"The appropriate age for marriage is around eighteen for girls and thirty-seven for men." Aristotle.
*** About Women ***
"Women should be obscene and not heard." Groucho Marx
"What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce." Mark Twain
"Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult." Charlotte Whitton.
"I hate housework. You make the beds, you wash the dishes and six months later you have to start all over again." Joan Rivers.
"Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself." Roseanne Barr.
"Last week I stated that this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister and now wish to withdraw that statement." Mark Twain
"A woman is an occasional pleasure but a cigar is always a smoke." Groucho Marx
"Wild horses couldn't drag a secret out of a woman. However, women seldom have lunch with wild horses." Ivern Boyett.
"Women: Can't live with them, can't bury them in the back yard without the neighbours seeing." Sean Williamson.
"If a woman insists on being called Ms, ask her if it stands for miserable." Russell Bell.
"Show me a woman who doesn't feel guilt and I'll show you a man." Erica Jong.
"I only know that people call me a feminist whenever I express sentiments that differentiate me from a doormat or a prostitute." Rebecca West.
"As long as a woman can look ten years younger than her own daughter, she is perfectly satisfied." Oscar Wilde
"When women kiss it always reminds me of prize fighter shaking hands." HL Mencken.
"One of the reasons I don't see eye to eye with Women's Lib is that women have it all on a plate if only they knew it. They don't have to be pretty either." Charlotte Rampling.
"When women go wrong, men go right after them." Mae West.
"She doesn't understand the concept of Roman numerals. She thought we just fought in world war eleven." Joan Rivers.
"She looked as if she'd been poured into her clothes and had forgotten to say when." PG Wodehouse.
"Women are nothing but machines for producing children." Napolean Bonaparte.
"An archaeologist is best husband a woman can have: the older she gets, the more interested he is in her." Agatha Christie.
*** About Men ***
"The male is a domestic animal which, if treated with firmness and kindness, can be trained to do most things." Jilly Cooper.
"You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent? That's why I never take baths." Steven Wright
"Men should be like Kleenex, soft, strong and disposable." Cher.
"A genius is a man who can rewrap a new shirt and not have any pins left over." Dino Levi.
"Give a man a free hand and he'll run it all over you." Mae West.
"The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest." Roseanne Barr.
"When I eventually met Mr Right I had no idea that his first name was Always." Rita Rudner.
"No man is an island, but some of us are pretty long peninsulas." Ashleigh Brilliant.
