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Wing Beats

Wing Beats

1.4K Reads 97 Votes 4 Part Story
Dana By angiesage4 Updated Feb 05, 2012

What if you were approached with the choice of a lifetime, what if you could gain the ability to fly, but you had to leave your normal life behind.  Angelina is given that choice, she can leave and live a life of adventure, or stay behind with those who love her.  Whatever she chooses, she will spend the rest of her life wondering if her decision was the right one.  Her story takes us around the world with unique characters and fantastical adventures.  Her world will be turned upside down by angels, ghosts and greedy humans.  How does it end you ask?  Well I can't really tell you that, you'll just have to wait and see.

louise152 louise152 May 01, 2012
Your sentences a bit cliche but a bit of editing could sort that out otherwise a very good start :)
give-m3-love give-m3-love Feb 27, 2012
the story was really good, but some of the sentences didnt flow tht well, but tht could be easily fixed by proofreading and playing around w/ the sentence to make it fit *voted
HelloHollyKitty HelloHollyKitty Feb 27, 2012
Its really good, but it just doesn't feel like it flows together, if that makes any sense at all. But, overall I liked and voted! :)
MsArtemis MsArtemis Feb 25, 2012
The sentences are choppy and factual. Work on your transitions so that it's easier to read.
HardyBoyz4Eva HardyBoyz4Eva Feb 04, 2012
I really like this. I haven't read many stories like it, so that is a bonus. Good work!
hrdcorewriter432 hrdcorewriter432 Feb 04, 2012
im liking this so far! definitely planning on reading more :D keep up the hard work