"Dude quit bugging me, I said no." I groaned, stepping off the treadmill as I made to pick up a dumbbell.
"Jeez man, that sounds like a no from hell." Lade chuckled, his deep voice resonating through the tiny speakers of my airpod, riling me up some more.
"It's just tiktok, no one's asking you to do drugs."
Holding my breath, I watched my right muscles contrast as I lifted a mini dumbbell before expelling a breath.
"No."
I heard him kiss his teeth, while the soft rap music playing at the background told me he was probably at Khalid's house, kicking it back and trying to unwound like they always did every day and I didn't care.
"Yo man!" Khalid shouted. "Is your mum around?"
"She's got a kid your age man. Keep it together!" Lade groaned. "But damn!" The asshole continued. "Aunty Vee fine as hell!"
I rolled my eyes. I was going to have a headache today.
When I'd told mum I had no friends, I wasn't trying to be sarcastic or anything. I just didn't see myself being friends with these niggas.
One would think I was being unreasonable by refusing to be friends with guys who by societal standards, were perfect friendship materials.
I mean, Lade Bademosi's Father, Femi Bademosi, was one great business tycoon and model philanthropist, who had several NGOs that had solutions to almost every problem that was out there.
Khalid Seabuoy came from oil money. And his mother was thee Onome Seabuoy. Activist, feminist and human rights lawyer, who made good use of the money by giving back to the society through handling every case from the underprivileged, probono and going through hell and back to make sure justice got served in their favor.
Sometime in highschool, there was a rumour that she'd been threatened by a native doctor who'd colluded with her widowed client's brother in-law, that they'd make her go insane by the end of the court seating.
But that's beside the point I'm making.
These guys weren't like the antithesis of their parents and neither did they come off as the society's nightmare. They just weren't my cup of tea.
With Lade's cheating spree, tiktok obsession and Khalid's extravagant party boy lifestyle, I just couldn't deal with too much teen angst and drama.
"Ay, you know what Somzy," Khalid's voice came on. "Fuck tiktok, Lade's girlfriend be cooking up this hot ass, house party. And you know what that means? Hot shorties and free booze."
There was rustling at the other end, I rolled my eyes, knowing they were struggling over the cellphone. "Fuck off, that not his scene." Lade had the phone. "Look man, you don't have to do anything. Just exist and look good as usual."
I groaned out in frustration. I couldn't even work out in peace.
"I ain't doing shit Lade." I bit out, dropping the dumbbell out of frustration.
"He got 50k plus followers after you showed your pretty face!" Khalid screamed through the speakers. "That's why he all over yo ass."
I rolled my eyes. "Then do a fucking giveaway to get more followers. Count me the fuck out."
Silence ensured for about ten seconds and just when I thought I was about to get back sanity, Lade chose to have a light bulb moment.
"Dude, you're getting some action right. That's why you so headstrong." He yelled.
Seriously? I groaned. He had to be fucking kidding me.
"Who's she?" He continued. "Shorty from the bowling alley?"
Mum had dropped me off at the bowling alley last two weeks, and had disappeared with my cellphone and wallet. I had to stick with these fools till she came back.
"You done?" I asked, picking up the dumbbell, this time, with my left hand.
"Damn! I was going to hit it off with her after at Babe's party tonight. Bro, you a sheep in wolf clothing!"
I let out a stressed breath. Look at someone who has a girlfriend.
Leave it to Lade to be a proud, award winning man-whore.
"You can hit it off all you want. I've even forgotten what she looks like."
Lade let out a whistle. "That quick? Sly bastard. I'ma start learning work from you!"
I rolled my eyes for the tenth time. Someone give this guy a brain.
"No man." Khalid interrupted once more. "That means virgin boy didn't hit her up."
Asshole. "Fuck you Khalid."
"Bro you pretty, but no thanks."
I rolled my eyes. Trust this fool to have waiting comebacks for every jab.
"But she said she was tryna get to know my friend first." Lade thought out loud.
"And she's coming with someone too." He continued. "But you know, that's bullshit. She's just tryna play."
Another five seconds silence.
"Nah bro. She's not playing anything." Khalid interrupted, again. "She's coming with me."
I let out another stressed sigh. This is going to take a while.
"Dude what the fuck!" Lade growled, almost damaging my eardrum. "I fucking told you about her!"
"Sorry. Finders, keepers." Khalid sang out.
See, too much drama.
That was my que to hang up.
After hanging up, I dropped the dumbbell and stood up.
I'd exceeded my time in the gym and mum would be back in an hour. I didn't want her drilling me with her scrutinising eyes if she found me a sweaty mess.
