3. Bad clichés:
The title says it all. Today, we're dealing with bad clichés. They're a horrible thing and should be cadged, poisoned, and set on fire to feel the burn of a thousand suns. . .that's just how BAD bad clichés are! Enough with the bad puns...
11. Your in love with your best friend? OMG ME TOOOOOO! :
I know this actually happens in real life, I know believe me, I DO... but really? Do you sorry sons of guns have to fock it up so bad? That's right, you little Focker! Joking, anyone ever seen Meet the Fockers or Little Fockers? No? Okay. Anyway, seriously, what is it with this topic on Wattpad? It's everywhere and it's pretty overused, example:
Title: I'M IN LUV WITH MY BEST FRIEND!
Ashley and Banana Joe had become best friends over time. One day while they were sitting outside on a hilltop, the birds chirping and singing gleefully. Banana Joe looked over at Ashley. He was hit with the sudden urge to kiss her. He did. She kissed him back passionately, weeks of frustration poured out into the kiss. Suddenly she stumbled backward. Crap! She thought. I just kissed my best friend! She ran so fast away from him that she fell down hill. When she reached the bottom she smacked into Jack. He looked at her, dazed. "Are you Jill? I broke my crown."
No. Just no. You can't just. . . Just. . . if you just throw it on your readers they will not be happy. If you're going to make your characters fall in love, do it the right and un-cliché way.
12. Bite me hard! :
Vampire stories on wattpad can be so. . . *gags* it kills me how cliché some of them can be, i.e:
After running away from Banana Joe, Ashley found herself in a dark ally. Suddenly she found herself pushed against the brick wall. The the boy's eyes glowed bright yellow as he ran his fangs along the skin of her neck. Ashley, fascinated, buried her fingers in his hair.
Pause!
If I had a vampire in front of me, a real one, not like Edward, I would be running for my life. I would probably die anyway, 'cause I'm black and we always go first.
Play!
He felt this connection to her, he couldn't bring himself to drain her dry. With a burst of inhuman speed he was off into the black night, leaving Ashley to breathe raggedly against the wall.
Nope. I would have called the police after that, but knowing Ashley :
She started on her way home, the smell of him lingering in her nostrils. Apple Jacks and mustard.
LOLWAT Apple Jacks and mustard haha. My point is, most people wouldn't just walk home at ease after meeting a vampire! Unless you're Bella Swan, of course.
13. That furry arse. . . :
I actually like some werewolf stories. . . Just not the ones on wattpad. I read like two and I liked the first one, but the second one not so much i.e:
Jakob walked angrily around the school building. He'd had a horrible day, his mate was a whining little bi--
Pause!
*surfer/high guy* Why are werewolf dudes always so angry? Just chill dude, have a puff of the wind, broske!
Play
He couldn't stand whining chicks. It was even worse after sex, they tried to get him to stay and sh*t. He didn't want to stay, Jakob was too cool for that. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a flash of yellow in the *conveniently* empty hallway. He spun around with superhuman speed and saw a mass or blonde hair. A girl, exactly 10.3 feet away, was attempting to twist her long rope of golden silk into a bun atop her head. She was failing.
He edged closer. She looked nothing like his PMS-y mate. She had beautiful face, even as it was twisted into annoyance at the moment. He accidentally stepped on a lone chip that was lying on the floor. She looked up, but he was already gone on the next hallway, cursing the d*mned chip.
14. Key word being bad BOY! :
Bad boys are usually just that. Bad boys. They preform in the typical jerk manor, but under their exterior, they have a soft, sensitive interior. And of course they have been beaten/abused/abandoned/touched/ignored. Often very similar to the werewolf boy. This is pretty much most wattpad bad boy stories in a nutshell :
Peter was pissed off. He'd just seen Jakob scamper off. But that wasn't what ticked him. It was the fact that he'd been watching Ashley.
It was creepy and it reminded him a little to much of the days when he had to sell drugs for his dad, his horrible dad who suffered from a chronic case oh A**holia.
Pretty much. That's just a little blurb, but there it is. His daddy made him sell drugs and God knows whatever. I like bad boy stories. . . sometimes. When it's not unrealistic and cliché like ↑.
15. What do you mean you don't know what you like? :
When characters are unstructured it's pointless. Characters are either dynamic, meaning they change from beginning to end (usually MC's), or static, meaning they don't change at all (usually sub-characters). All characters should have something they like to do or a hobby or pet peeve, something! I read a story where all the girl did was shop and go on dates for 30-something chapters. Example:
Ashley couldn't tell you whether or not she liked PB & J or if she liked mustard. She was a pretty indecisive girl. But one thing she did know was that she luuuuved shopping.
Just. . . stop.
correct:
Ashley couldn't stand spelling errors, creepy boys, squirrels, or shopping.
That is all.
<--WATCH OUT FOR DEM ARROWS-->
peace out targets, I don't know when I'll be updating again, but it'll be after IAV is done. I have four or five chapters left.
YOU ARE READING
Things I Hate On Wattpad
RandomJust my thoughts on wonderful Wattpadia, what drives me nuts on here and everything else. People say this is funny, maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Maybe you should read it.
