Boys Like You

Chapter 11

Harry's Pov

Anger was something I was used to. Anger was second nature to me. I had always been angry, always. My anger often consumed me and made me do unspeakable things, but in this moment my anger had reached new heights. My fists clenched, my fingernails digging into the palms of my hands, almost to the point of blood. I could feel my breathing deepen as my eyes turned black with uncontrollable rage. I looked up, Clyde now shifting uncomfortably as my eyes locked on his. I tilted my head to the side and took a step forward, confused when he stood his ground - this was rare.

"I. Warned. You." I could hear venom drip in my tone.

"Hear me out." He demands, unfazed.

"Why the fuck should I?" I snap, my voice echoing through the air.

"Harry, calm down mate." Zayn begs, placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Get the fuck off me." I hiss, pulling from his grip.

"I'm trying to make you see sense Harry." Clyde insists, taking a brave step forward.

"What's so wrong with me liking someone, huh?" I croak; hurt laced in my tone.

"Don't you get it yet?" he questions, sighing heavily as regret fills his eyes.

"Wha-

"The closer you get to her, the more power you give them. You think Charlie won't find out? You're the one who used to work for him. You know how he works. He gets revenge by going after the people his betrayers care most about. HE'S ALREADY THREATENED HER LIFE HARRY. You get any closer to her... you may as well sign her death sentence." His words hit like knifes - he's right.

I choked, tears prickling at my eyes. I've been an idiot. I've been careless. I should have known better than to let my guard down. I should have known better than to peruse her. I should have known, but when I'm around her I can't see anything else. I look around the room, no one able to look me in the eyes and I know that they all agree with him. I guess I do too.

"You may all like her and you may think she's nice, but at the end of the day you're only making it worse for her. Is that what you want Harry? Do you want him to kill her because you were to stupid to stay away from her? He'll kill her and you know he will. You're just adding fuel to the fire." He looks at me with a sympathetic look.

My eyes meet Zayn's and I await his input. If I trust anyone in this room, it's him. He shakes his head and his gaze falls to the floor. Running his fingers through his quiff, he sighs, heavily.

"He's got a point." He mumbles.

"I know it will be hard to stay away." He adds, once again meeting my strained gaze.

"But wouldn't it be harder standing at her funeral?"

"You've made your point." I whisper, holding back my icy tears.

"I never get to be happy." I spit, forcing my way past Clyde, nudging him as I do.

I ran up the stairs and into my room, slamming the door behind me. I couldn't believe how quickly everything had changed. Today I woke up the happiest I've ever been. I woke up to her, and now? Well now I have to push her away. I have to push away the one person I could actually see myself opening up to. But, if I don't, she'll die. I'm used to death. I grew up watching people die around me in the most violent ways, and sometimes I was even the one pulling the trigger. Death was something that never bothered me, most of the time I wouldn't even flinch. But if she died, I don't know what I would do... I'd be devastated. It would kill me, and it would be my fault.