Hello. Welcome to hell. I am your friendly meme dealer. 

My stories can escalate from lighthearted childish humour to dark and offensive humour.


Story Time With China!
This is my book to my broskitos ITALYblackbutler and Allicatsenpai. It explains how big of an idiot I was when I was younger.

SCREWED SCROOGE - A Hetalian Christmas Carol
This is for all of you Hetalians out there. For once in a story, England isn't depicted as a gentleman. Lemme just say it right now, England is one of the most overrated characters in Hetalia. Along with America (he is in EVERY MMD about Hetalia and pretty much all of them are out of character, for him), Canada (he's not as savage as you think, and stop feeling bad that he's "forgotten". Oh, and stop adding him into the Allies fan art while fORGETTING CHINA), and France (the only reason why he's everywhere in Hetalia is because he's in the FACE family. He's seen as "the rapist," and he's always out of character in everything).


That was a rant.

Attack on Titan - Choose your OWN Adventure (series)
These are choose your own adventure stories that pretty much is the only reason why you're here.

It's just a story about a man writing a book about how society has done messed up and actually writes out steps that explain how humanity fucked itself over (it's in that deep dark corner of my mind, by the way).

How To Kill Humanity: Tsukido's Book of Idiots
This is behind the scenes of what goes on when humanity isn't fucking itself over. In my opinion, I think it's way more messed up than the actual How To Kill Humanity story. I think I was trying to portray that the story is funny yet gross and offensive, but I think that I went overboard. Oopsies.

The Iliad (except it's summed up so today's whipper-snappers can understand)
This is one of my more childish stories. I was getting tired of people not understanding my references, so I made a story summing up what happened in The Iliad.
  • In the MilkyWay Galaxy..... Currently....
  • JoinedApril 20, 2017

Last Message
-SomebodyOnceToldMe- -SomebodyOnceToldMe- Oct 07, 2018 08:03PM
I'm gonna start spamming if y'all don't stop posting useless shit on your message boards. You're not funny. Stop it.
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Stories by uNcLE riCHArD
The Iliad (except it's summed up so today's whipper-snappers can understand) by -SomebodyOnceToldMe-
The Iliad (except it's summed up s...
(The Iliad was originally written by a pretty lit Greek author named Homer.) Join Achilles and his friends in...
ranking #15 in iliad See all rankings
HOW TO KILL HUMANITY (Working On Cover) by -SomebodyOnceToldMe-
The following story contains touchy subjects such as death, war, political views, etc. Viewer discretion is...
How To Kill Humanity: Tsukido's Book of Idiots by -SomebodyOnceToldMe-
How To Kill Humanity: Tsukido's Bo...
"Hello, cretins. 'Tis I. Tsukido the God. And, boy, do I have idiot tales for YOU." Yeah, this is b...
ranking #3 in spaghett See all rankings
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