I’m an African American Guyanese lesbian high school softball playing poet. And after all that being said none of you still know a damn thing about me.
I get it America you like your titles and labels they’re easy enough so you don’t have to think too hard.
But understand this I am a complex anomaly. That one spark of lightning that one amazing idea I am a unique kind of beauty
Not the kind you find under hips and thighs or chest, or lips The kind that you find under stone and rock buried deep beneath the ashes and coal because I am a diamond strong bright and beautiful.
And I will not be labeled as anything lesser I will not answer to nigger or curry to fagg to homo to slut or whore to incompetent bitch!
I am me
And just in case you thought you knew my story sit and listen
My father once a boy of Brooklyn became a knight fighting against the stereotypes of a black man, soon to be called a king. An heir to the throne you call the streets
My mother, a Guyanese queen found beauty in her homeland but left magnificence poverty for a family finding a way to live past just surviving
They both brought their prince n princess into this world of chaos. Not knowing of stereotypes or labels they only told me to be happy to be respectful to be healthy to smile like I had a reason to even if I didn’t have a reason to. They said find one.
Now I never lived the life of luxury or gone a day of hunger I was always where humility and gratitude met sacrifice and patience
So don’t you dare think that you can just define me as way to get past my intricate individuality. I will not simplify myself just because you can’t keep up.
I am more than just what my skin holds or who I love I am more than just a woman
I am me
But I apologize if I sound too full of myself too arrogant or cocky honestly I am only brave enough to admit that I am afraid.
I afraid of the future that I can’t understand, of the jobs I won’t have. Of the places I won’t meet or the people I won’t see.
Wait... I’m also afraid that I don’t know enough that my brain won’t take in the right amount of subjects for school that won’t be passed with a perfect A+
I'm afraid that I can't hold my wife’s hand and give her the life and love that she deserves
But most of all i'm afraid that my daughter will one day need me to be her superhero. She’ll look to me and find that i'm only human. And that saving her world is all that I want but I don’t know how to fight my kryptonite
Yeah I’m the first to admit my faults
I’m only human. I’m only what I was made to be. So until I learn how to move the stars until I find a way to push light through the darkness I’ll be here figuring out how to push past what you expect me to be. because i'm more than the labels you tag me with
I am beautifully me try to understand that
