The Adventures of Margot in Libertine Land (ENG)

Ch. 1 - The Train Wreck

"Well... at least it's Friday, already." Margot thought to herself as she waited for the last subway of the day to go home. It had been a long and stressful week at college, and she was tired...

Margot was a classical piano student, already in her twenties, and although she loved her instrument, it was currently serving her more as a source of personal frustration than professional fulfillment. The problem was that Margot had been having performance issues on the piano due to muscle tensions that were becoming increasingly severe - for reasons she didn't quite understand - which ended up causing problems in various areas of her life - especially in academia - thus fueling her frustrations. She even sought out a physiotherapist, with whom she had been having sessions for months; and although there were indeed some improvements, it still wasn't enough for her, not achieving the desired success to tackle the complexity of the pieces she played. The physiotherapist even suggested that maybe the problem was more psychological than physical, and advised Margot to see a psychoanalyst.

"But with what money?" Margot lamented, disheartened. The physio sessions were already expensive enough. Therapy too? That was out of the question for a broken student like her.

"Sometimes I think I should have chosen a better-paying profession, and only then, when well settled, considered making a living from music. Better off rich in a horrible profession than poor with tendinitis... no, what am I saying? Deep down, I know I chose the piano not out of stupidity, but because I know it's impossible for me to live doing anything else."

She found herself in this state of mind, somewhat lost in thought on that almost empty train line, when the train finally arrived, causing her to set aside those questions, for now. It was a daily routine, a result of her night classes, which, combined with the fact that she also lived extremely far from the city, meant she had to stay there until the end of her activities - whether studies or work - which didn't allow her to go home until the late hours of the night, catching the last subway of the day. All of this, of course, was very tiring and stressful for her.

"Maybe that's the problem," she began again, to herself, as she made her way between the cars, "this accumulated stress that doesn't find release, that might be causing all this tension in my muscles. It would be good if I didn't have to commute so much, or stay all day in the city without a break at home. But what to do... an apartment in the city is too expensive. It would also be practically impossible for me to transport my piano here, let alone to an apartment, considering that I could only practice, in fact, during the night. I'm sure the neighbors wouldn't allow it... oh, why does everything seem to conspire against me, Lord! Everything would be so much easier if I had just a little more money...".

She settled into an empty seat, which wasn't hard to find given the late hour, and as she reflected on these issues with herself, her eyes fell on a mother and daughter sitting nearby. The mother was reading "Alice in Wonderland" to the little girl, who was almost falling asleep against her. Margot quite liked the Alice books - the first book she ever liked. It's a shame that, when she read it, her mother forbade her from doing so again after Margot started losing respect for authoritative figures, just like Alice. Her mother, in fact, forbade her from doing many things in life. Deprived her of so many experiences... This quickly led her to remember her complicated relationship with her mother, which did nothing to help her state of mind.

Almost as a defense mechanism against these thoughts that plagued her, Margot began to ponder the tasks of the coming week, as was her custom. Because it was no coincidence that Margot was an extremely busy woman, you know. Most of the time, she overloaded herself on purpose, so that her distractions wouldn't have idle time to wander through those places in her mind that she didn't want to access.