I think about you and maybe I say a word or two to a friend about these excess feelings for you. I swear, it's not a crush. There's no way in hell that I will allow myself to fall for you. No way, no how. I mean, we did stuff. But it was just friends. Just extra pleasure to go along with our lives. Just friends. We agreed to this oh so many times. I was the one to come up with it. yet, I come around you and my heart seems to pump warmer blood as if it weren't so cold outside. and now, I might be leaving. Just my luck. I screwed up. Now I have no trust, no home, no way to hold back my tears. I feel for you. and when I ask if you have feelings for me, and you ask back, I won't lie. The sad part is that I don't have a boyfriend and you technically don't have a girlfriend. But your're commited to her and her alone. when we did what we did, it felt great. At the time. But after that, I found myself wanting to be more than friends. Why? Don't ask, I won't tell. even if I did know. It's not a crush. It's just left-over feelings that somehow were directed towards you. You're on of my best friends. It's not a crush. I know that for a fact. I can't fall for you. You have a person. No matter what my gut says, logic says otherwise. So again, it's not a crush. it can't be. It won't be. it's just excess feelings is all. Yet, I can't help but wonder whether or not you even care about me. You say you do. it's just ever since our little incident, I forgot how things used to be. So, I have no idea whether or not things did change. we still talk as if nothing happened, that's a good thing. Right? When I said, "I kind of have feelings for you and I kind of don't." you replied with, "Well I do have feelings but I think it's only because we're so young and we kind of went far." You're probably right. It doesn't change the fact that I still feel emotion. It's not a crush. I don't like you. I'm just- just- just- uhhh.... Just attracted to you. No matter how much I feel like wrappingt my arms around your neck to lean in for a kiss. I won't. I learned that it's not worth it the hard way. It's not a crush. It's just feelings. Just feelings. Not a crush. I won't let that happen. NO matter what my gut says. We're just friends, always will be in your eyes. It's not a crush. It can't be.
