All We Know Is Falling (Watty Awards 2011)

  It was my first day of the new counseling group that my mom has signed me up for. I'm so nervous, mostly because i'm horrible at expressing how I feel. Especially in front of others. I found this out when in english class, we had to write a poem describing how we felt. When I got up in front of the class to read my poem, I read a blank sheet.  

  Mom said that this counseling group was supposed to be good for me. But that's what she said about the last one, and we all know how that worked out: terrible. She said that I should feel more confident about this one and have faith in the people that want to support me and help me rise above my monster. In fact, that's what this group was called. "Rise Above." At least the name gave me hope. Some hope. Hope that I didn't even knew existed.

  My mom dropped me off in her blue Subaru and watched me like a hawk as I entered the building. On the outside, it looked like a nice doctor's office. On the inside, it was a madhouse. As soon as I walked through the doors, three little blonde girls ran in front of me and dissapeared into the room across the narrow hall. They have counseling for kids too? I thought. Well, kids have problems too, I guess.

  There was a small reception desk on the right and I walked up to it. There was a young woman behind the counter with long blonde hair and blue eyes hidden behind black glasses. She tapped her pen against a clipboard. "How can I help you?" she asked.

  "I'm Alexandria Hale, i'm here for a - -," I start, but the womans already got me penciled in.

  "Down the hall, take a left, and it's the first double-doors on the right," she said proudly, like memorizing the rooms was all part of her paycheck.

  "Must be an intern," I mumble, low enough to wear she can't hear.

  I follow her directions and sure enough, there's the double doors, looming like pillars in front of me. Or maybe i'm just nervous. Yeah, that's it. I take a deep breath and open the doors. The first thing I see is a circle of chairs placed around a single chair. They were all red and I thanked the heavens that they weren't blue. I hate blue chairs. It looked like I was early and I got there before everyone else which was a relief.

  I decided to take a walk around the room. I noticed small posters covering the wall saying things like, "Believe that life is worth living and your belief will help create the fact," and, "He who has a why to live can bear almost any how."

  Just then, a man came out from a door on the left wall that I didn't notice before. He had shaggy brown hair and green eyes, covered with almost the same black glasses that the receptionist woman wore.

  "Oh, hello," the man said. "You're early," he flipped through a notebook that he had been holding in his hands and his finger finally landed on a page. "Your name?"

  "Alexandria Hale," I replied. He scanned the page and finally found my name, putting a small check next to it.

  "Well, Miss Hale, take a seat and the others should be arriving soon." He gave me a tight smile and walked out the room. Great first meeting, I thought. No introduction, nothing.

  I picked one of the red twelve red chairs to sit in and waited. About several minutes later, a blonde girl with sparkling green eyes walked in, carrying a small zebra print backpack. She kind of striked me as familiar, but I couldn't remember where I saw her. She took a seat next to me and smiled.     

 "Hey, i'm Helena."

 "I'm Alexandria."

  "That's a pretty name. Dad or mom send you here?" I tensed up when she said "dad" but didn't react much. I try not to let it bother me. But we see how that's working out.