-Pissed? -Very!

Warning:
         1. Restricted to weak hearted people.
        2. Restricted to OCDs.
        3. Unrecommended if there is a tendency to cringe at weird.
        4. Avoidable if "out of the box" is not acceptable.
        5. But if unnatural liking for unreasonable fun and signing up for weird shits is   your fashion, THIS IS YOUR THING!!!
        NB: If you still decide to read on, don't blame me later that I didn't warn.
                                                                         **~**

9 August, Thursday (before class)
Ren
I asked her in a hushed voice, " Did you bring it?"
I could tell from her expression that she didn't. Damn it! I knew she wouldn't. Okay. I'll just say that I didn't too.
"Did you?" she inquired back.
I'm not idiot enough to answer that first.
"You didn't, right? I knew you wouldn't bitch..." she babbled on.
"Shut up. Just tell me you did or not." I pressed.
She didn't reply, but her mischievous eyes were answer enough.
"Whoa, you did?????"
"Why, you didn't?" she sounded horrified.
I thanked the Lord (who couldn't care less) for a friend like her.
"Yes! Hell, yes I did you bitch. I love you dude! I love you so much."
I was literally 2 seconds away from kissing her on the mouth but she gave me this disgusted look which calmed me down. For now.
.......
We could talk about anything, but we decided to talk about "Paper Towns". And it would be great if we were talking about the characters, the ending, the prologue or whatever, but we decided to talk about the part where the four characters were in the car driving straight for almost 24 hours and were forced to pee in little soda bottles. And from there, we had this conversation:
Zif: Ever pissed in a bottle?
Ren: Um...nope. But pissed in a test tube once. You know for diagnosing urine infection. I was a kid then.
Zif: That's pretty common. But the bottle idea is kinda innovative.
Ren: You ever did it?
Zif: Nope, not really. Well, it's no big deal. We can always do it and then maybe bring the bottles in the school and mix the piss?
Ren: What? Serious? Hey, wanna do it?
Zif: Wait, you do? I don't have a problem to be honest.
That's how the idea was generated. We could have been kidding, or at least the other one was, for all one of us knew. But probably we both were thinking the same shit, and were like, ARE WE REALLY DOING IT? A very big question mark. We actually said it to another friend too, tried to include her in an attempt of making a threesome of piss, but she showed us a well deserved middle finger. Any sane person would have come to sense by then, but not us. C'mon, on our defence, when did we even claim to be decent? And sometimes it feels like you just need a story to cling on, a story that somehow makes your life worthwhile. And since we lacked any conventional talent, we came up with our own idea of "talent" and decided to do it just for the sake of a story if nothing else. So...after much joking around, laughing our asses off and with a huge confusion on our mind, we parted ways that day with the promise of doing "it" the very next day. Yes readers, you read it right. Promised to pee in bottles and then bring them in the school to mix it together for making a piss cocktail-we did. This was our it.
**~**

9 August, Thursday (1st period- Calculus)
Ren: Just duck and tell me your story already, you shuck!
Zif: What do you even mean? We're in a fucking class for fuck's sake.
Ren: Oh yeah right! I'm so sorry, I totally forgot that you absolutely love calculus, huh?
Zif: Shut the fuck up! Why don't you go first, huh?
Ren: Goodness! Fine bitch, fine! So, well...

The Previous Day (after school)
Ren
Well, why's the shucking door open? Um...is mom sleeping? That's a plus point.
"Ren, please make my coffee and you grab something to eat and dash for the shower. You got 3 tuitions in less than 2 hours, right?"
Is she sleep talking?
"Uh yeah, mom. I do."
"Let me know before you go. I'm taking a nap, not feeling too well."
Could I really be that lucky? "Yeah sure mom, sleep tight."
                                                                                ........
So...gotta pee in a bottle, huh? Let's see what's there to do.
I opened the refrigerator and found the smallest bottle. Well, it contained some water.
"Ren, is this holy water."
"Oh shut up dude, who cares!"
"Ren!"
"It's not, chill."
"For all you know it might be. Don't throw it away you shucking piece of a klunk!"
A great fan of the Glader's language, isn't she?
[Glader's dictionary: shuck=fuck, klunk=crap
Source: "The Maze Runner" by James Dashner]
"Um okay man. You torment me so much!"
So I took the bottle and poured the "probable holy water" into the filter. Oh, by the way, don't creep out. It wasn't a sibling or a friend or God forbid-Zif! It was just me talking to myself.
You know, Zif was about to see my pee and I kinda got self conscious and wanted a clear piss to show off. So what I did is drinking like 10 gallons of water. But I'd be damned if those traitor of the water converted to piss in time. So when I actually went to the shower and pissed in the bottle it came out all um...yellowish. And man, it's hot. No! Not that hot. Just hot hot. As in warm.
                                                                               .......
Well, after pissing I kinda cringed and washed the closed bottle with soap, shampoo, body wash, conditioner, toothpaste, shaving cream and all that you find in the washroom for like 10 times and of course, a considerable amount seeped through the bottle. It's...what-purified piss? Yeah right!
                                                                            **~**