What The Hell Is Wrong With This Family? (BNHA Chatfic)

13

Today 2:19 AM

Keigo: So I was thinking

Touya: What the actual fuck??

Keigo: What???

Touya: IT'S 2 IN THE FUCKING MORNING

Keigo: And??

Touya: AND I'M TRYING TO SLEEP

Keigo: But—

Touya: Keigo, I love you, but go the fuck to sleep

Keigo: But I wanted a midnight snack 🥺

Touya: UGHHHH FINE

Touya: Get your midnight snack then, but you better go back to sleep after

Keigo: Okay :D

Today 3:30 AM

Keigo: Where are the marshmallows??

Touya: You didn't go back to sleep

Keigo: But I CAN'T FORGET THE MARSHMALLOWS

Touya: Fucking get back to bed

Keigo: But—

Touya: Butts are for shitting

Keigo: Isn't it supposed to be sitting..?

Touya: What idiot said that?

Touya: You know what, never mind JUST SLEEP

Keigo: Fine ;-;

Today 4:01 AM

Keigo: Wait I just realized, I never got to say what I wanted to say

Shouto: OH MY GOD GO THE FUCK TO SLEEP

Touya: GO THE F— wait a minute

Touya: ...

Touya: Shouto~

Touya: What are you doing up~?

Shouto: What do you mean what am I doing up?  You're up too

Touya: But you get tired easily, so that's making me question why you're here at 4 AM

Shouto: How the hell would you know that?

Touya:

Touya:

Shouto: Stop being a fucking stalker

Touya: You have no idea how many photos I have of you :)

Shouto: I couldn't begin to imagine 🙄

Touya: But enough of that

Touya: Why are you here, Sho-Sho~?

Shouto: The notifications were getting annoying

Shouto: And now it's even worse because now I actually have to talk to you

Touya: dramatic gasp

Touya: Rude

Touya: Nono but seriously I must know the tea

Shouto: Why can't you make your own tea?

Touya: breathes

Touya: Why are you like this?

Shouto: Like what?

Touya: You know what never mind

Touya: But seriously, 4 AM?  Really?

Shouto: Yeah.  And?

Touya: You should be in bed young man

Touya: Not fucking your boyfriend tsk tsk tsk

Shouto: I—

Shouto: ...

Shouto: Um...

Touya: Oh~?  What's this~?

Shouto: What's what?

Touya: Little Shouto doesn't have a smartass comeback??  What's the occasion~?

Shouto: Nothing

Touya: You're up to something, I can SMELL IT

Shouto: Go away

Touya: JUST ADMIT WHAT YOU'RE DOING

Touya: Or who

Shouto: ...

Shouto: Never

Touya: Then be prepared to be annoyed for the rest of your life :)

Shouto: You're an asshole

Touya: And you're in an asshole

Shouto: ...

Shouto: I...

Shouto: ...

Shouto: STOP

Touya: Yeah yeah, I'll stop

Touya: For now

Shouto: Thank you

Shouto: Now if you'll excuse me, I got stuff to do

Touya: Hmmm I really wanna ask who's stuff but I said I'll stop

Touya: Besides, I'm very fucking tired and I want to go back to sleep

Keigo: Hey do we have any more Yakitori??

Touya: OMFG—

Today 5:30 AM

Natsuo: Dammit, I missed all the drama again 👌😔

Natsuo: Let me just leave this here

Natsuo: