Holiday Angst with a Parasite

Papyrus was excited as he stares at the Christmas tree. Smiling at everyone. "Wowie! Santa will love the tree this year!!" He says with a bright welcoming smile. Fresh stood beside Error and chuckled "Haha heck ya bruh" because lets be honest. He and Papyrus were both 100% sure the jolly man existed. Error rolled his eyelights and TRTL bounced with joy. Giggling, Sans yawned and leaned against a wall.

"We going to start watching Christmas specials? So we can get to sleep early so Santa comes?" He says, he really just wanted to get it over with. Not really enjoying the specials as much as he used to. TRTL immediately nyoomed to the couch. Getting comfy in a spot. Papyrus nods and runs into the kitchen to snatch the cocoa he made for everyone. Fresh and Error sat on the floor as Papyrus handed out mugs. TRTL moves and Fell flops beside him, Papyrus squeezing onto the couch and Sans onto his lazy boy. Fresh wrapped a blanket around himself and Error. Sipping his Cocoa. Error downed his and fell asleep before the specials had started.

During it Fresh was happy. Wide smiled and happily pointing things out. Everyone seemed to be happy. Sans half napping Half awake on the couch. Fell interested as he had not watched such non-violent specials before, and TRTL curled up, giggling at any bad jokes. Papyrus was also obviously very jittery and giggly. Christmas being his favorite holiday. Fresh hadn't ever celebrated Christmas with anyone before- disclosing that one Christmas party he attended. He barely remembered it. That had been the only one he was really invited to. And even then he can't remember if he was TECHNICALLY invited. So he was very excited for this. To be with people he was close with.

Once the specials were over he smiled as he watched Papyrus bring TRTL and Fell upstairs for bed. Papyrus himself was going to sleep on the couch, ready to sleep Deeply for the night so Santa would arrive. Sans went up to tuck them in and Fresh picked up Error and brought him to his room. Putting him to bed and leaving to his own room. Saying goodnight to Papyrus before he did. Fresh entered his room and smiled. Turning off his light and watching the nightlight shine through the room. He hopped to his floor mattress and hopped on. Curling up halfway in the hole on his bed.

His mind started to wonder

He. Isn't apart of this family. He's not even a sans! He's a parasite. Errors a sans. Fells a Sans. TRTL's a sans. In a way they're real family. He doesn't belong does he? Sure friends spend time with friends sometimes in Christmas. But when it's a family. They want to chill alone. He stared at the ceiling. Sniffing a little. Wanting to wipe these bad thoughts away!

He just wanted to act cool. To stop feeling this way all the time. This emotion was sadness right? And he hated it! Every time he thinks he's fine he remembers he's not. He has NO family! He has no real friends. He claws into his arms. Sniffling more and standing. Walking out of his room and slowly trotting downstairs. His body shaking as he sneaks out of the house, careful not to wake papyrus. Not noticing sans perking up from the tree.

He goes on the stairs of the porch and sits. Bursting into silent messy tears. Why did they even want him here? They deserved a good Christmas celebration. Without him. They'd have more fun. He'd probably make things weird right? He was a mess. Folding his glasses and staring at them. Tears falling down his synthetic skull.

"Hey... fresh" a deep voice came from the door. He perked up and rubbed the tears away. Shoving his glasses on. Looking back.

"H-huh o-oh hey sans!" He smiled wide. Pretending to be okay. Sans shuffles and moves over. Sitting beside him and taking out a vape pen. Fresh making a face at it but refusing to smack it away.

Sans looks at him. Blinking. "You okay...?" He asks. Voice soft with a slight whisper. Fresh gulping and smiling..

"Haha yea bro! I just love the Christmas feelin of the cold outside!"

"You're shaking like you're being dipped in an ice cold river... Fresh tell me what's wrong."

Fresh stared. Face dropping a bit as he looked away. Hand moving and scratching under his collar. Unsure if he should tell him. Sans hated him right?. "Why do you care."

"If you're all sad on Christmas day Paps not gonna have a good Christmas. And also you know. I know what sadness is like. It sucks." Fresh looks at him.

Sans shuffles. Blowing out some vapor. "You can trust me not to tell anyone"

Fresh could sense that he wasn't lying. He looked down at his feet. Everything silent for a solid five minutes. Fresh taking an anxious breath and looking over. Tears beginning to edge his sockets again. "W-well I just. I don't belong here. I ain't fam. I never will be a-and I don't wanna ruin y-ya'll's Christmas." He sniffled. Sans listening intently.

"A-and I just - I'm scared I'll f-fuNk up and and that I'll m-make the Christmas day sh-shizzy" tears begin to poor. His nervous anxiety filled shake returning.

"I-i can handle an-another Christmas a-alone"

He rambled on. Soon growing incoherent as he sobbed. Sans putting a hand to his shoulder. "Fresh..."

Ramble. "Fresh"

More rambling-- "FRESH" he paused. Whimpering and looking at sans. Sans moved up and removed the glasses. Turning to him more.

"I understand. You're scared. But you do know you ARE family in some way right? Papyrus thinks of you as a brother. And just because you say some rude stuff or insensitive things doesn't mean anything. I do that shit too"

Fresh wiped a socket. The soul glimmering and eye light shining. "You are family. And hell the Christmas wouldn't be the same without you. And I'm pretty sure Error is going to be excited to spend your first Christmas together here. He has been non stop talking about it. Alright?" He said. Fresh nodding a little.

Sans sighed. "Don't worry. We want you here. Even I want you here. It's okay to not be okay. You're getting used to this all. But don't worry. You're family here. And sometimes you might doubt that. But it's fine. You'll always have people to talk to."

Fresh cried more and hugged sans. Sans slightly hugging back. Patting him. Fresh cried until he couldn't cry anymore. Ten minutes had past before sans finally pulled away. "How about you go sleep with Error. If he wakes up just be honest. Tell him. He'll help" he looked close to tears as well. Fresh nodded and stood. Sans following. Making a 'shh? Motion as they entered the home silently.

Sans relocked the door. Fresh slowly going back upstairs. Waving and smiling. He would tell sans thank you later. Going upstairs and nudging into his boyfriends room. Slowly walking in and into the bed. Curling up to the other. Who shifted and awoke a bit. "Fresh?"

"Hey babe" he said calmly. The confused sleepy glitch nuzzling up and giving him a small kiss. Sending a soft happy feeling running through him. "W-why are ya in here?"

Fresh looking at the tired skele. Debating. "I uh. Got a little anxious. Doubtful. Thought it would feel better to cuddle you"

"Oh...Why were you worried n stuff?" He yawns. Nuzzling closer. Fresh ends up explaining. The glitch listening quietly. He moved and wrapped his arms around fresh. Hugging closer. He kissed him lovingly for a moment.

"You don't know how mad I'd be if you left without saying anything , Fresh. Even if they don't want you I NEED you for Christmas. Who else am I supposed to kiss under a mistletoe" he huffed. Making fresh giggle a little. Error kissing his cheekbone.

"Seriously though... don't worry"

"Okay..." He smiles. Happy to be here. With him. He cuddled up. "Now let's sleep" he mumbled happily. The two gays slowly falling back to sleep. Cuddling close.

Fresh had nothing but good feelings for Christmas day