddie is calm, then yes, I am very calm." I try to run to to Eddie, but Jack pulls me back by my waist, again. "Chill." He holds me in place. "Chill? Chill!?" I yell. "Yes. Chill or I'm not gonna talk to you for the rest of the day. Are you gonna chill?"
"Yes." I say, barely audible. "Ok, guys, Naomi and I are going to go talk and chill out. Make sure Jerry doesn't do anything stupid." Jack points at Kim. She chuckles, sarcastically,"No promises, hun."
Jack walks me away from the group and we sit on a log,"Why are you acting so crazy?" I sigh,"Jack, you wouldn't understand." I pat his shoulder.
"Try me." He crosses his arms.
"You asked for it." I sigh,"I'm on my period."
His eyes widen,"I, uh, that explains it." I laugh at him.
"Jack?"
"Yeah?"
"I like-" I get interrupted by a high pitched scream. Jack and I run back to see Jerry with a face full of porcupine needles.
"Kim! I thought I told you to not let him do anything stupid!" Jack exclaims. "May I remind you, it's Jerry. He breathes, sleeps, eats, and talks stupid." Kim points out.
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"You got a little something here." Jack points to Jerry's face that has a needle still in it. "Where?" Jerry asks. I pull out the needle and he screams.
Kim finally catches up with us. "Where were you?" Eddie exclaims. "Let's just say I did something I've never had to do before and hope I never have to do again." Kim grimaces.
"You know what? I just realized..." Jack reaches into his pocket,"I have a GPS on my phone. I'll get us out of these woods." Jack tries to use his phone but Eddie stops him,"No, no, no. I said I'll get us out and I will." He grabs Jack's phone,"Explorer Scouts do not rely on GPS."
Jack and Eddie start to fight over the phone until it flies into a log. "Now ya happy? My phone just flew I to that log." Jack gets pissed. "Relax." Eddie replied. "You know, you say relax a lot but it never helps the situation." I ramble.
"I'll get it." Eddie walks over to the log and sticks his hand in it,"Hey, I got it." It started buzzing. "I think you got a call. It's starting to buzz." Eddie picks his hand up and there was a huge beehive on his hand. "My phone's not buzzing. That's a beehive!" Jack exclaims.
Eddie screams and throws it to Kim, who throws it to Jerry, who throws it to me, who throws it to Jack, who kicks it. Bees go everywhere and start to fly to us. I run into the woods with Kim and Jerry as Eddie and Jack stay behind.
After the bees stop chasing us, we go back to see Eddie covered in mud and Jack on the ground. I run over to him,"Jack. Jack. Jack!" He wakes up,"Wow, I really hit my head. Is there a bump." Jack stands up with a huge bump on his forehead. "Just a teeny one." I state, trying to keep him calm.
"Dude, your forehead is jacked up." Jerry says and I smack him upside the head as Jack feels his forehead. His eyes widen.
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Kim got her hair stuck in a bush so I helped Eddie and when he was using his pocket knife, it slipped and cut my arm. "Ow! Eddie! What the hell!" I grip my left arm in pain. "Sorry!" He finished getting Kim's head unstuck and ran away from me.
Kim and I walked back and Jack looked at my arm the second he saw blood. I told him what happened and he wrapped my arm in some cloth from his costume. We then looked at Kim whose hair was jacked up. She ran to the battlefield as Jack spoke to Eddie,"Eddie, even if you make it out of this battle alive, Kim's gonna kill you."
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We run over to the battleground to see Sidney pointing his sword at Milton. "It's over, Miltonius! Prepare to taste my foam." Sidney exclaimed as I grabbed my bow and arrow from behind my back and shoot one at Sidney's hands, making him drop the sword as it hits him. "Ow! Who launched an arrow at me?" Sidney grabbed his hand as the five of us scream and charge at the group.
"This army's made if ogres!" Sidney exclaims, clearly scared for his life.
"Those aren't ogres, those are my friends." Milton stood up and picked up his sword as Sidney and his group of nerds retreated.
We ran up the hill where Milton and Rudy were stood, protecting the grail. "You guys made it." Milton smiled from ear to ear.
"This may not be our thing, but if it means something to you, then we're with you, King Miltonius." Jack smiles back at Milton.
"Thank you." Milton's smile grows, if that is even possible.
