Suicide

Suicide

I was standing on a bridge near a shallow creek. I wanted it to be fast, and efficient. This was the best way I could think of right now. My parents recently divorced and were at two different ends of the spectrum when it came to decisions. My boyfriend cheated on me twice, with two different girls. He told me the news the other night, at our senior prom. When he told me, I wasn’t the only one to hear. So I ran away. I didn’t know where to go, so I just spent the night in the forest. I kept on wishing and hoping that someone would rescue me. That someone would notice my pain. When I figured no one would come to save me, I came up with this solution.

My best friend was murdered two months ago. It should have been me those two months ago, I was with her, and I was the one who should have been in the alley alone, instead of going to the bathroom. I should never have left her alone, and it is my entire fault. I promised myself I wouldn’t cry when I did it, that I had wasted my tears enough on a hopeless cause. That in my last moments on Earth, I could at least say I was brave enough to not cry. As I thought of all the other faults and saddened memories of my life, I did feel my eyes prick. They begged me to let my eyes flood, but I just couldn’t let that happen, for my dignity.

I gripped my hands on the thin railing and pulled myself up. It was a thin and old railing, ready to give in at any chance. But I wouldn’t be on there long. I struggled to keep my balance on the railing, so when I finally did, I looked ahead of me. The creek was beautiful, and it was almost comforting to know I was going to die in such a comforting place. Almost.

My mind wandered a bit, making me wonder if I should really do this. But before I could second guess myself I stretched on my tippy-toes, ready to jump.

“What are you doing??!” My head swiveled around so fast that I lost my balance. At this last minute I realized how much I was not ready to die.

“HELP!” I screamed wobbling around on the railing, knowing I would only stay on for a little bit longer. Strong arms wrapped around me just as I was about to fall. I got a glimpse of the mop of brown hair before I fell into his arms. The force of my fall had us tumbling back onto the bridge, on our butts. I didn’t look at him, I couldn’t, so I just buried myself into his neck murmuring lost words. He kept his arms wrapped around me as we hugged on the bridge.

When I finally got the courage to look into his eyes I gasped and so did he.

“Alison?!” He worriedly whispered the same time I murmured his name.

“Danny…I am so sorry! I don’t know what I was thinking! I just…I couldn’t handle it anymore…and…and….” My words were lost when I started bawling. My tears quickly soaked up my shirt as he hugged me tighter and whispered comforting words in my ear. His words made me shiver with delight.

I had known Danny for awhile now, you see, he is my (now ex) boyfriend’s brother. The boyfriend who recently cheated on me. Danny was always sweeter and shyer than his brother, Nick. I just let myself melt into his arms, and my breathing and crying eventually slowed down to an occasional sob or ragged intake of breath.

“Alison…” he whispered in my ear, “what were you doing on that railing?” He sounded worried and scared that his guess would be right.

“I told you, Danny…I just couldn’t take it anymore.” I told him quietly.

“Take what?” He asked me, tucking some hair behind my ear and stroking the rest of it softly. I didn’t know how to explain it correctly so I just said one word.

“Life.” He hugged me tighter, thinking if he let go I might disappear forever. I gripped onto his shirt tighter, thinking I just might do that.

“Alison…you gotta know….” He stopped and I looked up into his deep brown eyes. The same ones I had been looking at for a few years now.

“What…?”

“You gotta know that I love you, you know that, right?” Butterflies went through my stomach by the hundreds, even though I knew what he meant, a tiny bit of my hoped.

“I know, Danny. I love you, too. Sisters and Brothers forever, right?” He looked into my eyes and I couldn’t read anything in them. No emotion seemed to be filling his eyes except…no it can’t be.

“Alison…I love you more than that. I always have.” Before my shocked thoughts could turn into words he leans over the few centimeters and kisses me full on the lips.

Ever since then, I have never doubted myself, never felt unloved, because I always knew Danny was going to be there for me, through thick and thin.

And he was.

THE END (: