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My Sister's Boyfriend

My Sister's Boyfriend

32.2K Reads 883 Votes 17 Part Story
Ailsa-Catherine Gillies♥ By prettyreckl3ss Updated Feb 19

A 17 year old teenager named Vanessa falls for a guy who is not only the most attractive guy that her town has seen, but he is also her sister's boyfriend! Vanessa tries to ignore her feelings for the gorgeous guy named Will but things start to get complicated as Vanessa spots a serious flaw in her sister's and Will's relationship.

tinywings6 tinywings6 Jun 28, 2015
Okay I know this seems really stupid and childish and please don't get mad, but isn't God supposed to be capitalized? It's not letting me comment exactly where it is.
tinywings6 tinywings6 Jun 28, 2015
Okay I'm kinda confused so the dad is okay with the boyfriend sleeping over? My dad would load his shotgun at that!
JaneOldaker JaneOldaker Oct 17, 2013
What you have written so far is making me curious to find out what happens next!
xKiraAdamsx xKiraAdamsx Oct 12, 2013
I would recommend taking out the 'I thought' and italicizing her thoughts. Be careful and weary of tense changes. Choose past or present--not both. 
                              
                              Overall the writing style and flow were easy to follow and the story was intriguing. Good job.
sunshine919 sunshine919 Oct 09, 2013
This seems like a pretty unique story. (Thinking of Wills body...) *sighs dreamily* H.O.T hot!! :)