Greetings, Earthlings. I am here on official alien business. And by business I mean shenanigans. Take me to your leader and whatnot. Actually don't, because I have anxiety and I'd probably spill my coffee all over them and that would create the first Space War. I'd rather not add that into my biography. 

Anyway, these shenanigans include encrypted writings from light years away. So, like, meaning that you'll only think they're good if you're, like, from my home planet and stuff. So don't be vexed when you look at these translated-to-the-English-language compositions, and wonder 'what the absolute fuck is this garbage??' It's okay, human. I, too, wonder those things and I WROTE them.

If you're here on official alien business too, then hey, pal! Long time, no see! Let's talk about the world domination stuff later, you know, when there aren't so many Earthling ears around.

If you have any questions, well, good luck, because I still have that anxiety and yeah, I'd probably spill coffee all over you, too. But as you can see, I've linked my other human-media down below! There, you can go tumbling down hills and stuff.

I think, anyway, I'm still not sure about these Earth-People things.

If you're wondering when the next encrypted garbage will be, then you human, know no better than I. Encrypted garbage takes a lot of time, and I'm still working on that 'English' thing.

Until next time, or whatever it is you say in farewell, humans. I've got to go handle some more official alien business.
  • trying w/ all my might to fuckin write something
  • JoinedJanuary 4, 2016

Last Message
Letspartyrightnow Letspartyrightnow Mar 12, 2018 02:33PM
View all Conversations

Stories by Lem™
Phan Smut by Letspartyrightnow
Phan Smut
a number of oneshots all centered around dan and phil's (fictional) sexual activities. so basically a book of...
Different • Neko Phan  by Letspartyrightnow
Different • Neko Phan
Dan was different. Dan was a neko. After his parents kicked him out, he was forced to take shelter, but what...
Our Beach [boyxboyxboy] by Letspartyrightnow
Our Beach [boyxboyxboy]
No one ever said love was going to be easy, especially if you were in love with your best friends. Preston Wa...