I Don't Deserve Your Forgiveness ~A Countryhuman Story~

Self Harm

WARNING:
In this chapter you get to experience the end of Spain x Phil, abuse, and a little bit of self harm... If you can handle all of these things you may continue reading, thank you. -Author

~333 years later~

No one's pov:

After over three centuries of colonization you may have thought that the two main countries have lived well and lived happily ever after...

You're wrong...

This is no fairytale...

The story is far more deep than you think...

Philia's pov:

It has been over 333 years of me being with Spain and everything was great when we confessed to each other, it was probably one of the most breathtaking things I ever experienced, I was finally happy again.

Spain and I lived happily together for about a century.... But then everything..... Changed...

The change has started of small but as time passed it grew worse. It started from other countries trying to take away my land, then it grew when he had a lot of work now that he had to raise two different lands that are so far away from each other, and finally he snapped when one of his colonies won the war for their independence... When all of this happened I tried to calm him down by talking to him but he then started shouting at me saying that it was all my fault... Saying that if he hadn't found my stupid land none of this would've happened.... If he didn't find ME none of this would've happened...
And now he goes out every night drinking, and when he does come home he always brings a new woman with him... And now instead of letting me sleep beside him, he transfered me to my old room... And every time late at night I've suffered while hearing my ex-lover give out groans to different women while I just cry silently while doing nothing but handle new cuts on my arm that I planted there despite my broken heart and depression.

I heard the front door of the mansion open and as expected Spain walked in with a woman in his arms while holding a drink. I quickly wrapped the bandage around my arm to hide the fresh cuts I gave myself. "Babe, who is she?" the woman asked in a disgusted tone. "Oh not to worry, *hic* she's just a scullery maid." Spain said while giving me an evil smirk on his face. I ignored them both and headed for the stairs when suddenly I felt a hand grip on my arm tightly. Sh** my cuts, I thought to myself while wincing in pain. "Hey, babe, *hic* wanna beat her up, *hic* with me?" Spain said evilly. "Oh it would be a pleasure!" the woman said following Spain as he dragged me to the dungeon. No... Not here, not again... This just happened to me last night.

As Spain came to a halt he forced me to kneel and handcuffed me to the wall, my back facing them. Spain then ripped my dress revealing my back and gripped on my face. "Smile." He commanded. How can I when I'm in this situation, actually how can I when I've been depressed, heart broken, and emotionless for over 2 centuries. "SMILE!!!" Spain yelled at the top of his lungs. I just kept a straight face and looked at him with emotionless eyes. "How can I?" I blandly whispered. This angered Spain so much as he turned and just grabbed the whip from the wall. He started whipping my back nonstop but I didn't shed even a single tear due to me being used to this. I felt the whip stop as I could also feel the fresh blood trickling down my back. "Babe this is boring, she didn't even wince once." the girl complained while sitting on a chair nearby. "Oh she will." Spain said grimly.

He grabbed the chains making me tumble forward. "I see you've grown immune to the torture I give you now... So I guess I'll have to step it up a notch..." he then grabbed my face and pressed a cold sharp blade against my right eye and made a scar that trailed from my eyebrow, to the middle of my cheek. I winced a little and Spain frowned. "Impressive, but I wanted to hear a scream from you..." A long silence was heard, but then suddenly his left hand touched my right eye, the one with the fresh scar. After touching it for about a minute his hand forced itself into my eye socket and ripped my eye out.