My Only Hope.

Chapter 3

After my plane landed I took a taxi to go home. I couldn't believe I was back here. I promised I wouldn't put my foot back here again. Not after the painful decision Matt made me do. He flashed in my mind. Oh, that bown hair and hazel eyes. It made me go crazy. I remembered how messed up his hair would look like after we woke from a 'busy night'. The laughs that we shared was the best part of our relationship. He made me so happy. Matt was my first in everything. My first kiss. My first boyfriend. My first to lose my virginity with. I thought I would love him for the rest my life but after him making me choice between my modeling career in NYC or him, I was very uncertain on those feelings. Jason made me forget him, that's way I loved Jason so much. He made me love again even though that came with some physical and emotional abuse. I didn't think coming back to Texas would mix with my feelings. But it did. What if Matt is still here? What if he changed his mind? What if he is gonna accept me for who i am? For the decisions I made.

"STOP!" I accidentally yelled out loud to myself.

"Sorry." I told the man driving the taxi.

"We are here anyways man." he replied.

I quickly paid him and got out of the car with my luggage.

I'm here. After years and years, Im finally home. I walked to the door and knocked. Hopefully my mom got my message even though she is still trying to figure out how to text back.

The door opened with a older lady that I slowly recognized. My mom.

"Oh my God, sweetie I can't believe you're home!!" my mom said hugging me tightly.

"Me neither." I said, trying to hold in the tears.

"Tell me everything about Jason, Paris, New York. Everything." she said

"Mom, there's something I need to sa--"

"Kourt!!! I'm so glad you're home!" my dad yelled running to me. He hugged me and I hugged him back.

"Sweetie are you okay?"

I nodded.

"I stink don't I? I'm sorry. I was going to take a shower anyways." He laughed.

"Dad, no. You don't--"

It was too late he ran upstairs.

"Kourt tell me what's going on" my mom said sadly.

"Let me go unpack. I'll tell you and dad everything"

With that I ran upstairs. I entered the room on the right. Man, I haven't been in here for years. My bed was made and it looked so perfect like no one has even touched it since I was gone for the last 5 years. I put my luggage down when I noticed the pile of ripped pictures on the floor. Yup, my room was untouched since I left. I picked up the pictures, fitting the pieces together. Memories flooded back to me. Matt and me. We were so happy I thought when I looked at the picture of me and him at the beach. I could feel the tears coming up. No, enough crying Kourtney. You're done with boys. Matt is probably happily married and doesn't want anything to do with you, I thought. I regert leaving him so much but I had to follow my dreams with or without him.

"Kourt, dinners ready!!" my mom yelled.

I ran downstairs. I sat down in my regular sit. My mom sat next to me and my dad in front of me. I was an only child. It was very hard for my parents to let me go. Especially to live In a big city. Alone

"We made your favorite!!" my mom said, bringing the beef and her signature mashed potatoe. Oh, how much I missed this.

We dug in right away.

"Kourt, it's so good to have to back home. It killed me to not see you step in this house the last few years. It was hard, it really was." He said with pain in his voice.

"I missed you guys so much." I said honestly. I didn't have any family in New York besides Jason and there's no way I'm letting that abusive jerk in my life again.

"So, you never said why you came back." my mom said.

I slowly stirred my food, feeling my appetite going away. It's time just spill it out.

"Jason turned out to be a obessed, abusive douchebag. You guys were right about him. I'm scared he's going to come back. He punched me in the face. You can't see it now because I'm using so many creams to get it off. He hurt me, Mom. I don't want him in my life and I have a feeling he's going to come back and who knows what the hell he'll do to me." I said letting everything out, including the tears.

"Sweetie--"

"I'm not done. I never told anyone but he sexually abused me when I didn't want to have sex with that asshole. But I couldnt help it. I loved him. I wanted to see him happy even if it meant using my body. it's disgusting. Coming back to Texas brought so many memories back about me and Matt. Matt was gentle and sweet unlike Jason but Jason helped me forget Matt. I don't know if I should love Jason for doing that because I still love Matt." I said crying, admitting my love to Matt. I've held it in for the past 5-6 years.

"I swear Kourt if he does anything to you and I mean anything. I will rip his guts out, buy some pitbulls and feed it to them." my dad said angrily.

"Kourtney, we are here for you. Dont worry, sweetie, we'll protect you." my mom said pulling me out of my sit and bringing me in for a hug.

"Thanks." that was all I could get out.

My mom looked at my dad.

"Ron, I think it's time to show her the letters."

"What letters?"

Silence.

"What letters?!?!"

My mom left and brought a handful of letters.

"Go upstairs and read everyone of them. Please, it's for your best."

"Who wrote them?" I asked.

"Matt."

~~~~~

I will post a picture of Jason and Matt next chapter. Hope you enjoy it. (;