Childhood

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My childhood wasn't exactly a good one, filled with memories of family gatherings and hope. Mine was almost the exact opposite. I was born a twin, with my sister Junko. If you've never been a twin you wouldn't know this but, theres always a better twin. A more shiny, loveable twin. That of course, was Junko. But I couldn't blame here, she was extremely beautiful with the brains to match. But, under that beauty and greatness was a void of despair. We both had it. But, mine was a bit more noticeable.

Of course, hiding that raging despair wasn't easy for Junko, so she took it out on me. I deserved it though, I'd never by as full of despair as her, or able to hide it as well. But I still admired her. Her and mother were definitely the superiors in the family. Both beautiful and smart, they really brought attention at family gatherings. Not like we had many of those. My father on the other hand, was always less than Mother. I used to pity him, until I learned he pitied my also. There was one memory that will always fill me with hope. I remember it quite clearly.

Junko and Mother were out shopping, like daughter and Mothers should. She'd forgotten me of course, but I'd rather slink into the shadows of our home than go out. Father was getting ready to go out, and I was naturally forced to go with him instead. He took me to a shooting range. It was a placed he used to get away from the family. This particular day he asked if I wanted to join. I reluctantly said yes out of pity, and grabbed the nearest gun and blindly aimed it at a target it. I turned to go back to the car to wait, but I felt two strong hands wrap behind me in a hug from behind . I turned my head to see it was Father. I was confused, until i saw the target. There was a dent right in the middle, and it took me a while realise I was the one who had shot it.

Father lifted my off my feet and hugged me tighter. And for the first time, I hugged him back. It was the first time I had felt the warm glow of hope. But only for a moment.

After that Father took me to combat lesson whenever he could. I did enjoy them, but only when i saw the look on my opponents face when I beat them. Considering I was quite small for my age, and the only girl, they always underestimated me. But they didn't soon. Even though I was growing tired of those classes, beating people week after week, I still went. I could see the hope in Fathers face when he drove me home, when he smiled at me with pity. I thought he loved me, I was wrong of course.

It was when we went on a holiday I learned the truth. Junko was putting me down again, and like always I stood there and took it. After all, I'm just a lesser version of her. Mother came in and was pleased to watch me suffer. Then Father came into the room, he went to tell Junko to stop, but Mother stopped him. He did, and just stood there watching instead with a pitiful look on his face.

I was mad, he was just a little pebble in my way anyways. He didn't love me, he pitied me. Mother hated me. But Junko loved me. Bullying me gave her despair, which she loved. I decided then I would show him. I was not someone to pity. So I ran away to Fenrir, an army group for two years. They didn't care. But I would show them. And I did. By killing them.

Junko still put me down, saying I was the disappointment of the family. But I was overjoyed that she cared. She then asked to be apart of something called a killing game. I didn't know what it was, but anything to show Junko how strong I was. And how full of despair I was... 

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