Pitiful child, Not yet ready to die. I shall give you the gift of Time. But my gift has a price to be paid, On your twenty-first year, I'll whisk you away. Away to my world to be my bride.
*you can take out the first *hair, it will flow (the sentence) better
*you instead of we if referring to the mom or if referring to the mom and the daughter it could be you guys; the both of you
Okay I'll post down sp's (spelling errors)
I'm not an expert though. 🙂
I love the first chapter, can't wait to read the rest of the story
Death💀 probably walked in and said "Hmm🤔 I wonder which car will hit you tomorrow, the blue🚛, no! 😰I got it😃, the black⛟😆"