The Purging of Ruen - Abridged.

Chapter 1

In which Oscar Teabag-Doven battles a misguided echelon of authoritative animals to save a beautiful city from certain destruction. 

When ordered to uncover the source of brewing tensions in the exclusive seaside city of Ruen. Oscar Teabag-Dooven discovers it is on the brink of tearing itself place apart. The dramas therein draw him into a most scandalous plot of insanity, intrigue, and greed-and at one point a large number of hessian bags.

"After reading this, I don't necessarily see book-burning as a bad thing."

- David E. Stangways.

Play the video and read along.

"Courage: a modesty born from fear,

and any animal who boasts of bravery

knows the meaning of neither."

- The Loud Purr of Asquith.

OSCAR drummed his paws on the reception desk. "I think I'm about to be expelled," he said.

The receptionist looked up at him. "I'm sorry?"

"I think," said Oscar, "that I've been summoned here to be expelled."

"Expelled?"

"Yes."

She frowned. "What on earth makes you think that, Mister Dooven?"

"The last five weeks, for a start."

"But you've been on holiday for four of them."

"I sat in my living room with the blinds drawn."

"That doesn't sound like much of a holiday."

"Well, it was," said Oscar, "considering the week prior to it."

"I'm sure you're not about to be expelled, Mister Dooven. The notion's quite ridiculous."

"Then why do I feel as though I want to bring up my breakfast?"

"Was it a particularly bad breakfast, perhaps?"

"I haven't had any breakfast," said Oscar. "That's the problem; I couldn't eat on account of my concerns about being expelled."

"Well, maybe you should have breakfast," the receptionist said. "I can have some buns sent up if you like. The Loud Purr hasn't arrived yet. You might be waiting for some time."

"No thank you," said Oscar. "I couldn't eat a thing."

"What about a hot-fin?"

"No. I fear I'd vomit it all over his carpet."

"I could ask them to include a bucket?"

"It's very kind of you," said Oscar, "but I think it's best if my stomach remains just as bereft of hope as the rest of me."

She frowned again. "I must say, Mister Dooven, your concern is surprising. I would have thought you'd be encouraged to be summoned to the Lair under the circumstances."

"Circumstances?"

"Yes," she said. "The ones revolving around you having just saved the world."

Oscar looked at his paws. "The problem with saving the world is that I may have broken most of it in the process."