I grabbed a towel and a water bottle, uncapping it, I took a big gulp, then another, until I emptied it. I just needed a cold bath and good food, then I'll be out of mum's list tonight.
Was about to dump the used towel into the hamper when my eyes caught the shirt I wore out two days ago and immediately, what came to my mind was her.
I'd tried to answer one question ever since I dropped her and her brother off, but couldn't.
Why the hell did I let her hitch a ride?
I just didn't have a definite answer.
Maybe because I saw her looking distressed and so out of it after hearing her laugh like she had zero worries or maybe, it was something else.
Sympathy? Benevolence?
Damn, I wasn't even close to being sympathetic or benevolent! Khalid once said I could pass a dying man and wouldn't give two fucks cos I was always minding my business.
Groaning for the umpteenth time that day, I kicked the damn basket. I was thankful she didn't recognize me, thankful I'd slid on the shirt once I'd left the beach. If not, that would have been a whole different case.
I didn't want to come off as a creep who'd stared at her and was also offering her a ride.
Shaking off the chills that ran down my body, I headed to the bathroom. The island was big enough to keep us in separate locations. I hoped, crossing my fingers and counting on never seeing her again.
After a quick bath, I headed downstairs and straight to the kitchen on only a grey sweatpant.
Mum would flip if she found me shirtless in the middle of her sacred kitchen.
She'd start her sixty minutes lecture on blood, bones and cold weathers.
Mrs Mary, our house keeper had already prepared dinner and it was only four-thirty. Mum loved having dinner at six, anything more would have her stuffing fruits into her body. I guess keeping fit came with a price.
I opened the first stainless lid and holy shit! My nose got assaulted with an aroma that could cause worms to leap for joy.
She'd prepared fishstew. A favorite of mum and I.
I didn't need a soothsayer to let me know that there was vegetable and egg sauce and white rice next to it.
Sitting down, I stacked my plate and was set to dig in before Mrs Mary entered the kitchen, all dressed and ready to leave.
"Good evening ma." I greeted, with my mouth full. Table manners flying off the window.
She smiled fondly at me, as she took in the sight of me enjoying her food.
Mrs Mary was a woman of few words and that was one out of the numerous reasons why I liked her. She wasn't a chatterbox like most house keepers were, she reserved that energy to make the meanest dishes.
Although she had no blood ties with us, mum treated her like family and since we weren't in touch with our relatives in Nigeria, mum usually invited her and her family over during festive periods.
I wasn't complaining. As far they knew their limits with me.
"Evening Soma. How's the food?"
"Delicious!" I mouthed, giving her a thumbs up.
"I'm glad you like it." She beamed. "Eat slowly dear."
I grinned, while she headed to the sink.
"You going already?"
"Yes." She answered, while washing her hands. She always did that. "See you tomorrow."
After drying her hands, she turned to me.
"Lock up."
I nodded, not bothering to correct her that the Baba would see to it.
After eating to my satisfaction, I craved a fresh drink which led me to the fridge. Where I laid my eyes to my greatest nightmare.
I might be exaggerating a little, but God, I hated shopping malls.
On the fridge was a sticky note, with mum's handwriting listing out orders.
Annoyed, I snagged it off. Reading through it.
Kellogg's cereal
Detergent (Waw and max)
A dozen of liquid milk (not almond Soma!)
Auntie's wheat biscuit
Peanut butter (Max)
Chocolate bars (no fruit and nuts Soma!)
Seedless grapes
Ps- I need the grapes urgently!
Was she kidding me? She could easily drop by the mall and get them on her way back.
Groaning out in frustration, I headed to my room, grabbed a shirt and car keys before hitting the mall.
•••
The mall was like five streets away from away from my house but that didn't stop me from taking the car.
I walked along each shelf, going through the list in my hand.
Where the hell can I get a quality Chocolate bar?
Mum had a preference which was Cadbury. Too bad she wasn't the only one craving Cadbury chocolates on the Island, cos there was nothing but limited number of Cadbury chocolates at the mall. And that was an even bigger problem for me.
God knows I love mum, but she was just a deeply stuck stick in my ass.
Laying my hands on the last three Cadbury chocolates on a rack, I threw them into my basket before picking them up again.
She said no fruit and nut.
Unfortunately, one had fruit and nut, shortening them to two.
I sighed, giving up.
I just needed to throw in a few M&M's and get going.
Sighting a jumbo pack and feeling my headache begin to subside, I made my way to it.
And just when I thought I was the only one eying the damn chocolate, another hand snatched it off.
God why! I almost screamed.
Turning to walk away, a hand grabbed my shirt.
"You!"
I froze. I knew that tiny voice.
