Paper Rings

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"And if love be madness may I never find sanity again"
-john Mark Green.

There is so much sanity in the eyes of sinners. I thought this as I sat silently listaning to the dall drone of the preachers vocie, boredom wasn't something I was very comfortable with and the preacher's crazy eyes werent a sight I hadn't seen before. Why I had decided to go into a church again was beyond me, self-sabotage someone had told me once but they were long gone now so wait did it matter?
I stood up annoyance swelling in my chest and walked out of the church leaving the stuck-up pricks behind me to gasp in shock at my audacity.
I walked down the dime mostly empty streets the crunch of fall leaves under my feet. people past moving from place to place without noticing the world around them which I was fine with, being alone was soothing I was totally fine with in fact I preferred it on most days. I didn't understand people and they didn't understand me I realized this a long time ago. I passed Walgreens and a miky'ds I passed rows of beautiful houses set into cobblestone streets flower gardens spilling and pushing through iron fences and cracks in houses. I passed a bookstore before turning the corner onto my street, if you had told me a year ago that this is where I would be living now I would never have believed you in fact I probably would have laughed in your face calling you crazy but now, now I walked up brick steps unlocking a heavy black door with a gold handle and knocker in the shape of a rose. The thick smell of fresh bread hung in the air and I termed the corner into the large bright kitchen. "Jasaline," I said "we've talked about this when it's just me here there's no need to cook, I don't eat you know that." she turned towards me saying nothing just smiling like I was a small child she was delighting in. A deep flowing male voice come from the dining room door way saying " your going to eat, because I'm here and you know the rules" I termed sharply to face the tall handsome man who I had grown to resent leaning like he owned the place agents the door frame smerking at me.

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