Hi Katelin, waw, I really identify with your "About me" section. I guess a lot of things you say there, I have struggled with it too. Anyway, I wanted to thank you for following me. I am glad you like my work. It means a lot to me :) xx
I've learned a lesson today.
Family doesn't really mean much. It's just a word used to describe a group of people who are simply related by birth. We have no choice. We cannot pick and choose who we want to be related to. Unfortunately. People tell me to "respect" my *family* and that I'll be sad when they're gone. They say I should love them because they're the only one I've got but honestly, people I've never even met are a hell of a lot more of a family then my actual flesh and blood. Chris would go to the ends of the earth just for me, yet my own mother doesn't give a shit if I'm happy, or hurt, or a depressed. People I've never met in person say I'm going to go far, but my own family makes bets on whether or not I'm going to drop out of highschool. I try my best to be a good kid, but it gets harder and harder every day. Everything is eating away at my mind and it's breaking me. Some say I'm strong but I'm not. I know I'm not. I'm *fake*. I pretend. I'm not all there. Some of me is missing. I just don't know what to do. Some days are good, I feel great. I'm happy. Other days I can't even look in the mirror without wanting to put my fist through it. My mask is cracking and I can't stop it. Piece by piece, I'm falling apart and I don't think I can pick up the pieces. Not again.
Sometimes I envy how strong people are. They're always pushed around or knocked down and kicked but they get up, dust themselves off, and smile through the pain. They don't give up, they don't give in, they push on with so much determination. They are warriors, and depression is the enemy while life is the battle