VENAROM- remnants of a hidden past.

VENAROM- remnants of a hidden past.

5.7K Reads 572 Votes 41 Part Story
zaria By ZARIAKELVIN Updated Feb 28

Highest ranking  #9 in fantasy (30/9/2016). 
      #FantasyContest2016
      
      What would you do if your mom disappears?
      
      What would you do if you found a note saying  run away?
      
      As for me, I don't know, 
      
      I don't even know whether the things happening are true.
      
      I don't want to believe them.
      
       So I will ignore them as much as I can.
      
      Holding myself together, so that I don't break.
      
      I will just pretend that I don't care .
      
      Even though I continuously asked without a single answer in sight.There was no way out and no one even cared to know if  I was fine with it.I just had to pretend and continue pretending until the end.
      Leaving  a normal world behind for
      a world filled with magic, bringing danger to my door.
      
      A place where powers exist but their users are hunted down like rabid dogs.A different reality  where I could not die but everyone around me faded away at some point. A domain where I was supreme but had to still remain hidden. Fire, Water, Earth, Wind and light all at my service but are they useful ? 
      When I don't even know how to use them.
      
      I don't want to be a part of any of this I only want to protect the one person who stood beside me when I was left alone my only friend who left her everything for my sake.
      
      This is what I thought when I first met them the tribe with only kids in it. The tribe of my kind which was called VENAROM.
      The cover is done by @elphadora
    
    Copyright © 2016 zariakelvin, Zaria Kelvin

  • adventure
  • crossdressing
  • darkness
  • drama
  • fantasycontest2016
  • friendship
  • genderbender
  • humor
  • lightromance
  • magic
  • medieval
  • misunderstandings
  • modern
  • mystery
  • powers
  • story
  • suspense
  • teenfiction
  • wattys2016
  • worldbuilding
NotJodi NotJodi Oct 11, 2016
 #GrimReads intense start. A little vague, but given the fact it's a prologue that doesn't matter. It actually helps in some way.
                              
                              P.S. My favorite bit was you describing Zan. That gave so much to the character without over explaining things. I loved it! XD
stardew- stardew- Jul 07, 2016
There is definetely an air of mystery in your writing. Especially the kids. Like, what is even going on? XD lol, intriguing start, despite the short length!
ClineSmet ClineSmet Jul 11, 2016
This prologue captures my attention immediately :) Great start
LiteraryPenguin LiteraryPenguin Oct 08, 2016
maybe take out the word shitty here and just call them assholes. the shitty makes the commander seem a little more childish than intimidating xD
ZARIAKELVIN ZARIAKELVIN Jul 11, 2016
I am thankful to Panthera_Uncia for helping me out by reviewing and editing this.
Demmie_Lei Demmie_Lei Oct 10, 2016
Interesting beginning. Really quick, which was nice, but could use a bit more details added along with it. Facial features or maybe even the environment would be nice. Still... really good for a prologue.