Brutally Honest Reviews™

Brutally Honest Reviews™

33.8K Reads 1.3K Votes 69 Part Story
☆M. St☆ By calmingfire Updated 6 days ago

*I take ALL genres and I try to be unbiased as possible!*
    
          DISCLAIMER: {These reviews/critiques are based on first impressions. I will NOT be reading the entirety of your book. My purpose is to urge my clients to learn something new about their story they would not have been able to see on their own. My intention is not to discourage anyone. However, maybe your review from me will be the catalyst that makes you quit writing for a period of time. Maybe my review is the confidence boost you needed in order to take that next step. Maybe my review will help you see your errors and better yourself. Maybe it did nothing to help you at all and you just think I am a turd after reading me rip through your baby. The point is: My reviews will be something else to every person who comes across them. My goal is to not tell you how to think; I am just a milk dud trying to do something semi-productive as I procrastinate away. (Note: In no way am I implying that I am a superior writer to all of my clients, I just have a decent critical eye on picking out "the bad", I think.) We all have written garbage before (you might be writing one right now and have yet to realize it! Who knows!--Let me help you find out!), this is just a process. A process that has been done a googolplex amount of times throughout the centuries and the multiverse. This is not unique to only you. It is just a cycle that repeats itself, and you are part of it, which is why I am here to shove you along in one tiny portion of it.}
      
          If you think that I'm a "rude bitch", all of this seems too intimidating, or maybe even melodramatic--I get it. To a certain extent, I even agree with you! You know yourself more than I do. No one's forcing you to request, and I'll have less reviews to get to. ♂️
          
          
          ~God, M. Quit the foreplay and get on with it!~
          
      Eh, er--right. I hope you enjoy my services!
      
      (Cover done by moi)

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Dantegoobermdkj Dantegoobermdkj May 24, 2017
So is your summer special still open? Cause I want to make sure you are before I fill in a request.
i was reading through these last night and man, i kinda wanna get my book dragged but i gotta wait til summer rip
wordsbleed wordsbleed Nov 28, 2017
XD okay! So almost a month more XD 
                              I just wish XD I remember the right dates XD
well, damn, gotta wait till winter, wish i found out about this book last year, anyways, i love your reviews, they're freaking hilarious, a lot of character and personality in your reviews, 11/10 :)
rolyatrose rolyatrose Sep 05, 2016
Dang. I kept checking back hoping to request. It's chill though. I totally get it.
Redboy0822 Redboy0822 Aug 06, 2016
I'm scared cause now, I have no idea when you're gonna do my review... Jesus Christ I'm screwed.