Torn Between Distance And Lies

Chapter 1: Getting To Know Me.

Chapter 1: Getting To Know Me.










Why does my life have to be so hard? The saying is it gets better, not worse. So why cant it just be easy? I am only a sophomore in high school trying to fit in with the rest of the teenagers. I have a brother who is attending my school this up-coming school year. I mean my life is not as bad as other teenagers around the world... I have both my parents although I can never see my mom. She is never around with my family so what my dad does "behind the curtains" she doesn't know about.










I am not an alcoholic or do drugs. I have the best grades in school and I have a stable home. I even have a boyfriend who I have been with for three, almost four, years. His name is Sam and he is my world. So why am I so unhappy? Oh yeah, that's right, I am bisextual. And my boyfriend I mentioned? Yeah he lives 662 miles- 10 hours and 50 minutes away.










Now do you understand why my life is hard? Especially mine?










I am in-love with a boy that I have never met in my life. I have only seen him through Face time, Skype, and Snapchat. Only my closes friends know about him. We have had our ups and downs and broken up more then I can remember. Yet every time I lose him, I feel empty and alone. I know a lot of people can relate. I am only fifteen and I know it sounds stupid that I am in love. So many people have told me that I don't know what love is. But the way he treats me is just... so amazing. I am also judged because of my past and what I have done that made Sam and I meet. But if it was not meant to be then why are we still together and stronger then half the couples I know...?










Lesbians, gays and even bisexuals these days still struggle being who they are and finding ways to be happy. I Know I have. I have bisexual for 7 years and everyone but my family knows. So yeah, everyday that I wake up it is a struggle. And every time I go to sleep it is a struggle. Now I am suffering from insomnia, which makes my life more of a struggle with school coming up and everything.
















So for those of you who are wondering what you are reading, this is not another writing piece about one direction or sex. This is neither a narrative nor a diary, but everything that has and is happening to me. It may not be interesting like I have HIV or that I am 15 and Pregnant, but a situation that has affected my life in several ways. There are a lot of people out there that can relate to this I just know it. And just so you know, everything that I am telling you and that you are reading is the truth about me. You can say whatever you want about me its not like I haven't heard it... but keep in mind:










We all make mistakes; it is who forgives you that counts...




XOXO Nina <3