Juan for Juan

Prologue - Juan for Juan

Prologue

I blinked a few times as the light pierced through the thin curtains, my legs wobbling at the warmth brought by such a delectable morning. The winter had been long, although I enjoyed being inside and warm while the weather outside was ferocious; it had been such a very long time since I had been able to be outdoors, and not shiver. Understandably, a sight of the sun had immediately brought a smile to my lips.

As I basked in the sun; trying to absorb its energy as if I were a snake. My mind began to wander back to the last few months, and more dauntingly, the next few. In a dozen or so weeks I would leave school and be thrust into college life.

Where the demands, and importance of success would necessitate a change in tact from my current ‘go with the flow’ lifestyle. I had never really been one to put pressure on myself, but I knew the late nights, drinking and Juan Felipe would have to stop, or the consequences may be becoming another example of the teenagers who waste their potential; who had it all, lost it all and then even more.

In fact, I was on course to coast through school being slightly above average. I was set to score a few A’s, backed up with a collection of C’s and in science maybe some D’s. The problem wasn’t the difficulty. No, just who wants to revise and do homework when the football’s on, or Juan’s clothes aren’t? I should explain. Juan was my girlfriend of a few months, and I couldn’t have imagined anyone more perfect. Everything was fantastic.

If only I had realised it wouldn’t stay that way, and the pain that was to come would make all my feelings insignificant and change me to the core. It’s interesting, how the things we care about the most almost always end up being the things that destroy us.

Anyhow, I had always thought people who could go home and spend hours with their nose in a book might as well be chickens in my opinion. Steal their eggs and wring their necks! ... Well, maybe a little harsh but I have always felt with school that as long as you understand the basics, you can make up the rest and get away with it. As I had realised on my visit to college, this wasn’t going to be possible anymore.

“Bruce, get up it’s almost lunch! I’m now going shopping, why don’t you go and clean your fish” My mum and her crazy ideas had rudely forced me to open my eyes.

“That is a fantastic idea! But I’m actually quite busy at the moment, good day” I failed to hide my sarcasm more and more as I spoke before eventually sinking back into my fluffy pillow.

While my mind pondered the fear of the unknown and the journeys I had been through in the last few years, I felt a strange sense of calm encapsulate my body. The past and the future were not touching me here. I was safe, no threats or worries. My mind soon floated away with this new found calm as I fell once again into a deep sleep.

***************************************************************************************************************

I pulled back on the cold paint flaked handle and the water slammed off. With my eyes still clenched shut, I reached out with my hand, searching blindly for the green towel which I’d grabbed on my weary walk to the shower. As I finally grasped it a large clunk resonated its way around the black stained shower floor. Instantly I remembered that my phone was within the bundled towel and immediately I dropped to my knees clumsily seizing it from the wet, shower floor. I cursed when it didn’t respond and the screen filled with water. Even worse, it was showing that I had one new message, all I could see was “Cassidy – Hey babes, Thanks for last...”.  Turning it off, I placed it on the window sill in a desperate bid that the sun would dry it out.

My phone was essentially my life. I had texts, images, even videos of cats dancing on there, which I had accumulated from years of use, I had always found it hard to delete anything. Something as simple as a message I would probably never look at again I still couldn’t bear to be without.

As I wandered back to my room, the corner of my eye caught the time, 10:25. Almost instantly a burst of energy and fear hit me. Juan was coming round for a day of movies, kissing, at 10:30 and I hadn’t yet even found my pants. I frantically rushed to find anything I could; eventually managing to grab a pair of blue jeans and a white vest top just in time to hear the door thud.As I opened the door and saw my Juan standing there, the light appeared to dance upon her angelic features. I soon became lost in her effortless perfection and was only awoken when she barged past and chuckled at me, still staring blankly out of the open door. Juan and I had been together a few months now, yet butterflies still bubbled in my stomach at the mere sound of her name. She was definitely the Juan for me.