Lunatic

001

LUNATIC

He was a lunatic of many colors

He was a brother who held a heart stained with different shades of black

He was a son who loved depending on the day of the week

And at the end of it all he became nothing more than a charcoal soul that eventually lost vision of all colors and all days, all shades and all stains.

He was a lunatic whose trust had been shattered

He never trusted his mother or father with his heart

He never trusted his sister when she told him she loved him

He never trusted his therapist with a word

or his pharmacists with his pills

He never trusted his bankers with a dollar

or his social worker who fought for him when he was 14, 8 years ago from today

The colors painted his eyes blind and the cheated trust and deceitful lies stripped the lunatic of any faith he had left within himself.

He couldn't trust his 3AM shadows anymore

He couldn't trust his 5AM shut door

He couldn't trust himself as he held an unloaded gun

He couldn't trust a filled up bath on a sunday morning

He couldn't trust the memories of being a stepson

He couldn't trust his eyes not open or his voice unheard, quiet and unspoken

His 3AM shadows turned into people

and his 5AM shut door would slam open and shut telling him it was just the wind every time he'd seal it shut

and the unloaded gun would aim at his bloody target marking him dead

and his filled up bath would scrub his filthy memories clean

and his eyes would stay open, his voice always heard, and never unspoken

as he would mumble the alphabet backwards to keep himself sane

and speak his prayers with no vowels to eat away his pain

So in the morning he said hello to his 3AM shadows and fed off of his vowelless prayers after he'd sealed his 5AM shut door for the last time and unloaded the gun which he swore was unloaded and scrubbed his filthy memories clean and his clean memories filthy and kept his bloodshot eyes wide open and his voice always heard, and never unspoken as he mumbled the alphabet backwards still not insane and ate his late night dinner to feed off of his pain and as he head off to bed to tape his eyes wide open he said goodnight to his 3AM shadows only to see them again in the morning.

He was a lunatic of many colors

He was a brother who held a heart stained with different shades of black

He was a son who loved depending on the day of the week

And at the end of it all be became nothing more than a charcoal soul that eventually lost vision of all colors and all days, all shades and all stains.

He was a lunatic, but no lunatic is ever planted a nutty seed.

A seed fed poison instead of water to grow and darkness instead of sunlight to nourish is what makes a nutty seed.