Lucien looked down on his leather suitcase, filled with plenty of books and an old whiskey he took from his family mansion. He had promised his mother not to get into trouble, he really wanted to,but only the pain of the whiskey could turn his sorrows into physical pain and then he could forget.
During his time in prison, he would wake up in the middle of the night, drenched in sweat, wondering if he had anyone to hold onto. Regretting every life decision he had made. Those nights were the worst, when all he could think of was Allen's betrayel. The one and only person he fell for, he trusted and loved, had left him. Sometimes Allen and David were occuring in his dreams, David asking what he had done to him and Allen shaking his head whilst repeating:'' he loved you and once, you loved him back''.
The shriking sound of the train's whistle suddenly threw him back to reality. It was time to get out. Boston was not too far from New York, yet it appeared to be different- less dark and mysterious- like a fresh breeze in spring. Lucien glanced out of his taxi into the bright blue sky. Maybe it really was a fresh start. Maybe he was destined to have a normal life.He exhaled deeply as he entered the ivy covered gates of Harvard. Since he was released from prison, his mother hugged him tight and promised him to be there for him, to help him start a new life. And then she bought him into another ivy league university and told him to leave, as soon as he was released . Oh, how sweet the irony was. After all his life was a circle and not even manslaughter could disrupt it.
As he walked up the wooden stairs to his assigned dorm room, Lucien's worries were flashing around in his mind, relentlessly coming back. He opened the door to reveal a large bedroom for one. His mother always gave him enough money for him to live comfortably. After hanging his clothes and storing his books, he set up his typewriter and hesitated . The last time he had written poetry was on the night when Allen kissed him. The sheet of work was still stuck in there. It read
what do you feel,
why did you fall
for someone so broken
relentlessly hurting you.
Only for your pure heart to deteriorate
into a state like mine
His eyes scanned trough the lines, reading them as if he had to satisfy his starving hunger for... what? He stared at the lines until they blurry.
YOU ARE READING
ocean eyes and raven hair
FanfictionHaving spent eight months in prison for the killing of his former molester David, Lucien Carr is forced to return to his normal life. This time, his wealthy yet distanced mother sends him to the prestigious Harvard University .In order to enable hi...
