Silent Screaming

Silent Screaming

7 Part Story 2.7K Reads 71 Votes
sasukechar2 By sasukechar2 Updated Jul 18, 2012 04:46PM

Mobs. Riots. FIres. Death. 
    Natalie Maverick has experienced all of these things in the eight years of her life. They were a regular thing in Blackwell Virginia, her hometown. They riots have always been bad, even before Natalie was born. However, they were never this bad. In a riot gone bad, Natalie and her closest friend Dominic are forced to leave town, fearing that they would be in even more danger than ever. That's when disaster strikes. While resting in a house, a lightening storm started, and the house was struck by a bolt of lightening, setting it on fire. Trying to get out safe and sound, Natalie and Dominic get badly injured. That's when Natalie loses everything important to her; her precious memory and her beloved speech.

cookiemonger cookiemonger Apr 13, 2012 12:38AM
Aside from a certain clunkiness (too many extraneous details, awkward grammar), your characters are interesting and I like the way that they get along. It's also an exciting story.
sasukechar2 sasukechar2 Dec 17, 2011 04:26AM
@LiveCrazy_LoveLoud 
                                    :O Thanks! That means so much ^_^ I'll make sure to edit this when I get a chance. I guess I didn't go crazy with my grammar like I usually do.
sasukechar2 sasukechar2 Dec 17, 2011 04:24AM
@CyberLoud 
                                    I'm sorry I made it confusing :/ I really need to fix this, but I'm glad you understood later on ^_^ Thanks for the compliments, they mean alot
sasukechar2 sasukechar2 Dec 17, 2011 04:24AM
@SuperFishieJunior 
                                    Thanks for the grammar help ^_^ I'll fix it when I get a chance
jessiemh_ jessiemh_ Dec 17, 2011 04:15AM
Awesome a lot of action, you do need to however pay attention to your grammar that's all:)
captainvero captainvero Dec 17, 2011 03:47AM
aside from the grammar, that I'm sure others have told you about, I think this story seriously has some potential. A lot of the stories I read in R4R I get bored fast. But this one, it was actually interesting to me! 
                                    It's nice and original, and overall a great story(: