Im a 18yr old fiction writer who is trying to get noticed before she gets published. Writing is my stress reliever when I dont have the energy or space to dance it out. Like when Im at school or my grandparents or in the car. Ha, thatd be a funny sight! Someone trying to dance in a car! 
SO after visiting a couple other peoples profiles i saw how long theirs were & decided to make mine a lil longer to.
I'll mark them off as they get completed

Now for the fun stuff
I hate it when some1 turns on the light while im asleep & im lke (O_-)

When a waitress asks u what u want to drink say frozen water & melted ice. Ud be surprised at how stupid people are!

Clerk:Welcome 2 McDonalds what can i get u
Me:a half dozen chicken nuggets
Clerk:Im sorry we only serve 6, 10, or 20
Me:SO u cant serve me half a dozen chicken nuggets
Clerk:No only 6,10 or20

I throw my desk up in the air sometimes! Sayin aayyyyooo! I'll take a zero!

When a package says "Easy Open" i use a knife, siscors & a lightsaber 2 get it open

Phone rings at 2 in the morning* Were u sleeping? NO I WAS SKYDIVING!

U cry i cry. U laugh i laugh. U jump off a bridge i laugh even harder

Sis:I think some1s breaking in
Me:I'll handle this!*grabs a toilet brush*
Sis:What r u going 2 do? Scrub him 2 death?
Me:Would YOU wanna be touched with this?

I wanna steal a donut truck & go on a high speed chase just cuz i think itd be funny 2 c the cops chasing the donuts(:

RAWR doesnt mean i love u in dinosaur. Ever seen Jaurasic Park? It means im gonna eat u!

A friend of mine said oninons were the only food that could make u cry until i threw a watermelon at his face

Whoever said ANYTHING is possible never tried slamming a revolving a door
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