Come to Big Brother

“Come here, child… Come to big brother. I shall protect you.”

The words used to bring me such comfort… Such a shame they were a lie…

I was chained to a wall… My clothes torn, ratted, showing holes in unseemly places… Only if mother could see me now... See what big brother has done and what he has become. Hunger gnaws at my stomach… Begging for food that will never come. I refuse to eat what he provides… No longer will I be controlled or drugged by the man I once trusted and worshipped. The man that was my brother…

He enters the room. Handsome… Yes that is what most people would call him but I see the truth… Under the handsome facade seethes a monster… A dark twisted beast that thrives on making miserable trust and loving bonds. The room spun….

            “Child… You have not been eating…” He said with fake concern coming ever closer. I make no effort to respond… There is no point; I would just be talking to the monster that has possessed my brother. He cresses my face, examining me for signs of breaking, of being worn down, I hope I have shown him none. Feeling daring, I spit at his face, it hits. Dropping the hand that was touching me he wipes it off glaring. “That was not nice, little one… Mother raised you better than that.” Again I make no sound, staring at the monster with a hatred I did not know I could possess. The monster smiles at me. “Don’t you wish to come down? I can let you down… You can come back to me, little one. Be civil and behave.” He waits when I don’t respond he sweetens his tone. “I did not mean to hurt you, little one. You are my world. I merely was trying to protect you.” He then said in an offhand manner. “People can be so cruel to what they don’t understand…but not I…I know you’re special.” He smiled at me again.

            I felt sick. Quietly I whispered with what little energy I had. “Go rot in hell…”

            He tsked. “Such language…” He walked over to the wall where he kept his toys. Chains and whips, floggers and knives, poisons and their antidotes all lined the walls out of my sight. I remember watching him use them on other. Telling me it was the price for those who disobey and hurt what is his. What he didn’t tell me was that he also used them on what is he claims as his. I heard rummaging as he chose something special for me.

            He came back with a heavy leather whip smiling kindly at me. “Do you know what this is?” He asked softly. I looked at it and back at him hoping to diminish the fear in my eyes and the hope he wouldn’t do it again. Judging by his widening sympathetic smile, I was unsuccessful. “This is a special whip called a scourge. I don’t wish to use it, little one…” He warned.

            Eyes wide I shook my head slowly. “Please…” I choked out. Surely he wouldn’t…

            He smiled sadly. “But how else will you learn?” He walked behind me and I braced myself for the first stinging lash. The minutes ticked by and I was… disappointed. The lashes had not come. I couldn’t even hear if he was behind me or not though I dared not turn around to look. Slowly I allowed myself to relax… The moment I did, however, a lash cut across my back causing me to cry out. How long the beating continued, I do not know… I eventually passed out from the pain feeling my blood run down my back like water droplets.

            I awoke when my knees hit the floor and my brother picked me up. “Don’t worry…” He crooned.  “Big brother is here… I shall protect you.” As I closed my eyes again I swore I saw him give me his old smile…