A Fathers Love

The Whole Story

"Let down, falling to the ground. I felt alone all these years. Wondering when he would come back to me. I want to meet him. I want to know if he has eyes as dark as the night sky, or if he ever cries. I want to know why he never stuck around long enough to say goodbye. He's never once replied to my calls, but instead pretends he doesn't hear me through these thin walls."

My father, I've never met him but I'd love to. My mom swears he's a terrible man and has no desire for a family. I trust my mother but as a seventeen year old I want to know the truth for myself. Hear both sides of the story. Ever since summer break started a week ago, everyday I wake up in a comfy, pristine, brisk room. It's my comfort place. I know nothing can harm me here. Whenever I feel anxious I know I can run to my safe place and lay on the fluffy white pillows that lay neatly across my queen bed and watch my favorite movie since I was delivered, Gremlins. My mother is an aspiring baker and always makes me cinnamon rolls in the morning. I'm a hundred percent burnt out on them but refuse to tell her this. My mother is my best friend after all we've been through no matter what she makes sure I'm her first priority, and I appreciate that. I've never felt unwanted in her presence. She really is a great baker but not so much cook. That's why if you were to look in our trash can, tons of Chinese take out boxes could be spotted.

"What are you doing Roslyn?"

"I'm looking for Spikes food, I can't find it anywhere."

"When are you gonna give that old hamster away, he's outlived his breed's lifespan."

"Mom, how could I? He's a huge part of my daily routine."

"All you do is watch tv, eat, and talk to Jackson."

"In between all that I feed Spike too."

"Today I want to break your cycle, we are going to take a short joy ride to my job"

"Okay I'll be ready in a few."

"Roslyn, I want you to eat first," my mom says with a wide grin. "I made cinnamon rolls!"

I'm never excited to go to my moms workplace. It's always way too hot and the smell of her coworker, Jessica's perfume is overbearing, always leaving the customers with a headache, appreciating the Earth's clean air. 

"Do you want to sit in the car?"

"Sure mom. How long do you think you're gonna be?"

"Not too long, just chill out in the car for a minute, play any song you want."

I watch my mom get out of the car and I suddenly get a sad feeling. She's gone, I think to myself. I hate to see my mom leave not knowing what she's doing at all times kills me. I feel very protective of my mother, she's all I got. I can see her through the shop window as she starts hanging clothes on the racks in a smallest to largest order. Her long dirty brown hair gets in the way of her vision every time she bends down to get a hanger for the next shirt. I shift my attention to the entrance of the store as I hear the bell at the top of the door ring. A tall, muscled, well groomed man walks in the store. I look back at the window where my mom is still focused on organizing the clothing racks. The man walks up to her and taps her shoulder. I can tell she is shocked by the way she stood there with her mouth and eyes wide open. Like a cat the hair on my arms became erect. I knew something was wrong. I got out of the car and proceeded towards the shop's door. As I'm walking in, the tall man from before is walking out. We lock eyes for a short bit and he gives me a nod. I nod back as I've been taught by my mother it's the polite thing to do.

"Go back to the car Roslyn, I'm just finishing up here."

"Who was that?"

"Who?"my mom asked with a dumb founded look pretending she didn't know who I was talking about.