"By the way, if you expect me to battle with you, you owe me twenty bucks." I point out.
"Ten." Milton argues.
"Eighteen."
"Twelve."
"Sixteen."
"Fourteen."
"Twenty. Take it. Or leave it." I say as Milton cowards back and nods. "Ight. I'll battle."
Milton looks at Kim,"Who's the dude with the punked-out mullet?"
I shake my head and put my hand near my neck and draw it to my side, telling him 'shut up or you are dead!'
Jack changes the subject when he sees Kim's shocked face,"All right, guys, hands in. We've got us a grail to capture."
We all put our hands in and yell,"Wasabi!" as we lift them up in the air. "Charge!" Milton yells as we run down the hill.
I climb up a small tree so I can use my bow and arrow. I see Jack having trouble with about six nerds trying to get him. I jump from the tree and roll on the ground, standing up next to Jack. The nerds get Jack and I back to back as I use my little dagger to get them out.
Jack and I had a plan since we knew this was going to happen. "Now!" I yell as Jack and I drop our weapons and Jack picks me up by my waist swinging me to right side if his hip, to the left, hitting the guys behind him. Jack flings me towards the other guys and I kick both of them from doing a flying dragon kick.
Jack tosses me a sword as I slice the nerds on the stomach and Jack does the same. Six nerds out if the game all from that. "Yeah! Don't mess with the Wasabi Warriors!" Jack exclaimed as he backed up and fell over a rock. I grabbed our weapons and handed his to him.
"Need a hand?" I offer.
"Yeah, no, I'd rather stay on this rock." Jack says, sarcastically as I help him up. We look to our left to see more kids charging to us. "Uh oh." Jack and I say as we run the other way.
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Jack and I ran off and lost the nerds when we see Milton hanging trouble while the grail, from the other team, was on a seesaw. Jack nods to tell me to go up the hill to grab the grain.
Jack goes running and jumps in the pole of the swing set and swings off, jumping onto the other end of the seesaw, making the grail go flying into the air. I keep my eye on it and dive, keeping the grail close to my chest as the impact of the hard dirt hits my back.
I hurry and stand up, placing the grail next to ours on the little table. Milton cheers,"Victory!" as he runs up next to me. Everyone follows him as we hug and cheer.
"Way to go, Milton! You did it!" I cheer and clap for the red headed boy.
"No, Naomi, we did it!" Milton smiles brightly as he gives me a hug.
"You still owe me money." I point at him.
"Yeah, yeah, I know, twenty dollars." He sighs.
"Nah, Milton, ten. I actually kinda had fun beating nerds up without getting dragged away by Jack." I laughed and everyone joined.
Kim went to pick up the grail,"Here you go, Milton. You've earned your gr-" until she noticed her hair in the reflection of it. She shrieked an ear piercing shriek. "My hair!" She has I high pitched voice. "What happened to my hair?"
We all stay silent and Kim looks at Eddie like she was going to kill him, which she probably was. "Eddie?"
He laughs nervously.
"You are so dead!"
Eddie starts running as Kim runs after him before tackling him. "Oh, come on! You guys let her do that but when I want to punch Jerry in the face, Jack stops me?" I exclaim. "Unfair, people. Unfair!"
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We all walking into the dojo in our normal clothes, thank God! "Thanks again, guys. I know you were embarrassed by thos costumes. But don't worry, you'll never have to wear them again and no one at school will ever have to know." Milton smiles.
"You're right, Milton, they don't, but they will." Jack smirks.
"Just to let you know, I only agreed to this 'cause one, Jack's gonna buy my ice cream, and two, I look pretty damn good in an archer costume, not gonna lie." I shrug and smirk.
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We walk through the halls wearing our costumes. I hear laughs everywhere, but I keep my head held high. I was standing next to Jack and when I guy asked for my number, Jack put his hands on my shoulders, protectively, and barked at him.
"What's your deal?" I ask, laughing because he barked at a guy.
"I don't like that turd bucket." Jack frowns, angrily. I pat his head like a dog and laugh. "You're never gonna let this go and tease me for the rest of my life, aren't you?" Jack asks as I smirk and nod before laughing and messing up his hair.
"Come on, Dingus."
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A/n sorry that I haven't been posting. I have been busy but I'm gonna try and post more again. Love you guys!
4102 words!
Btw this is unedited because I want to post it asap.