(While reading this, think in your head a gay man is saying it) So there was this ostrich, his name was Ted. He L.O.V.E.D. to go on adventures!!!! So one day he decided to go to New York. But there was a problem. He was an ostrich. People don't let ostriches roam around big cities such as New York. WHO WOULD HAVE THOUGHT!!! Ted had to be sneaky... But there was a freaking problem with that too!! TED WAS TO EFFING BIG TO BE SNEAKY!! Then suddenly a spaceship crashed down to Earth and exploded right in front of Ted and pickles went EVERYWHERE!!! Now listen here, there is little difference between a pickle and a turtle penis. You see, Ted thought they were pickles but they weren't.. Yep you guessed it; they were turtle penises.
Just as Ted was about to take a bite, he thankfully dropped it. See, Ted doesn't have arms, so he had to constantly peck his face on the ground. This gave Ted a black eye. This story is realy stupid. Ted forgot about his pickle/ turtle penis because he had a mild concusion. I just saw a squirrel. Since Ted wasn't exactly in the right mind, he saw a koala pasing the street. He thought 'ohh lala'. This story just keeps getting worse. I can't believe you're still reading this. Seek some help. Please.
THE END
