I am a person. I am a human being of the world. I dont know what its all about, and i am not a fictional character. I am
Internal-storm
I am real hands on a key board, i have cried before, i have laughed as well. which ever i have done most in my life is yet to be deturmined as they have been in equall amounts recently. I see and hear and breathe anddoandfeelandrememberandthink...
Such amazing things.
But you still do not know me. you can not sence my presence among strangers nor know how i think, what i say, how i act. maybe you really do know me. maybe you dont. sometimes i just share classes with you. maybe secrets, maybe love, maybe joy. maybe nothing but a smile. or a insult, or a punch. words do nothing but
Limit us.
if i think, i think orange i thing gold, i think blue you do not know the shade. but most importantly if i think 'sad' i am depressed. i am not right. i am sick, wrong. i am changed by drugs, medicine, i am effected for the rest of my life from a perscription. maybe i am depressed. but i am not wrong, i am not sick. my thoughts are my thoughts. im not shrugging them offf with any amount of milliliters. even if depressing, any though of mine,
Is better than a number or word
summer is a word, its a season. its hot and vacation time. is it really? we never think of the same thing when even the same word is spoken. i think of bordom and sweaty legs on sticky car seats. the salt of the beach and sweat and the echoing of wind through my ear drum, lawn mowers and the slick glistening leaves of flordia trees. thoose who are away from my home state, may think of acctually being warm, happy memories i will never share with you. how can we
Forget these things?
words are nothing but letters, nothing but ways to communicate. they are not life. i could never decribe life in simple words. i am often at a loss at words and it is bliss. i told you who i was, i told you i was depressed. but do you know what i think, what i have done to myself, what hurts inside me? but thats okay. words cannot control it all, if they could name
Everything, we would have nothing
but there is this in you too. i dont know you at all, you are a stranger to me, we could know eachother since sixth, first, preschool. you are far from the real me. but thats nothing i hold back from people. its the way it is. all i know is that you are
Amazing
you random internet going stranger has something someone else is looking for. im not saying this to be nice to whoever reads this. i might hate you, but i share truth with you today. you and me and them and we are people. we are human beings of the
World, and you are amazing
what does each word i say to you mean? something different then i mean them. i think of recently being diagnosed with depression. you might think about those cigaretes, that mom, that freind, that achohal that dad. sadly, more
Often then not
we only live by words. we live by stupid labels given to use by useless people. i am words like "fat, stupid, ugly, bad at this, bad at that, a bitch, a whore, a idiot" but i am not that definition. i am a sister, a thought, a daughter, a poet, and artist. im a comedian and musician. i am not talking to a loser, a fatty, or anything like that. im talking to whoever is reading this right now. you must
Remember who you really are, who they dont know. take your thoughts and start
Doing something. because i am an author, and a poet. not a tittle.
the tittle of this is depression, but not what i wrote. the bold letters read is life a word. if you read this for its tittle, because your sad or like sad things this was speciffically a peice for you. now go out into the world and think it to yourself. all that which cannot be put into words, and can only be you own.
to someone specific:
(YOU ARE LOVED. PFT. YOU ARE OKAY. YOU ARE AMAZING. BUT AMAZING IS ONLY A WORD, AND YOU ARE SO MUCH MORE.)
