In case you haven't already noticed, I'm a mess.
A complete and utter mess. ok?
I have a troubled past, a troubled life.
Quite frankly, I frequently regret being born.
Do you know how that feels?
It hurts. A lot.
I sit alone in my fucking room at night, shutting everyone out.
Doors locked. lights off. Music on. Window open. Cold breeze. So perfect.
Feels amazing to just separate yourself from the rest of the world... the rest of reality for a while... at least just a little while... even if the lonliness alone hurts me... It still feels good.
I'm a mess, I know.
I over think, I know.
People tell me they're inspired by me, that they 'look up to me', but I really don't understand why.
Why, or better even, how, would anyone find inspiration in someone as messed up as me?
I miss you, sometimes I look up at the pale sky and I feel like joining you...
Because I know you can't come back.
It's too late.
You're daughter turned into a mess. And it's hard to fix.