"Somadina right? Black Rover guy?"
The annoying girl with the cute brother.
I turned around as she let go of my shirt. She wasn't dressed in beach wears this time. She had on, real clothes.
A sky blue crop top and a boyfriend jean, held by a wide, stone studded black belt.
Not bad.
She was smiling.
"Hey." She had a basket filled with junk. Edible ones.
She raised the bag of chocolate beads.
"You really want it?"
I rolled my eyes. Of course, I wouldn't have reached for it if I didn't.
"Yeah." I headed to another direction and she followed suit.
She dropped the bag of chocolate beads inside my basket.
"Thanks."
"I see you still have a limited vocabulary." She smiled. "I've not seen you here before. Do you come by often?"
We queued up in the short line. I sighed out in relief. I was glad the line wouldn't take forever before I got attended to and away from her.
Do you know every single customer here? I wanted to ask back. But that would make room for more conversation and I wasn't about to have that.
Listening to Lade and Khalid was enough for the day.
I'd been a perfect gentleman by letting her cut into the line and that should be enough friendliness.
But she just had to turn over, that too friendly smile gracing her face.
"Why do you do that?"
Confused, I blinked at her. "Do what?"
"Act like no one matters," she mused for a while. While I waited for the cashier to hurry the fuck up. "Like you just wanna be alone and away from everyone around you."
She got that and yet, she wouldn't leave me the fuck alone?
Seemed like the week had me slated for insufferable situations.
I ignored her, hoping she'd get the memo and let me be. And for a while that worked when she got attended to and left the line.
After the cashier had sorted out everything I took my purchases and left the cold mall.
The crescent moon was already peeking out of the dark clouds when I stepped out. Dark clouds battled with blue ones, as night time drew near.
A cold wind swept by, carrying my frustrations with it as I spotted my ride. Walking to it, I unlocked the back seat, dumbing the bags in.
Was about to reach for the door before I saw her again, walking towards me.
God! Does she ever give up?
"You didn't answer my question." She said casually, once she reached where I stood. Making herself comfortable as she leaned on my ride.
Her full hair was backed into a bun this time, with curly ringlets at both sides of her face.
Besides being annoying, she was cute. Though she had nothing on her little brother.
She had chocolate skin that reminded me of refined cocoa. Dark and rich. It shun under the spray of the moon's light.
Her heart shaped face, clear and unpainted, housing charming dimples at both sides. Her small lips had the right amount of gloss on them. She looked fifteen, if I didn't see the caliber of friends she hung out with.
And the next thought that ran through my mind was how not only her hair, but her face would look on a white canvas, with grey shadings and brushes bringing her to life.
"What?" I unlocked the car, before facing her.
"Why you purposely ignore people. That's being outrightly rude, whether it's intentional or not. You know that?"
I sighed. "What's in for you if I answer anyway?"
Shrugging, she grinned, shamelessly flashing dimples everywhere, it was hard to get annoyed at her.
"Nothing, I'm just curious that's all."
I rolled my eyes. "Your curiosity isn't going to kill cats. It'll just bore them. Drop it will you."
"Nope."
I fought back a groan.
"Fine." I sighed. "What do you want?"
She grinned, uncrossing her arms. "Easy. A reasonable conversation."
I rolled my eyes at the attitude. "And what does a reasonable conversation sound like?"
She shrugged. "You know, you should have been like; hey, Didi right? The cute girl with the cuter brother. The one I gave a ride. Something to spark some familiarity. I honestly thought you didn't recognize me."
Too much talking.
Oh God, was that a dream or something?
"Look," I began, not knowing how to respond. The headache was fucking coming back and I didn't want to come off as rude. I usually didn't care about being rude. "Next time," which would never happen. I'll personally look out for her and avoid her like the plague. "I'll take your advice. We good now?"
She shook her head. "No."
"What do you fucking want?!" I growled out, hanging on a thin thread of patience.
She pouted. "Jeez chill. Someone would think I'm a thirsty bitch." She smirked when I showed my obvious discomfort. "Heniway, there's a come all party at a friend's place. You wanna hop along?"
Oh that explains all the edible junks.
"No." I declared, entering the car.
"Jeez. You should have at least feigned to think about it before replying so blatantly."
Rolling my eyes, I shut the door, hopefully on her face.
It was too early to breath out in relief, when she knocked at the tinted window of my ride.
I rolled down the glass, raising my brow impatiently. "What now?"
"Just a friendly advise." She smirked. "You can't get laid with that kind of attitude."
With that, she skipped off, leaving me more mortified than I've ever been in weeks.
I fucking hope I never run into her again
•••