If Only They Knew

If Only They Knew

5.2K Reads 96 Votes 15 Part Story
Stephanie By FotherMucker Updated Apr 21, 2013

Alyssa has a lot on her plate then she meets a boy name Houston. They both carry a secret not wanting tell the other. In fear of the others reaction. If only they knew there secrets were the same basically. Watch them as they make fools of themselves and have guilt eating at them. But will something from the past ruin their fun?!?!

sweetzzz sweetzzz May 18, 2013
In my opinion people who make comments on peoples writing should Help edit their story. ;  )
FotherMucker FotherMucker Mar 16, 2012
@SofiaJones 
                              oh and thanks about the comma advice, I do need to place them more.
FotherMucker FotherMucker Mar 16, 2012
@SofiaJones 
                              thanks really appreciate it!
                              
                              Though your not suppose to start a new sentence everytime someone talks. You start a new paragraph if a "new person talks." If it is the same person talking you keep it in the same paragraph.
SofiaJones SofiaJones Mar 15, 2012
I like the idea of the story and everything, but you should do more spacing. Every time someone talks or something, start on a new line. Also, I did see a few coma's missing, but it was quite good. Keep it up, it's worth it :)
FotherMucker FotherMucker Mar 10, 2012
@Friday13thx3 
                              yeah the big bold paragraph, tells you that this story needs editing. Because I got back in forth between tenses. But the later uploads are fixed. Aha thanks for the comment
Friday13thx3 Friday13thx3 Mar 10, 2012
I really like this a lot! but you need to edit a bit, you switch tenses sometimes, and need coma's in certain places, but other than that love it! Added to reading list! =D