Holding Back (Lesbian Story)

Why Does Everything Have to be So Complicated?

~Leila~

As she walked down the hall of the hospital, Leila inhaled the sweet fragrance of the pink peonies she held in her hands. It had been two weeks since Maya had been shot, and today was the day that the doctor gave an official release date for Maya. Because Maya was so healthy from being on the track team, Leila and Maya's family were hoping that she could be let out in a matter of a little over two weeks. Already she was able to sit up on her own, and the pain was rapidly decreasing. So much was it declining, in fact, that the doctors were puzzled at the enigma. Maya, however, constantly insisted that it was all thanks to Leila and her unswerving dedication, but the two couldn't come to an agreement over it, and so they left the topic alone.

Leila reached the door to Maya's hospital room and quietly knocked while peeking in with a small, shy smile on her face. Not to her surprise, Maya was sleeping soundly on her bed, with her arm curled around her old teddy bear from when she was little. Apparently Maya had grown up with "Mr. Cuddlesworth," and couldn't sleep without him... even though Leila noticed that she had slept pretty soundly the second night in the hospital when her arms were around Leila instead. The nurse, Mrs. Bailey, who was attending Maya had let it slip that night because of the given circumstances, but after that, she was vigilant in kicking Leila out promptly at eight every night. Both Maya and Leila figured it was because she had walked in on them being quite a bit more intimate than usual best friends are, and disapproved of their conduct. Thankfully though, Mrs. Bailey didn't voice her opinions aloud, and kept to herself when Leila was visiting.

Leila crept quietly into the room and set the peonies on the table next to Maya's bed. By Maya's bedside were a pile of gifts and balloons from friends and family who had visited Maya shortly after she was shot, as well as cards and ironically, Bertie Bott's Every Flavor Beans. Gio and Carmen were most likely the culprits of that gift, as they had visited as often as possible (although they didn't yet know about Maya and Leila being together), and had constantly made Harry Potter hospital references. Seeing that Maya appeared to be far off in dreamland, Leila grabbed a pen and paper from the drawer in the stand and wrote a note saying that she would be back when Maya woke up and not to fret her pretty head off about it if Leila wasn't there right away. She then kissed the note, set it down by the flowers, and kissed Maya on the cheek slowly and sweetly before heading out of the room once more and turning down the hallway to the right.

This was the moment she feared the most. Technically she and Zack were still together, and still in love with each other- some might have even said destined to be the one high school sweetheart couple to survive after senior year. But Leila knew better. She knew that their time was over, no matter how much they still loved one another, no matter what it meant to their friendship; she had to end it as soon as possible. However, she was still trapped in the delusional bubble that she and Zack created so many months ago when they started dating and broke the 'best-friendship barrier.' Zack was still in a coma, and Leila couldn't bring herself to be public with Maya until she had resolved her relationship with her best friend first. They had grown up together, played 'house' together, and had loved together. The least she could do was give him a stable, non-confusing, non-stressful wake up from his coma when that finally happened. She couldn't bear the thought of him waking up only to find that he was completely and utterly alone in the world, and she knew that if Zack were in her situation, he would do the exact same thing for her; wait for her to come to, no matter how much time it took.

As Leila drew nearer and nearer to the door that Mrs. Grey had given her directions to, Leila grew extremely nervous. She hadn't seen Zack yet, as he had been in isolation since the shooting, and only now were visitors allowed, even if he couldn't hear or see them. Gio, who had become really close with Zack over the past few months, had already visited and wasn't even able to tell Leila what to expect, as he was too choked up too talk when he had spoken to Leila earlier that day. He was usually a pretty reserved guy, and when it came to emotional situations, he tried to avoid crying as much as possible.