It was like a dream. It was like my soul separated from its physical anchor; floating higher and higher watching everything unfold play by play, in horror. Each gut-wrenching sob sending me further and further into the sky, until I was just another cloud floating in the atmosphere. The whole time my soul floated further out of my reach, it was like my whole being faded in and out of focus. Like I was there but I wasn't, unsure if this was reality or just another nightmare I couldn't escape. All I could hear was the static buzzing in my ears, so overwhelming and so... so loud. The feeling of each breath ragged, labored, painfully ripped out of my lungs into the air we could no longer share together. The feeling of apathy, fluid and icy cold slithering through my veins, its grip tight, painful, and unrelenting against my heart. The perfect barrier between me and the world, isolating against pain, sorrow, and loss. Things I refuse to ever allow myself to feel again, the barrier a perfect façade for the world, a simple trick. It's my burden and I will bear it alone; its fine, I'm fine, everything is fine.