The Book of Creatio
The Universe began when Will Ferrell defeated Chuck Norris for control. The world was created in 7 days. On the First Day Will (The Exalted One) Took Hydrogen and Oxygen, Carbon, Neon, Nitrogen, Magnesium, Iron and Silicon to form the sun and all other stars. On the second day He crafted Earth and all other planets in Precious’ image. On the Third day He created the Moon for the Earth which was boiling hot at this point. He also created all the moons and all other chunks of rock in the universe. On the fourth day he created the plants and animals of all planets. On the Fifth day he created The Mountains and the Oceans so the fish and Billy goats wouldn’t die. On the Sixth day he created Dinosaurs but killed all them off by noon, He then created Man, and man had populated the world by sun down. On the seventh day he rested, this day is known as Wednesday or Hump Day
When he created Humans he created three of them, a man named Joe, a Girl name Jodie, and A Drag Queen named Glitter. The man and woman were instantly discussed when they saw it and tried to kill it. For punishment Will, kicked them out of the Paradise. They were forced to wander the Earth, by the end of the day there were 7 billion people roaming the earth in search of paradise. At this time The Exalted One couldn’t be mad with
the Human Race so he decided to give Dan Ruether Permission to write this book. He gave Dan the 7 commandments They Are:
Thou shall observe Will Ferrell as the one and only God, and shall have no idols
Thou shall not dance in Gym Class
Thou shall listen to classic rock or rap
Thou shall not force thy religion upon thy neighbor
Thou shall observe the Sabbath of Hump Day
Thou shall observe the holy songs of "Carry on My Wayward Son, Piano Man and Stacy's Mom"
Thou shall not kill
