Blue Haired Alien Girlfriend

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Blue Haired Alien Girlfriend

John H. Carroll

Published by John H. Carroll at Wattpad 

Copyright 2009 John H. Carroll

Cover image Copyright 2010 John H. Carroll

This story is dedicated to my wife who accuses me of having a blue haired alien girlfriend.

***

Lisa was staring with glassy eyes at the last of three tapes for orientation, her chin propped in hands with elbows on knees.  She popped the hundredth bubble of a heavily chewed piece of gum.

“And that is how you make the perfect blue-cheese bass burger here at Fish Burgers,” the dork in the TV said as he waved about a perfectly made fish-burger with obvious and embarrassing pride.  Lisa pushed the eject button on the VCR, amazed that anyone still used such an archaic device.

Standing up, she brushed off her brown and teal uniform while looking at herself in the break-room mirror.  Her hair shoved under a hat puked up by the seventies.  The thing Lisa liked most about herself was her green eyes, which seemed brighter than most people’s.  The rest of the effect was something she had every intention of ignoring.  She left the break-room and walked down the short hall to the manager’s office.  “Here you go,” she said, handing the tape back.

Second-Assistant Manager Joshua Collin didn’t seem like most fast food managers in Lisa’s opinion.  He gave her an absentminded sort of smile as he said, “I hope you survived with your sanity intact.”  The smile made Lisa’s knees go a little weak.  It wasn’t that he was extremely handsome, but he had really nice eyes and a quiet demeanor.

“It was pretty bad, but I survived,” she replied with a nervous giggle, hoping he didn’t think her too much of a fool.  She took a deep breath, straightened her hat and asked, “So what do I do now, Sir?”

Joshua frowned, his dark eyebrows lowering.  “Please don’t call me sir,” he said, running a hand through his curly black hair.  “I’ll show you how to work the boards and make some burgers.  They won’t look perfect like the ones in the video, but I think they use plastic for those,” he told her with a wink.

“Boards?” Lisa asked in confusion.

Joshua shrugged and explained, “That’s what they call the area where we put burgers together.  I don’t know why.”  Lisa stared at Joshua as he led her into the kitchen, thinking he must be about six feet tall and in his early twenties. He continued with the explanation, “I think maybe it comes from the saying ‘room and board’ like they used to say at inns in the old days or something.”  Lisa gently bit her lip as she studied his nibbleable ears . . . was that even a word?  He considered some more then agreed with his own conclusion.  “Yeah, boards have to do with food or something.”

For the next hour, Joshua showed Lisa how to make fish burgers.  She enjoyed being close to him.  He smelled like broiler smoke, but in a nice way.  After the hour was done, he gave her lunch, which was free for all employees.  Lunch was supposed to be made by someone else, but he let her make her own as he went to work with one of the cashiers.

Caitlyn, the drive through cashier, had an attitude and really knew what she was doing.  The girl had been there for an entire three and a half months.  She jerked her head signaling Lisa to sit with her.  Caitlyn’s blonde hair was tied back in a pony tail and her hat was tilted to the side.  Employees weren’t supposed to wear nose rings at Fish Burgers, but when Joshua was the manager they could get away with it.  Caitlyn’s nose ring was in the shape of a skull and she wore matching skull earrings, bandana and charm bracelet.  She must be really into skulls or something, Lisa thought.

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