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Walking around with this painted face.
A clown! They may say.
A fake! They may shout.
Hiding my true identity
to the vicious world outside.
I thrive on seeing your face
though you are not a lover
Nor a friend.
You are the murderer of my soul,
The murderer of my peace and freedom.
Trapped in this injurious mind
I see things now,
see things others do not,
It is the curse you have given me.
A pressure I cannot shake off,
a suffocation which loathes me not.
Far from reality is where I wish to be,
Dreaming of a better day,
Dreaming of a better place.
A menacing fear grows inside me,
a fear of what I can do
or, a fear of you.
The satisfying pleasure of your blood on my hands.
The heavens have broken
But oh
My sweetheart,
My dearest darling
You are my precious hell.
Look at me now.
